Husband Asking Me To Give Mutual Divorce

Retainer is usually upfront fees of $3k - $5k which should technically be sufficient for a no-contest divorce. The lawyer will put the money in a trust account and deduct hourly charges and filing fees from this. The lawyer is legally required to refund any unused amounts. After divorce filing and upon earliest court hearing date, spousal support and attorney fee reimbursement requests are heard and granted/denied. Support payments are based on a calculator usually and factor in both parties' earnings. If one has no income then somewhere in the range of 20-40% of the earning spouse's paycheck is given to the non-earning spouse. The earning spouse cannot refuse payment after court orders. If he does, it gets directly deducted from his paycheck - that's what I'm told. It's that simple !

@Lakshmipav - Everything I just told you, you can easily know by talking to any lawyer. Each lawyer provides a FREE initial consult where the lawyer learns a bit about your case, and you can learn about how the process works, what you are entitled to, what your rights are. There is nothing to fear in just making a few calls and enquiring. Just filing for divorce doesn't mean the end of your marriage. It just means that $hit just got serious. It can serve as a wake-up call for the offending party and there is enough time during the divorce process to rethink or withdraw.

 

Dear OP,
Here's a big hug to you.. be strong..its time to act, do not waste energy in words anymore. The other ILites have pointed out your next course of action. Don't cling on under any pretext. Do not commit anything without talking to a lawyer. And don't break your heart worrying about whether you'll be able to both daughters with you or about your future etc.
This is a very difficult step, but your husband has pushed you to it, and you must be strong and courageous to do what's right by you and your daughters.
Is there any relative or friend with whom you can stay with, if need be, at short notice?
Please create a backup support person so you have a place to go to in case of emergency.
Quietly keep aside all your important documents and stuff. Keep aside a few essentials for you and your daughter that can be carried out in a jiffy if needed. I am not suggesting that you leave the house now , but telling you to be prepared for any circumstance, considering the harsh words your husband has spoken. They are probably loud words to just torture you into succumbing and signing, but it doesn't hurt to be prepared..
Have you spoken to a women's help group? There are quite a few organisations helping women undergoing abuse, and that includes legal support. It would be a good emergency starting place. You can just call the helpline..
Do not sit and cry over this any more. Just be bold and move forward. Figure out your legal options first.
Have YOU considered legal separation (vs divorce)? One more thing to discuss with the lawyer..
And all difficulties notwithstanding, remember there are some souls out here praying for you..

 

OP can't drive, she is dependent on him for this.

Please use taxi, when you meet lawyer.

 

@Lakshmipav - If you're currently in NC please use this link to compute your alimony and child support
Child Support & Alimony Calculator | McIlveen Family Law Firm

There are plenty of such calculators online that will tell you how much you can expect to get in support payments and for how long.

Even if you are earning, and if your salary is less than your husband's you will still be entitled to support. Hope this clears it up for you. Goodluck !

 

@Lakshmipav - If you're currently in NC please use this link to compute your alimony and child support
Child Support & Alimony Calculator | McIlveen Family Law Firm

There are plenty of such calculators online for each state that will tell you how much you can expect to get in support payments and for how long.

Even if you are earning, and if your salary is less than your husband's you will still be entitled to support. Hope this clears it up for you. Goodluck !

 

Hugs to you dear. Please take care of your health and the health of your baby.
The article below has lots of information.

Untying the Knot

Contact women's support group asap. They can guide you appropriately. There are many support groups.
Sakhi for South Asian Women
MAITRI | Helping Women Help Themselves
Saheli | empowering South Asian women and their families to lead safe and healthy lives
raksha, Inc
Asha for Women

 

@Lakshmipav Hugs to you!

I am very sorry about your situation. Never lose hope. Stay strong! Your girls need you. Your biggest strength is your job. I know nothing about how legal separation works in US. Other posters have given you lots of info.

I stopped by to tell you this: Please get drivers license as soon as you can. It can be very hard to commute in US without being able to drive. And now that you are looking for divorce, this is something you need to keep in in the top of your to-do list.

This is such a B******T story he comes up with.
The gender of a child is determined by the sperm. There are 2 kinds of sperm that men have (differentiated by the sex chromosome) - one that has X chromosome and the other that has Y chromosome. X gives female child and Y gives male child.
Your husband is FULLY responsible for the gender of his child.

I read your older posts. He comes across as a filthy toxic person. Divorce will definitely do good to you and your girls. Since he is extremely abusive, why don't you get some evidence for this. This will be extremely helpful to build a strong case for you.

Good Luck!

 

Please contact one of the women support groups.

 

My sympathies with u.
Just wanted to know where is ur marriage registered??
India or USA??

 

OP, Gather yourself. Your hubby shud be ashamed of himself not to mention a scheming person. He wants your elder daughter with him so he doesn't have to pay you child support.

Start looking for Family lawyers in your city. Ask them if they are willing to take pro bono cases seeing your background. Pro bono means with nominal fees they will be your lawyer in case you didn't know. Tell your background and assets of your hubby. Remember follow Ivanka Trump's Golden rule for divorce- Don't get Mad , get everything.

Child support+ Alimony your hubby has to pay either monthly or in lumpsum. Seeing your hubby's behavior you can chose either one of them. What neandrathal age he lives in?

4 months is a long time yet. Start looking asap for a lawyer and get the ball rolling. You don't need stress during delivery and post surgery.Fix everything before hand so you can handle matters smoothly. Never agree to mutual divorce. You need to get maximum out of this man for being foolish , deceptive and not to mention living in stone age and punishing you. Good Luck and take care.