How do you get attention on 2 yr old to listen to u while talking

HI,

I felt as if i typed it myself...because even our 27months daughter was same till2ys....not much friends...its just me and her dad.

But she use to focus on what i show her and teach her..might be as i started from her 7thmonth itself....i guess she used to it.But she was very very reversed...but after coming to india, meeting lot of people.now i feel change in her social act.


Now i see change in her activities...she is tricky...talkative...act according to situation./..so main thing for reverseness would be lack of social gathering, as much as possible take hrer to playarea....daycare.... I can understand the situation we have very less people to communicate on day basis...even my condition would be same after i return to india next month.

Regarding focussing..show her one picture on one page kind of books...so that she will not scratter her focus....its takes time./.but you can achieve this in your voice modulation too...just raise and sayl focus on this obeject...once she does...just low your voice and say some thing intereting abou that picutres....


When comintg to communicate its other big challenge to us, but even this can be done with our effect...just for example kid is crying..just ask if needthe toys which is near byher one by one with name ...if she comes to ktichen and cry...just keep asking do you cookies.carrot.fruits one by one ...sure within short they willbe able to point one...or atleast willsay yes or no for your questions...so you can narrow done few items.

We need to talk 50words to get just to get one word from them )) after 3yrs don't worry she will be talking 50words ,,where we willnot have patience to answer their doubts.
All the best.

 

<DD>This is an article that I have saved with me . A lot of points mentioned with help with your query, though the article mainly focuses on discipline.
</DD>
For lack of time, I cannot edit to only address your question, but hope it helps.
<DD>
25 WAYS TO TALK SO YOUR CHILDREN WILL LISTEN

A major part of discipline is learning how to talk with children. The way you talk to your child teaches him how to talk to others. Here are some talking tips we have learned with our children:

1. Connect before you direct
Before giving your child directions, squat to your child's eye level and engage your child in eye-to-eye contact to get his attention. Teach him how to focus: "Mary, I need your eyes." "Billy, I need your ears." Offer the same body language when listening to the child. Be sure not to make your eye contact so intense that your child perceives it as controlling rather than connecting.
2. Address the child
Open your request with the child's name, "Lauren, will you please..."
3. Stay brief
We use the one-sentence rule: Put the main directive in the opening sentence. The longer you ramble, the more likely your child is to become parent-deaf. Too much talking is a very common mistake when dialoging about an issue. It gives the child the feeling that you're not quite sure what it is you want to say. If she can keep you talking she can get you sidetracked.
4. Stay simple
Use short sentences with one-syllable words. Listen to how kids communicate with each other and take note. When your child shows that glazed, disinterested look, you are no longer being understood.
5. Ask your child to repeat the request back to you
If he can't, it's too long or too complicated.
6. Make an offer the child can't refuse
You can reason with a two or three-year-old, especially to avoid power struggles. "Get dressed so you can go outside and play." Offer a reason for your request that is to the child's advantage, and one that is difficult to refuse. This gives her a reason to move out of her power position and do what you want her to do.
7. Be positive
Instead of "no running," try: "Inside we walk, outside you may run."
8. Begin your directives with "I want."
Instead of "Get down," say "I want you to get down." Instead of "Let Becky have a turn," say "I want you to let Becky have a turn now." This works well with children who want to please but don't like being ordered. By saying "I want," you give a reason for compliance rather than just an order.
9. "When...then."
"When you get your teeth brushed, then we'll begin the story." "When your work is finished, then you can watch TV." "When," which implies that you expect obedience, works better than "if," which suggests that the child has a choice when you don't mean to give him one.
10. Legs first, mouth second
Instead of hollering, "Turn off the TV, it's time for dinner!" walk into the room where your child is watching TV, join in with your child's interests for a few minutes, and then, during a commercial break, have your child turn off the TV. Going to your child conveys you're serious about your request; otherwise children interpret this as a mere preference.
11. Give choices
"Do you want to put your pajamas on or brush your teeth first?" "Red shirt or blue one?"
12. Speak developmentally correctly
The younger the child, the shorter and simpler your directives should be. Consider your child's level of understanding. For example, a common error parents make is asking a three-year- old, "Why did you do that?" Most adults can't always answer that question about their behavior. Try instead, "Let's talk about what you did."
13. Speak socially correctly
Even a two-year-old can learn "please." Expect your child to be polite. Children shouldn't feel manners are optional. Speak to your children the way you want them to speak to you.
14. Speak psychologically correctly
Threats and judgmental openers are likely to put the child on the defensive. "You" messages make a child clam up. "I" messages are non-accusing. Instead of "You'd better do this..." or "You must...," try "I would like...." or "I am so pleased when you..." Instead of "You need to clear the table," say "I need you to clear the table." Don't ask a leading question when a negative answer is not an option. "Will you please pick up your coat?" Just say, "Pick up your coat, please."
15. Write it
Reminders can evolve into nagging so easily, especially for preteens who feel being told things puts them in the slave category. Without saying a word you can communicate anything you need said. Talk with a pad and pencil. Leave humorous notes for your child. Then sit back and watch it happen.
16. Talk the child down
The louder your child yells, the softer you respond. Let your child ventilate while you interject timely comments: "I understand" or "Can I help?" Sometimes just having a caring listener available will wind down the tantrum. If you come in at his level, you have two tantrums to deal with. Be the adult for him.
17. Settle the listener
Before giving your directive, restore emotional equilibrium, otherwise you are wasting your time. Nothing sinks in when a child is an emotional wreck.
18. Replay your message
Toddlers need to be told a thousand times. Children under two have difficulty internalizing your directives. Most three- year-olds begin to internalize directives so that what you ask begins to sink in. Do less and less repeating as your child gets older. Preteens regard repetition as nagging.
19. Let your child complete the thought
Instead of "Don't leave your mess piled up," try: "Matthew, think of where you want to store your soccer stuff." Letting the child fill in the blanks is more likely to create a lasting lesson.
20. Use rhyme rules.
"If you hit, you must sit." Get your child to repeat them.
21. Give likable alternatives
You can't go by yourself to the park; but you can play in the neighbor's yard.
22. Give advance notice
"We are leaving soon. Say bye-bye to the toys, bye-bye to the girls…"
23. Open up a closed child
Carefully chosen phrases open up closed little minds and mouths. Stick to topics that you know your child gets excited about. Ask questions that require more than a yes or no. Stick to specifics. Instead of "Did you have a good day at school today?" try "What is the most fun thing you did today?"
24. Use "When you…I feel…because…"
When you run away from mommy in the store I feel worried because you might get lost.
25. Close the discussion
If a matter is really closed to discussion, say so. "I'm not changing my mind about this. Sorry." You'll save wear and tear on both you and your child. Reserve your "I mean business" tone of voice for when you do.
</DD>

 

Hi Suji,

Given your child's age, it is perfectly appropriate for her to lose interest in her activities after a short while.

Ditto for the shyness with strangers.

As for mumbling, use clear directions:

Look at me and tell me what you want.
I didn't understand, tell me again.

Pretend to misunderstand and have her correct you. If she answers in phrases, you say the whole sentence (not too complicated) and ask her to repeat after you. Only then should you give/hand over whatever she wants.

When you give directions-make eye contact. ask her to repeat direction (What do you have to do?)

As for wating to turn the book...that is what a two year old is supposed to do...to perk up her interest use auditory highlighting-like those sports commentators-They change the volume/inflection to draw your attention to tha momnet of the play...similarly raise your voice/whisper/ use a sing song intonation with rhyming words...that is what will draw your attention to the words, not the words themselves.

Rhyming and repeptitive books also offer incidental ways for children to lear new words...if you read a book 10 times, the 11th time she will say the word by pointing to the appropriate picture (not to the word). The key is to work on pre reading skills and not on reading skills at your daughter's age.
R