Third old guy sounds good. That's probably the kind of attitudes you want to surround yourself with -Non judgmental, able to see you as you are, accepting of you as you are warts and all etc. Though it would be better if they were younger people. I didn't know all your coworkers were so old. Well it's more than that really. The reason I said you must be spending most of your time with older people is because of some of the attitudes you express in your posts - like your fear of a stigma of divorce or therapy - these attitudes are much more common in women of my generation than in people your age and I'm definitely older than you. My kids, or my nephews/nieces, in their 30's, dont talk or think like this and a couple of them have had breakups and a raw deal in life etc etc but they kind of took a short break and just went right back in. That's why I felt that perhaps you have spent most of your time around older people and unconsciously absorbed their views on things. Look, at some level, you have to get out there and restart your life. I strongly urge you to put more of your energy into actively meeting more people your own age and spending time with them. You'll be a lot happier. In my opinion, you would be perfectly justified if you were to tell your folks - "Look I tried it your way, bowed my head and agreed to an arranged marriage to a man who looked perfect on paper and look how that turned out. So now I'm just going to go out there on my own and find my soul mate. I'm going to rely on myself and my instincts and take my chances." And just go for it. But even if you are not ready to do that and I understand it may seem challenging, at least try to enjoy your single life, get out there, make a bucket list and start doing things, travelling and meeting people. You are young and you are healthy right now and neither of these things are going to last forever you know? Best wishes.