1. How to Build Positivity in Married Life? : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice

How to persuade my wife to start working?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Ajith, May 27, 2010.

  1. asuitablegirl

    asuitablegirl Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    3,369
    Likes Received:
    365
    Trophy Points:
    183
    Gender:
    Female
    Well then if she doesn't act even after he discusses with her, he needs to act and sell the house! Yeah, he can't force her to work. But she can't force him to drown in an ocean of financial debt either. :drowning

    Right as we speak, poor Ajith is probably slogging his butt of at work while his wife sits in her million dollar home eating bon bons and watching reruns of kuch kuch hota hai. That's totally cool if your hubby is Anil Ambani. Totally not if he's an average working guy in America.
     
  2. Spiderman1

    Spiderman1 Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    4,555
    Likes Received:
    102
    Trophy Points:
    130
    Gender:
    Male
    No.

    But how about firmly telling her they are going to downsize to a smaller home/townhouse and perhaps move to a different lower cost city. If she wants the luxury house, then good morning Dr. Mrs.Ajith.
     
  3. sarma

    sarma Senior IL'ite

    Messages:
    232
    Likes Received:
    5
    Trophy Points:
    23
    Gender:
    Male
    Right!

    Let's a have a tough talk with this LOW IQ doctor who needs some tough medicine! She is forgetting that she has to earn and how dare she wants the usual stuff!

    For the kind of money she could pull in she settled for (only) a million dollar home, which by the way many Software engineers in Silicon Valley afford with single incomes. And a milion dollar home in nice neighborhoods in CA is not that super!

    Yeah, time for some personal slave driving! Time to be assertive! What does this MD know about running a house and paying mortgage? She can't do the basic math to figure out whether they can afford it or not!
     
    Last edited: May 28, 2010
  4. Spiderman1

    Spiderman1 Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    4,555
    Likes Received:
    102
    Trophy Points:
    130
    Gender:
    Male
    Dude,
    Right indeed. You cant have the cake and eat it too. So, yeah time for some personal finance Math to be taught to Doctor. No one is saying she has Low IQ, but have you heard of the term REALITY CHECK, sarma?
     
    Last edited: May 28, 2010
  5. Tridev

    Tridev Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,284
    Likes Received:
    28
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Gender:
    Male
    He cannot sell it unless she signs, if she is co -signee. Which I would Imagine she is to get that big loan....

     
  6. asuitablegirl

    asuitablegirl Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    3,369
    Likes Received:
    365
    Trophy Points:
    183
    Gender:
    Female
    If she refuses to sign so the house can be sold, even after Ajith says he can't handle it anymore, that is out right hostility, and if that happens, there is a whole lot more problems in the relationship than just financial issues. I can hardly imagine a spouse doing something so blatantly hostile.
     
  7. sarma

    sarma Senior IL'ite

    Messages:
    232
    Likes Received:
    5
    Trophy Points:
    23
    Gender:
    Male
    That's a euphemism used by a lot of manipulative managers, Spydie to get their way! We both know it!
     
  8. SriVidya75

    SriVidya75 Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    7,302
    Likes Received:
    957
    Trophy Points:
    270
    Gender:
    Female
    I guess we have to wait for Ajith to come back and confirm whether he did put his foot down already in the past? why it didnt work? what were her reasons etc? before we go about bashing anyone! Sometimes these things are not discussed out in the open by men...mostly thinking that either the wife would underestimate their earning capabilities or that she might resist the idea of cutting down on expenses.

    Bottomline is..did he talk about this previously?? if yes what was her answer? and what was his reaction? I see in Ajits post that more than cutting down on expenses, he wants her to work!!! there is diff. here in the way he is expecting things to be workedout! point to be observed!!
     
  9. sarma

    sarma Senior IL'ite

    Messages:
    232
    Likes Received:
    5
    Trophy Points:
    23
    Gender:
    Male
    Let's not malign her just cuz she is taking a (potentially long) break!
     
  10. Tridev

    Tridev Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,284
    Likes Received:
    28
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Gender:
    Male
    I agree, to malign is not right really....I also see OP has kids so probably she is at home and kids dont go to day care, that itself saves 2400$ a month . And moreover let us not forget, she may be investing valuable time in kids and their upbringing. What she can do is offer suggestion to OP to scale down cost or how she can help a little to meet expenses if possible. Or to move to Texas, but she may have her own reasons to stay put too.

     
    Last edited: May 28, 2010

Share This Page