I'm going to relocate to my hometown in India after 10 years stay in the US. DW has already moved to India and our second child is due this Nov. Here are where things stand ( More details on my family situation can found in this thread http://www.indusladies.com/forums/r...8828-confessions-of-erstwhile-mommas-boy.html . Moderators please allow this link for better clarity ) 1. DW is not in talking terms with my mom because of all the history of events. My relationship with DW has improved only recently.I'm a changed man now and will not allow my mom or anyone else to cause trouble to my DW. At the same time I want to maintain a good relationship with them. 2. My mom , my brother and his family has not even seen our daughter in person who will turn 3 this Nov inspite of DW/DD now being in India. Basically DW has severed all ties with everyone in my family. 3. I was in India for 2 weeks to drop off DW and DD and to start preparing for my relocation. I've good rapport with some of cousins, aunts and uncles and they were very eager to see our DD. I somehow avoided them as I was in India for only 2 weeks quoting work reasons. DW has no issues with them as such. But because of lack of contact with my mom she has not. DW was very adamant in me not taking our DD to my mom's place and my mom coming over to her place. My mom has clearly told all our relatives that DW does not want to mingle with any of us and ensured that its all DW's fault. 4. My mom, my brother and his family are very close to my cousins and their families. They meet often and even go on long trips with them. When I move back, they expect me and DW to start getting into this circle. DW is pretty outspoken and had threatened me several times that she will bring all the attrocities of my mom with all my extended family. I'm not afraid of all these but feel very awkward.I'm a very private person and feel embarassed to talk about family tiffs and arguements even with my cousins/aunts. 1. When our second child is born, should I call my mom, bro and his family to the hospital to see the child ?? Heck, they have not even seen our first child..My mom called me hen-pecked and not having the guts to bring my DD to her place when I was in India last.When my mom did not get to see DD she hardly shows any interest in talking to me or when I talk about DD. 2. What do I tell my cousins/aunts about my second child when he/she is born ? You know how its in India. All your relatives will come whereever you are to see a new born. Should I just call them and let them come to the baby ? DW maybe okay with my extended family coming and visiting her in the hosp. But this is so embarassing for me when my mom is not allowed , but my cousins and aunts are allowed to see the new born. I'm just thinking of the future possibilities and feel very embarassed. 3. DD's birthday is in Nov. and I really want all my relatives from my side to come to the party. I have not even brought up all these things with DW but I will have to discuss someday or other and with DW being pregnant , it makes it even more difficult to make things work like I want to. If relocation itself is not enough to cause stress, I have these family issues to deal with. I want DW and DD to mingle with my side of the family as well and share good bonding with them. It seems like this is not going to happen at all The other choice or rather the only choice I have is that I will need to just avoid my cousins and aunts and just have a quiet birthday celebrations of DD and not announce the birth of our 2nd child as well. This is something I really don't want to do and find it very embarassing. I will be losing my face with my relatives. I could override DW's way , but this will only cause more rifts in our relationship which could have resulted in a divorce. Any suggestions on how I should convince DW in atleast be in talking terms with my mom and my extended family without making it a heated arguement ? Should I get someone in my family side to talk to DW and tell her that my mom is not that much of a bad person and atleast be in talking terms? Am I trying too hard in trying to keep everyone happy here ?