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How Do You Accept "aging"?

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by anika987, Jun 4, 2020.

  1. nuss

    nuss Finest Post Winner

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    I am 41 and I have no problem accepting it. I have a few gray hair and to me it is just part of growing older. My mom never dyed her hair and now at 75 she has beautiful silvery strands and she looks beautiful!

    I feel more in control of my life now than ever. I don’t really miss 20s. In my 40s I am looking more towards a purpose and contributing to the society. In my 20s I wasn’t really thinking about that. For me, the positives of getting older are endless. I’m a lot more confident in who I am. I’m less worried about what people think of me. There’s a stage in your life when you understand this intellectually but then you reach a stage where you feel this in your heart and I am there.
    Getting old is a privilege, denied to many! I am grateful for a happy, so far healthy 4th decade!
    I hope you find your calling and accept the different seasons of life!
     
  2. nandinimithun

    nandinimithun IL Hall of Fame

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    Ageing is natural but growing old is optional.... I guess its within is to nurture the child within and find joy in the little things in life.
    I just wish and pray that when i am old i should be independent and still be able to do my basic stuff....
    I should not be a burden to anyone....
    Physical aspect i have never bothered too much, though i have dark circles and fine lines, i am comfortable with that....
    Big hugs
    Nandu
     
    Mistt, SunPa, nuss and 2 others like this.
  3. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    One good thing I felt is..slowly many people come Out of the rat race and competitive factors..
     
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  4. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    True..we are more in comfort with who we are:)
     
  5. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    Thanks dear.

    Sometimes I see many people let go of self care.It looks depressing to younger people and scared that they will end up like that.

    When I see older women who dress well and have a lovely happy smile..it feels wonderful that they look so content and confident and the fear diminishes.

    I think it is the older people’s responsibility to give confidence to age for the younger generation:)
     
  6. Needtobestrong

    Needtobestrong Gold IL'ite

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    I’m not as old as you Anika but many times I reflect on my past like teens and early twenties and brood over fast time passes and how as we grow older have more responsibilities etc..
    Ive not been subjected to such age related comments as you’ve faced, but it’s just my insecurity sometimes ..
    I do get pissed off when I’m unable to lose weight easily...when I was in school and college I could lose weight by doing excercise and just cutting down junk and this did not require much effort on my part.
    Slowing metabolism and lower energy levels is something that irritates me..
    Doesn’t help when I see what problems are faced by older generation and I get scared and feel like I have to maintain good health always so I can face challenges of future..
    After many years of marriage, adjusting with marriage, in laws and facing ups and downs of family life , relationship issues, insecurities regarding career, and I sometimes get overwhelmed by the monotony of domestic chores and this lockdown and Covid19 crisis has drained me out of all positivity and I’m feeling older...
    There is nothing like twenties and thirties I agree..
    Young age is young age when you look good naturally without much effort...
    But 40s is hopefully an ok time for most ladies when your kids are older and you have time for yourself..20s and 30s were probably dedicated to pregnancy, childbirth, sleepless nights, running behind naughty toddlers , primary school , with a couple of career breaks for marriage, kids etc...by now kids would be independent..many would have reached a middle level position in work and earning decently..
    And parents and in laws wouldn’t be so old as to require round the clock medical care...
    Health issues would be somewhat manageable in the 40s..
    I don’t think older generation has it much easier , either...
    People of 50s and 60s have it much worse, Heath issues, education and marriage of grown up children, career in pre retirement state, saving for future, and many have
    Very aged parents in 80s and elderly care would really drain them out financially, physically and mentally...and many are already attending to deliveries of daughters and DILs, and happily babysitting grandkid’s too..
    Every stage of life has its challenges..
     
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  7. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    Hmm true..life is always challenging but we all should try our best I guess:)

    You are doing your best and regards your weight loss goals..don’t give up!
    You will achieve your dream some day!
    All the best..
     
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  8. netflx

    netflx Silver IL'ite

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    There are a few things like aging, loss of parents/elderly loved ones, these all bring their own difficulties and challenges (health or loss of elders in family etc). The thing we can do is try to stay fit and eat healthy and good habits, rest happens as it is meant to happen.
     
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  9. hermitcrab

    hermitcrab Platinum IL'ite

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    True @anika987, many people leave the rat race for make time for 'just being'.
     
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  10. hermitcrab

    hermitcrab Platinum IL'ite

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    Age is just a number?! hmmm...I do not think so! If it were, we would be employing 10 years old to clean houses in India and US- why all the fight against 'bal majdoori'/child labor?!

    Age is not just a number, age is real. But one should keep their wits about them, and accept aging and missed goals/desires. It is okay to realize that not everything can be achieved, as we wanted. But it is not wrong to 'have set out to achieve' at age 20- in the first place. It is not wrong to be get into the rat race, when we are young. Youth of 20-40, makes very significant contribution to society. As they age, they age they get more seasoned and start deciding on a different goal. I feel, nature has to do more with the way we think (in each seasons of life), not necessarily our own wisdom.

    There's another angle to aging to US. Many immigrants are stuck in the time when they left the country of origin. If they are able to be a part of active immigrant group (read girl gang), then it is easier for them to take aging as they must. But if they are not working outside home, or not a part of very active peer-immigrant group, then the whole aging goes amiss. It is hard to age solitarily, when aging is so relative!!

    There are few things I have decided for my aging:
    Keep dressing, as I want. No fat-clothes for me.
    Dye my hair when I see enough greys.
    Stop dyeing my hair abruptly- when I want. Let people deal with it.
    Contribute to society, where I can.
    Takecare of myself.
    Enjoy company of people I love.
    Unburden myself of bad company.


    To the very young, in 20s:
    Don't waste your time in bad company.
    Plan out your life. And then work the plan.
    Stop wasting your time to pluck your eyebrows and upper lips, endlessly- everyone now, is nearsighted!!
    Stop wasting time in finding perfect anything (clothes, car, spouse, ..) if something doesn't work, go very quickly to next one.
    Perfection is in the eyes of beholder. What is short spouse for someone, is perfect for someone else- just do not your precious time.
    Learn a skill, that transcends age, decades- e.g. singing, classical singing, being a doctor
    Pay attention to your number age, and where are you in life. Do not leave the peer-group, they propel you forward.
    Do not leave your country, for another country. You will never miss another country when you are 40.
    Make do with what you have, don't have bottomless appetite for material things.
    Always include faith and nature in life.
    Raise your children when you are young- if you can. You will have their company for longer.
    Have few people, at least one person who can teach you from their own experience. Many old people do not want to share their failures, but most important lessons are 'what not to do'!
     
    Needtobestrong and anika987 like this.

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