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Hubbys behavior

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by quincyagain, Mar 17, 2010.

  1. quincyagain

    quincyagain Junior IL'ite

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    Bil and wife came in to our home and we all were heading to a party.
    My husband was ironing his clothes, his brothers wife was dressing up in the same room- not like tieing sari but putting makeup and combing her hair as we were heading out for a party. I was irritated when I saw him there, after ironing his clothes, he was ironing his brothers may be a reason to stay in that room whereas i was struggling with the kids dressing up. I didn't like him to be there in that room when she was dressing up. I have not seen him cheating on me before, but somehow i didn't like what he did this time. I want to ask him but didn;t want to create some scene, i am very sure he is going to be mad at me when i question him.


    I am I overreacting? Friends help...
     
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  2. kavya007

    kavya007 Gold IL'ite

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    Yes, you are definitely over reacting. She was just combing her hair and putting on some make-up. It is not something you would not do in a public place. So what is so bad about that. If you bring this up with your husband he might also feel very cheap that you are connecting him with his own brother's wife.

    Kavya.
     
    Last edited: Mar 17, 2010
  3. asuitablegirl

    asuitablegirl Gold IL'ite

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    Yes, you are overreacting. I would understand if she were putting on langerie or lathering up lotion on her naked body...

    ... but come on! Applying make up? Brushing her hair? If you walk into any mall, you will see women getting make up put on at the beauty counter. Sometimes you even see women put on make up in public. What is so scandelous about that? And brushing her hair??? You sound like the taliban men who think that a man will get mesmerized by seeing a woman's uncovered hair. Get real! He has probably seen thousands of women brushing their hair... be it his own female relatives, friends, coworkers, or strangers on the bus even.

    You mentioned 'when I question him'.... what exactly is there to question him about? Actually, I don't find anything glamorous about putting make up on or brushing hair... so he will probably be so confused as to why you are even mentioning all this, as if it's something for him to get all hot and bothered about. Do yourself a favor, and keep your insecurities to yourself. This is a PHANTOM THREAT.... you are seeing problems which don't exist. JMO!
     
  4. DevikaS

    DevikaS Senior IL'ite

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    you are overreacting.. stop being so suspicious & thinking useless things..
     
  5. quincyagain

    quincyagain Junior IL'ite

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    thanks for ur reply gals,

    May be getting old..:hide: I am with a fat a** with 2 kids and she so thin and slim and when i saw my hubby in the room where she was dressing up i couldn't hold my temper and thinking across my limits. :bonk
    when i was struggling with kids when it was getting late, i don;t expect him to be in a room ironing his brothers cloths when his sil is right there :crazy
     
  6. GiJoe

    GiJoe Silver IL'ite

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    I think the problem is not over-reacting to the current issue, I think there is lack of trust between you and your DH, you have to work on that, looks like your current anger is the result of some of his past behaviors.
     
  7. asuitablegirl

    asuitablegirl Gold IL'ite

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    quincy, looks like you are insecure and too hard on yourself. If you are feeling unattractive, try to get in shape or take care of yourself a little better. sometimes these insecurities we have inside about ourselves, make us think things we normally wouldn't have thought... and which don't make any sense. Try to work on yourself and become more confident.
     
  8. quincyagain

    quincyagain Junior IL'ite

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    may be i am trying to be overly cautious, as i said he looks at good looking girls when we go for shopping/mall but never cheated on me before, as of my knowledge. but i know a family member who tried to cheat on his wife when he was in my hubbys age so i am looking at him in that angle?:hide:
     
  9. GiJoe

    GiJoe Silver IL'ite

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    Well don’t we all like to look at beautiful things? The question is how many people take the next step and act out their fantasies in real life then it becomes a problem. Find ways to get rid of negative thoughts and as ASG said you can join a gym or do some workout at home.
     
  10. kavya007

    kavya007 Gold IL'ite

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    Now come on don't you never ever look at good looking guys. Well honestly I do and I share is also with my husband. Insecurity will eat into your relationship.

    Kavya.
     

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