Hi, I would like to take experiences of working moms who left their babies with others during their office hours. I want to rejoin in office in coming month. but small small fears are pushing back to home maker position. even to listen, they are tiny issues, if we consider from babies point of view, they are uncomfortable & big issues to their age. For example....when i left my baby with others(MIL or FIL or DH or some one else) i observes that.. 1. Panty is wet & he is crying bit. but they are trying to engage him with toys or funny expressions. but they didn't check baby panty until i requested them. 2. Baby is sleepy. but they will try to play with him until his crying goes on top. 3. feeding solid food to baby with out keeping water beside. if he struggles with food swallowing problems, they are searching for water . 4. when i assigns food feeding duty to some one else, they will try for 5 or 10 min. if baby is taking too much time, they are loosing their patience & trying to feed him forcefully or will stop feeding him. 5. after feeding, they are not cleaning properly like under neck. so infection will raise. 6. If baby poo or after feeding, MIL will clean baby with normal tap water which is cooler than normal temperature. 7. trying to feed spicy food to baby even he is rejecting. if he cries, they will stop feeding but doesn't try for another food. 8. doesn't how interest to make baby foods properly like using mixer. trying to feed our normal foods directly or in smashed way. so baby felts uncomfortable to eat. 9. leaving baby in walker for long time even with out giving water & trying to engage him with toys or some thing else if he cry. they are not able expect baby need until i am telling to them. 10. Showing love like me...like hugging baby & kissing baby & talking with baby. so on... 11. while doing bath, not caring to avoid soap water in his eyes so on... dear working MOMs...I & my cousin had gave birth to babies at same month. but i stayed at home for my baby & he is 10KG around now. but cousins baby is 6.5KG only because she is working & left her baby with her MIL. so i am fearing about my baby health if i left baby with MIL or care taker to join in office. please share your experiences in this points & how you avoided problems...
Hi , lit is very difficult to get back to job after spending time with little one and taking care of the baby full time . first I would say trust the caregivers , there are your family and love the baby . Remember your mom/mil has experience in child rearing so they know what they are doing . if it is mil , please do see the differences under magnifying glass ,be objective . Actually it is good if they feed the baby normal home food making it les spicy with ghee . It is better it is not grind to paste , your baby will be accustomed to regular food and lot of headache will go away . but if you still would like to purée the food , I would suggest you cook the food , grind and keep it in the fridge , so that they only need to heat and feed. fill multiple sippy cups with water and keep handy at different places so they have it ready by their side when they are feeding or playing etc . wet nappy - can you use nappy pads if you are in India , it will make keep the baby dry . if not at least initially you can call and routinely ask questions about food, nappy , sleep etc . This will remind them if they forgot . washing with less than normal temperature water,ask them if they need hot water while they are doing the chore And see what is the response . Kids get used to whatever you do , so don't stress . One of my friend used to give cold milk to baby because it will eliminate one step of heating milk when the baby is crying , baby is used to it and enjoys it. My mom says bath the baby with hot water , my mil says bath with mildly warm almost room temp water which to me felt very cold for bath , but my kids enjoyed both and were ok . Another one my mom said introduce bottle , I did Not listen and then my kid never took bottle so I had to come home from office every afternoon to feed him till he was 1 , learnt the lesson . They will get accustomed to it , since you are there at Home and rush to their help , so they take it easy . No one can replicate your care , so take it easy . There will be little issues but it will fall into place . you are lucky you have family to take care of the baby . Relax and get back to job .
Actually these are not small problems at all. What your list tells me is that the ppl caring for your baby are not familiar with children, out of touch maybe, a little ill prepared, and a little impatient kinds. Your in laws are old now. Instead of putting full responsibility of baby care on them, can you hire a maid to do all this, and have your mil supervise her? You can train her for a month or so and give her detailed instructions about exactly what to do. Dont think about the cost of hiring the maid, think you are paying for your peace of mind.
I totally agree with armummy. You are lucky you have your family to take care of baby. Not some outsider - daycare or nanny. First - noone can do, what mothers do or atleast thats what we think as we have our way of doing things for baby that we think are best. I remember when my mom was here, I was not so happy her doing few things in her way. But I was immature and now i think she cared for my baby more than me. About MIL/inlaws or parents - few things they do, are from their own experience, they have brought up us, and we did well. Also at this age, they can not keep up with child's energy levels ,to talk,play with him all the time. We get over possessive. Atleast its not outsiders hands touching your baby. DH/younger people- do not know much and have to be instructed. From your talks and baby weight , your baby looks older so there should be less worry. We have started nanny for my baby and so far, i have not gathered courage to leave her alone with her at home, so I wfh . My work suffers, bad impression to office people. My baby sufffers..can not give her 100%.
you are exactly right. people are old aged & tired with works. thnx sandhya. i will work out your suggestion.
