How many are wearing Thali/Mangalsutra ?

Good topic to discuss!!!. I wear my Thali always. Never removed it intentionally. My metti.. I never wore in India. But after coming to US i have started wearing it... Bindi and bangles come out only when i wear Indian dresses..been the same way in India/US, Pre/Post-Marriage.

My DH has no issues with me removing my Thali. Back in India my FIL asked me once why i never wore my metti, I just told him i was not comfortable, he did make a little fuss but been fine after that. He must be happy to see that i have changed after moving to US

Only person who wants me to have my thali always on is my mom. Many of my cousins dont wear and so she is always worried. Almost every time she calls up she checks if I am still wearing!!!

Personally i feel its independent choice. Having a Thali on doent increase mean one is more committed to their marriage. It more of an emotional symbol and personal choice.

I chose to wear it...even though DH feels it doesnt suit some of my dresses ...!!!

Ramya

 

Pottu is a must for me from my childhood days but not the one on my hair.

Metti - I don't remember wearing it after a few weeks after I got married. (and nobody objected)

Thali- a part of my attire but I am comfortable when I remove it alongwith my bangle and watch when I retire at the day's end.(MIL indirectly objected but didn't bother )

We believe in true love not symbols and no superstitions.

DH asks me to remove thali when I go for walks. (Chain snatchers get fooled.:biglaugh:biglaugh)

 

I always wear my thali - like you said i wear it in a thin chain .I have seen lot's of people within my family itself removing thali since it doesn't go very well with western clothes.I don't see any harm in not wearing one - it's upto the individual.

For me it's sort of a symbolic representation of my love for hubby , so i feel very bad even when i remove it for wearing it in a different chain/take it for cleaning . My DH is also not very keen in not wearing thali . There were occasions i felt like removing it , especially when you wear stylish jewellery and stuff - though didn't do it yet

 

:thumbsup Well said, exactly the way I feel. I dont wear Thali, metti, bangles and Bhindi when I go out to work or anywhere else, except at home I always put a bhindi on.

I dont mean to offend people, but I've seen some people with yellow thick thali threads over an off shoulder / low neck shirts over jeans and jarring Bhindis and even glass bangles......and you got to admit it looks awkward. I'm not saying it's wrong or bad....I'm only saying it doesnt look good....and it's really upto the individual to feel comfortable dressing like that ! But I wouldn't do the same myself....or I'd be terrible embarrassed and I'm sure I will attract a lot on undue attention, not that I care and do things because others may feel odd about it...I do it because I will not BE COMFORTABLE OTHERWISE !

 

I am going to get brickbats for this, nevertheless, am entitled to an opinion.I am with nizampori and desiheart.I have seen desi women wearing jeans, bindi, anklets, bangles, big jhumkas along with the thali/ yellow thread.It does look awkward to me.Especially when you want to dress up the western way, I think we need to do complete justice to it.Similarly for the Indian attire.I can understand the bangle, jhumkas, anklets for an Indian attire but definitely not for a western attire. Its fine if thE thali will be completel hiiden inside the top, but from what i have seen for many it doesnt and hence looks a little awkward.
Now to what I do, I dont wear thali..my husband wanted me to take it off the very first night (for obvious reasons)...and he is never cynical about this..he just says its my wish and my comfort..So coming to US, I havent worn it..with any western outfits..but I do wear it with my saree or salwar.I will wear the thaali if my ILs/ parents visit me or when I visit them..because I dont think they will approve of it and also that am not that gutsy to face them without my thaali.

 

Good to see similar opinions being echoed like mine.....
Again not to offend anybody but like cheenikum mentioned, it is so embarassing to see desi women dressed up as wannabes in jeans and western dresses with noticeable thick thalis, bindis, anklets, bangles what not !
Same scene I have noticed in workplaces too, I once interviewed an Indian lady who came for the interview in a business suit and bindi, and jhumkas !!! What the HEYYY :hide: !!!
Just seems as if they really force themselves to wear or want to wear
western wear with an uncompromising outlook. Why is it so impossible to go for a more polished complete look while wearing western clothes ? Nobody is going to sacrifice their centuries-old traditions by doing that.
The defensive argument will be everyone can wear what they like to wear or are comfortable.
In that case, we don't see men dressing up in comfortable women's clothing, do they ???

I know I will be criticised for my opinions, but then opinions are like belly-buttons - everyone has one
So, please no offence, this is strictly my opinion.

 

I agree that wearing large earrings and big bangles with glittering bindis does make western wear look awkward.But if the same ,say earrings,bindis etc. are small,does it matter? It will still look very good with western wear.

Also,thaali /mangalsutra is just not any jewellery for us to contemplate on whether we should wear it or not.It is a symbol of marriage and atleast to me,it is important and sentimental.If many of you are comfortable and do not feel guilty about not wearing it,then why do you wear it when inlaws visit you or when you visit India? I have seen many ladies here suddenly change into a complete Indian naari whenever their inlaws visit them-all salwars,bangles,thaali etc etc. If one is so courageous and thinks that wearing a thaali is just ones choice and that no one else should dictate it to her,then why change suddenly when inlaws are present?Should you not stand your ground even at that time and just not wear it?

 

I used to wear Thali and bindi while in India, when i used to wear sarees or Salwars. But since we moved out of India, I have completely stopped wearing any Indian clothes and hence dont wear the Thali and bindi. My husband has no problem with this as far as i am comfortable with what i do. And......i stay this way even during my India trips or when my in-laws or mom visits us. My in-laws must have noticed but never commented or raised a question on that.......my mom did tell me a couple of times, but then i told her as far as my dh and i are comfortable, i dont want to put on a show to please somebody.....That's just not me!!!

 

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NizamPori - women wearing thick yellow thaali, would actually wear low cut tops? I have seen women with the whole bindi, sindhoor etc.. but I always saw them in modest and conservative clothes. It could also be that she was newly married, and according to her community, she has to wear those items for a certain period of time.

Punjabi brides are required to wear their choodas (red/ivory bangles) for one year.. quite a few of my friends have worn it..