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Husband struggling with his career

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by daffoteji, Dec 31, 2013.

  1. daffoteji

    daffoteji New IL'ite

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    Well ....what do you do when you have been standing there since last 5 years...however the struggle is still on...
     
  2. daffoteji

    daffoteji New IL'ite

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    Yes that's my worry as when will it last...and Divorce not coz i hate him or so its because I want a better lyf...
     
  3. thegirlygirl

    thegirlygirl Platinum IL'ite

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    Sorry Op, from your words it does not seem like you have been 'standing by him' for 5 years, perhaps you have just dragged yourself along with him for 5 years.

    It seems like you are keen on divorce, just make sure you take a wise decision.

    He might break down after hearing your reasons for leaving him, and it might worsen his present situation and leave him in a vulnerable condition for a long time.

    Good luck to you guys.
     
    2 people like this.
  4. MaliniHari

    MaliniHari Gold IL'ite

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    Dear OP, did you really go through what you have written in your post? Are you sure you are talking about divorce just because he does not make money?

    Yours is a love marriage and where is the love now? Please please review your post. I wish your words on divorce were a mistake.

    Stand by him and watch him grow in his career. Everybody has to go through some rough patches. And its your turn now. Find a job to support him. Or if you are thinking of divorce for this one reason, I would say, it is a very bad decision for which you would pay a lot! Think twice before you decide.
     
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  5. littl

    littl Platinum IL'ite

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    i have seen one or two couple like this but they have kids and mother only takes care of everything ...! the women use to tease him some times but seriously they are leading happy life.
    so whats the problem then keep waiting till he do something and be planned about the future. :) if he continues .... anyway you will be planned right. hope you can. good luck.
     
  6. msm

    msm Gold IL'ite

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    Hi - I can very well understand your frustration. However, have you talked to your husband about this? More so, have you listened to him when he talked about the issues he faced earlier or the one he is facing now? After listening to his struggle - do you also discuss about his plans? What does he want to see himself of in the future?

    Just hypothetically lets assume you move away from him and get married to another person, what if this person has another untold bad face? At least in this marriage, you will be having an upper hand with all the financial freedom you have, your love (with all known positives and negatives) and count that as a blessing to mend the problems that you face now.

    Lot of questions need to be answered before you take any decision. Whats better lyf for you might come at a cost - are you ready to pay for it?

    In my opinion, when there is no physical/verbal abuse thinking of separation is not an option more so when you dont hate him - of course the final call will be yours.
     
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  7. Rihana

    Rihana IL Hall of Fame

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    If you believe in that, and do so strongly, so be it. If you are thinking of divorce, then some questions need to be thought over:

    - did you both ever talk about finances and job, career before the wedding. You did know him well enough since it was a love marriage.
    - will you be better off outside this marriage?
    - how will you ensure that in this marriage or another, both you and your partner will always be earning well and on a promising career track?
    - does he know that you are concerned about the state of his career, and how much it worries you? Or, have you been careful to show only your caring supportive side?

    Whatever you decide, good luck.
     
  8. Saisakthi

    Saisakthi IL Hall of Fame

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    Seriously if your mind thinks of Divorce just because the partner not stable in his job or messy with his job, sounds weird... It all happens... as someone pointed out you call your marriage as LOVE marriage, when money is not flowing as you wished how can the love be washed off.. Surprising...

    Think and Act wise.. you will put him down further if you want to quit your marriage.. SAIRAM...
     
  9. needhappylife

    needhappylife Junior IL'ite

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    Think twice before u go with ur decision. How can you guarantee that next life is good. next person may have good income but fails in character what you will do in that scenario. Money dictate everything but I feel peace and happiness will not come with money. If his job is only concern, better you stand by him.
     
  10. Nakshatra

    Nakshatra Bronze IL'ite

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    For the reasons you posted, Divorce decision seems silly to me when esp it was love marriage. What are your plans after Divorce? What is the guarantee of a better life? Will you be working forever?
     

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