I grew up in an environment amongst toxic relatives and a pattern of emotional abuse.I realized that.Plus some people who were actually nice initially once we got close true colors came out.I left the relationships after being used for help and treated like a piece of furniture who does not exist.Its been tough but now am doing things which are right for me. However I want relationships and good friendships..I really don’t know how to connect anymore.Even if someone is nice to me I feel after sometime they may end up trying to control me and so I maintain a distance.I know not everyone is the same way but I feel a strong mental block. To women who have good friends or healthy relationships how did u do it.. Some tips to build trust
Dear @anika987 It happens to me too. Couple of my friends told me the same thing too. ithu thaan ulaga niyathiyo.. we are not like them avlo than .. verenna solrathu. Last week I met a friend say B in temple accidentally after 4 years. I was the one deliberately blocked her contact. It's complicated, she is a good person but controlling me too much but fault is mine, I don't know how to say no to her without hurting her. I have another friend say A in her neighbor hood ,I was the one introduced friend B to my long term friend A . Friend A broke my trust/heart. It was so unbearable So I blocked them both. Fast forward, I had no choice other than unblocking Friend B after the temple accident. Because friend B was talking so smoothly without any hiccups and put me through guilt trip. Verdict Human emotions are very complex and complicated and drain our energy way too much. Less is more in friendship Zone I guess.
So true..atleast I know am not alone.. however some women seem to be having so many friends wonder how they do it Somewhere I feel like am the bad person who cannot be friends with anyone a guilt Kind of..where I go wrong..
My another friend she is a network queen, after covid even she is feeling what we are feeling now. Poor her, she asked me why her friends behave differently in her house party compared other's house parties. She said they are less enthusiastic in her home, which was really shocking to me because she is extremely confident ,organizing parties and entertaining people well in short she is Type A category. She feels very lonely and I feel very bad for her. Because she needs people around her all the time. Hope it helps you in some way and believe me I am not a regular here but whenever I come to this forum I always impressed by your simplicity and genuinity in expressing your feelings. To me these qualities make you a wonderful and pleasant soul to be friends with. I can tell you loss is not yours.
