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how to be more open and speak up courageously

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by Melody123, May 13, 2014.

  1. May 13, 2014 #1
    Melody123

    Melody123 New IL'ite

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    Halo friends, please help me with this. I am 24 and have been married for 3 years. I am a very mild natured girl and was intimidated by my new sarroundings after marriage and still I have to get some things worked out. I am a house wife and have a DD who is 1 year 3 months old. I feel that I am hesitant in many things. I could'nt find the courage to say NO to my MIL. She supports me very well and takes good care of my kid. but she is a very sensitive person and wants to do things her way in certain things. whenever she asks me to do somethings that is not agreeable to me or I am less likely to do, I find myself giving YES to her even though i dont feel like doing it. I could not find the courage to say NO to her. I just fear the outcome and I hate conflicts. And I am also hesitant in asking things to her for which she is less likely agreeable to because in case she does not agree with me , I am afraid how to take that NO from her and convince her of my needs. I guess I am the only one being like this. But please advice me for being better, open and getting things done and avoiding hesitation.
     
    Melody123, May 13, 2014
    Melody123, May 13, 2014
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  2. May 13, 2014 #2
    Goahead

    Goahead Silver IL'ite

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    you sound like me, but believe me if you dnt speak p things will be inside you and you will loose your mind over it. Start practicing this one at a time. if you want to have something done, thing about how you will bring it to her, write down all the scenarios that she may say and what shall be your answers to it. Pacts ths for a day before going n front of her...when you do this 510 times, you will see yourself changing .

    You said your MIL is nice overall, so remember that sometimes when living together you have to sacrifice.so bring up things that are really important to you. pick your battles.

    Also, time is a key. yor mil will start loosing control over time...so dnt create a fight for everything, but instead do the chaploose...talk to her very nicely, praise her all the time, appreciate her work etc etc and n between say what you want to say...

    if you give some example, I will b able to phrase it more for you..
     
    Goahead, May 13, 2014
    Goahead, May 13, 2014
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