1. How to Build Positivity in Married Life? : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice

How To Tell My Husband That Wife Is Important?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by madhu26, Aug 28, 2016.

  1. madhu26

    madhu26 Junior IL'ite

    Messages:
    49
    Likes Received:
    5
    Trophy Points:
    13
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi friends,I am a silent reader in this forum.please suggest anyone how to solve my problem. My one is love marriage I am only daughter.my father is against for my marriage but I agree him to tell that my husband is very nice and take care of me well.but after marriage every thing changes.my MIL has one son(my husband) n daughter.my husband Is mom's son after marriage he went to Singapore but he left me in india because his mom's want to stay for some time.that time itself my problem starts.I know initial days every women face this that's y I will be very careful but always my MIL told about bad to my hubby again he use to ask me wat happen I explain him a lot . After 3 months I went sg. Everything is fine two years gone.now I am in india came for delivery.when I am in sg my MIL use to call at midtimes also. We always had fight about MIL. My husband always talking in phone when I ask he told me they are far and they became old.he use to share everything with her only.my MIL also always compared me with my DIL.After that I conceive blessed with baby girl but my MIL don't like first girl. Every function or watever they had fight with my parents.he use to talk in phone like hours with MIL.Every time when I see my father's face I feel guilty that I didn't listen him before marriage that time he explains me a lot but now he is tried to solve my problems.but my husband always says to my dad that ur daughter don't have respect she insult my parents etc...he always blame me.I agree my side also some mistakes but I only want my husband has to understand that wife is also important he has to give respect and value for decisions.but he always want me to understand him he always support his mom.I told my MIL about these problems but she told my son only calling and saying every thing I am not asking.now baby have7 months I am going sg next month.buti don't want to go I am very depressed because i always fights happened don't know how to explain my husband. We are a traditional family so mom and dad always says whatever happens u have to be with ur husband only and I am also thinking about baby's future.I told my husband if I come sg also I will be do my responsibilities only but still he is saying understand me.but I want some love,respect and value.past is past but I want to change and tell understand ds about me can anyone suggest that I am doing anything wrong or right thing is I will be silent until my husband Change.please suggest because I am very depressed that every one us happy y my life is like this
    Thanks for reading long chat

    Thank you
     
    Loading...

  2. priyanka12345

    priyanka12345 Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    464
    Likes Received:
    160
    Trophy Points:
    93
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi,

    You need to be strong now as you have a daughter. You need to ignore abt what Husband talks to MIL. Try to build relation with your husband once you are in singapore. since your daugther will be small , it will be easy to involve him in daily activities of child. once slowly he builds trust in you you wont have this problem. Even if you shout and tell you are his wife and equally important he wont realize unless he himself feels so.
    hence you start respecting your self, get away from the talks of MIL -son and focus on baby.. soon things will be fine.
     
  3. Iamagoodgirl

    Iamagoodgirl Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,628
    Likes Received:
    1,408
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Female
    op this is very common problem.Your marriage is still new.Ignore mil and husband for now.MIL is jealous insecure because her only son i away from her.Try to ignore what mil and husband are talking on phone.Reduce long talk with mil.Talk general topic,ask about her health be very formal.
    On other hand focus on being good wife and good mother.Learn cooking.Get to know what DH like eating.Keep home clean.
    Now listen one more thing .This is highly important.People make opinion about yourself largely from what you talk about yourself and how you project good things about yourself.I assume you are home maker since you have not mention that you are doing any job.Now do following things regularly if you want to earn respect from DH.

    When DH come home welcome him with smile ,offer him some snack or refreshment drink.Then ( i assume he is in good mod after that) tell him how do you clean kitchen or clean bathroom.Tell him how do you manage to get necessary things cheaper at sale.(you actually do this).Tell him how you want to save money because he works hard outside and brings money to home.Tell him what you did to become good mother today .Eg you tell your daughter tales from ramayana,mahabharata.

    If you bring anything costly or spend money eating outside or anything which is not necessary DO NOT TELL HIM.Because he is going to pass those things to MIL and she is going to against you to drive wedges between you and him.Whenever you open your mouth to DH never tell him your mistakes,complains or sob stories,anything which He can see as negative.

    Even when you talk with MIL on phone repeat above.Whenever you talk to your parents repeat above on phone.
    Do not ever think that your husband is best friend to whom you can vent ,tell your mistakes ,sob stories and he will act like your best friend.Use this forum for that.You can tell us about mil problem ,your mistakes and everything else.
     
  4. Vandana12323

    Vandana12323 New IL'ite

    Messages:
    11
    Likes Received:
    2
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Female
    Great advice... This is helpful for me too...thanks
     

Share This Page