How to cope with a spouse who blames you for infertility?

Thanks Endlesshope. He's otherwise an ok guy.He does care a lot for me except for this issue.He's just not conditioned to handle complications boldly.If things don't go according to his plan,all hell breaks lose.I am reading the PCOS threads,they are really motivating.

 

Honestly guesshoo,as I said I am more stressed because of his attitude and his mom's manipulations on him than because of PCOS. Long logical reasoning and speeches just make him uneasy,he just gets into defensive mode.But you are right,part of me is scared to have baby with him with this kind of attitude.He's immature not going to change,so its no use trying to wait and change his behavior.Thanks a lot for your inputs.

 

Very true rohinipadi. My H belongs to that category of men.I have realised long back that its no use trying to get that emotional support from him.Its better to seek it out here in Il,my friends and in some cases my parents.

 

SGBV,
Thanks a lot and congrats on your pregnancy;-)I want to plan a child because I want to be a mommy,not for my H or due to pressure from my Mil.I don't care how he acts or behaves,I want to do it for myself.A few months back I would have been scared to death hearing the word "baby",felt really insecure and not mentally prepared.Now I am prepared,I don't know how to explain this but my heart skips a beat every time I see a woman with her children.When I have a baby,I am pretty sure my world will revolve around her(hope its a girl) and I will be so wrapped up that however insensitive my H or mil behave,it will have zero effect on me.And I am in no hurry,when God wills it,it will happen.
My H gets easily influenced by people,that's one of the reasons for his idiotic mind.Yeah I do pray to God everyday and hope he comes to his senses.Till then I have to suck it up!

 

@ jasenilaa,
Thanks so much for taking the time to reply.That's what I have been trying to tell him all along,he just doesn't seem to get it.I try my lvl best not to take stress from him,that's the best I can do at the moment.

 

ShilpaMa,
I have been yearning to talk about other options with my Dh like you mentioned,but its exactly these kind of conversation which will make him have sleepless nights.I wanted to get tested for PCOS few months back itself,once I voiced my concerns to him my ovulation was erratic and felt like I was suddenly gaining weight without any reason.And he became upset and said something like"What are you saying?Why do you think so...I don't think you will have..blah blah."He's the kind who can't face changes in life or take decisions easily.I am not exaggerating guys,even for simple tasks like selecting a new apartment,a shoe or a t shirt he gets confused so much,takes so much time and needs approval to make sure what he selected is a good choice.I guess before marriage it was his mom now its me
I am open to anything,in fact I would love to adopt if things don't work out.But with the way he's been acting I doubt he will stand by me through thick and thin.

 

A part of me still cares and loves for this heartless cruel beast and I really hate to admit that.Thanks Anitap and no sorry's my H totally deserves that