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How To Take A Break From Kids And Home?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by gamma50g, Jan 25, 2023.

  1. gamma50g

    gamma50g Silver IL'ite

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    I really do not have a place to go take a break from the monotone of home and kids. I don't have extended family or siblings home that I can go to. I don't have a mother's home since she passed few years back. I even lost my right to threaten my hubby that I'm going to my mom's home if we have an argument :tearsofjoy:.

    What do women in similar circumstances do to take a break and catch their breath?
     
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  2. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    You can take a “staycation” with friends or even by yourself! People do that a lot these days.You don’t need to travel a lot but maybe book a room in a good hotel nearby for a day and stay there.

    Else ask your husband to take the kids to the city or library or park for few hours and all you need to do is have a takeout and watch a movie:) few hours of peace
     
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  3. drdiva

    drdiva Silver IL'ite

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    Join ladies club in your city which organize local meetup and outstation trips.
     
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  4. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    I need to be away from the home also or I will go and sort the top shelf of a closet or go find the measuring tape and start measuring how furniture or beds can be rearranged. : )

    I've taken a few car trips by myself within three hours driving distance. For a while it was near lighthouses, then for a while I visited lesser known waterfalls. Then, I moved on to oceanside cliffs. : ) I find places that have long walks along oceanside cliffs that are popular and busy (for safety). I stay at a hotel nearby. My latest method is to find a group hike of a picturesque place about two or three hours away. People carpool and make it a long one day trip. I go stay at a hotel the previous day, get my me-time and the group activity the next day. Often I also get company for the drive back home and dinner on the way.

    If anonymity weren't golden, we could go together maybe. : )

    This blog maintained by an older Indian couple, Dhara and Kishore, is often my planning source. Roadtripping California
     
    Last edited: Jan 26, 2023 at 12:14 AM
  5. drdiva

    drdiva Silver IL'ite

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    Rihanna looks like you stay in the vicinity of so many picturesque places.
     
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  6. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Yes, Northern California, the best place on earth. : ) Or close to that.

    Until the pandemic I didn't realize just how many lesser known gems are so close by.

    Also, that dreamy description above does not talk about the many badly planned trips. Like the one I took with a friend and we had different ideas about what was "let's start early tomorrow morning." : ) : ) Or the one where I drove to a state park that had been closed for two years due to wild fires and I somehow missed that info in my research!
     
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  7. Anbhu

    Anbhu Silver IL'ite

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    Dont know if you live in India or abroad.

    If abroad try cruise ships. Recently known family went for a 4 day trip to Bahamas. Ship buffet had multiple cuisines including Indian. House keeping took care of the room. As food and cleaning had been taken care of there was no work. They payed $1800 for two adults and two elementary school kids. Safety wont be an issue even if we go alone. Just go eat sleep take rest and come.

    In India, there are tour buses to take to temples or nearby attractions. I and a friend went to Shirdi from Hyd. Booked with travel agent, bus started in the evening, stopped for dinner, next day it reached Shirdi. Hotel booking was included in the booking but we used only to fresh up and left the same day. Hotel booking can be extended for a day or two, return bus can be booked based on that. YMCA hostels are also safe to stay but you need to take membership. Plan a trip for a city that has YMCA hostel and you can visit nearby attractions and rest a day or two. Talk to a travel agent in your town.
     
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  8. hrastro

    hrastro Finest Post Winner

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    Not sure where you stay, so I cant get into specifics - what I've done is -
    1) Go on a trip with girlfriends - school/college friends, husband's friends' wives, music class friends, child's friends' moms etc... On your own also fine...
    2) Send everyone at home out - park, library, zoo, museum, shopping - and sit with a nice relaxing book and popcorn
    3) I go to my DH's sister's place and plonk myself, stay overnight, get pampered and complain complain complain :blush: of course, she will support her brother, but since it is never anything serious and I get good food and sweet words and no work, I enjoy the peace and come back refreshed.
    4) Sometimes I just say - today you all take care of everything and leave me alone.... I just close my room and stay in bed with books! I just dont talk to anyone and they take care of their food (sometimes cook for me too) .... and after a day, I feel I can get back to the world
    5) I joined fulltime work in the past few months after several years of being a stay-at-home mom, I am going on so many conferences and meetings, so now I want more time at home :fearscream:

    Keep smiling!
    HR
     
  9. Srama

    Srama Finest Post Winner

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    Dear @gamma50g ,

    This is something many of us face. I am pleased you re thinking about this
    and I would only urge you to think long term. I don't know what to suggest but I can certainly share what helped me the most or best. Way back after my second child, winters and a toddler made me think about this. I did three things that have stood me in good stead - I continued with my work out routine at 5.30 am, I signed up for a 6 month art class at a local art institute only to realize, it did not kindle me as I thought it would and so almost on an impulse signed up for a yoga teachers certificate program. I have to tell you, I have not looked back since then and it's been over a decade. With kids more independent now, other than my work, family and friends these three things keep me going - workouts, doing art work and teaching yoga.

    Workout is almost always when everyone is sleeping or before the day begins - so no one is disturbed.
    Art of course is when inspiration strikes - so can get interrupted
    But, teaching yoga is a definite 'me thing' - whether zoom or in-person, one person or 10 students, family knows not much will be/can be done at that time.

    I do not seek anything (name/fame/money/validation etc) through these three activities. I simply do them!

    Hope that helps!
     
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  10. sociallifein30s

    sociallifein30s Gold IL'ite

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    I said this to another person in IL. When I was living in the USA, I rented a 2b 2bath. 2 girls were staying.
    One of this other colleague/friend, she used to come over to my house when she was feeling down or wanted a break from everyone. She made tea, ordered pizza, watched tv. Of course didnt peep into our stuff or anything. But she used a bed we had and by 5 or 6, she used to either come to office or go home.
    That was a friend so I didnt mind giving her a copy of my key.

    Maybe look for those shared apartments near your office. If you are not working, ask a friend who works in one of those MNCs for a shared apartment posts near to some offices. If its affordable, you can just go there, get rest.

    Of course, the other thing is to go group travel. From what you said, solo travel might not be for you right now.
    Go to the meetups in India or near your place. you will find something.
    Good Luck.
     
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