That is the right way to think .. trying and keeping on trying until you get closer to that peaceful acceptance. The people or circumstances around you may or may not change . May also take awful lot of time to change but by then we might have done some irreparable damage to our health, self esteem, growth and lifestyle. Think of this as a mind game and just plan meticulously how you spend your every waking hour, every conversation, phone call , meeting the family or group to be productive for yourself first. You take care of yourself, family , job, home and then allocate some hour per week where you will help your extended family and that too with a detached approach. The energy other people bring to the table can be heavy, victim mentality, critical and helpless talk. You just defend yourself from that and stay close to your development plan. Take baby steps.. listen to your victimizing self talk and counter argue like the women in this thread and counsel yourself everyday that you actually have it better than many others and you are not dependent on appreciation from outside. When you have the strong determination to change, you will find the time, tools and support system to make that happen. Many times we think supporting friends are supposed to join our pity talk and bash the same people we are complaining about and tell their own sob stories and so forth... Every time you narrate your story you live the emotions one more time which actually may be counter productive. Once you step into positivity you may connect with new people or hobbies which will keep you engaged and energetic.