how do u handle gossips

shonb · Oct 31, 2012

generally when friends gossip about u how do u handle those gossips.

GodIsOne · Oct 31, 2012

First and foremost, they will disappear from my friends list. I wouldn't bother asking them about it but would keep the relationship little formal from then on.

Radhai · Oct 31, 2012

shonb said: ↑

generally when friends gossip about u how do u handle those gossips.
Click to expand...

Suggestion: keep away from the one that gossiped about you AND the messenger* who brought the gossip to your notice.

* - assuming messenger is an aquaintance and not your close friend

funbee · Oct 31, 2012

If they are real good firends whould not talk behind you (Gossip)...So now you know they are not good friends
or they can't be trusted any more...Thanks God for giving you this chance to know about these people..
Move on. there is no need to clarify anything ..don't stress yourself about it.whatever is the issue or gossip let them waste their time talking about it ..you should just move on

shonb · Oct 31, 2012

you know i can't sleep and i loose my peace because of this.the reason for this gossip is purely jealousy.sometimes it is so stressful that we forget our main problems and start to worry about this small problems.i have to meet daily this person who gossips about me.

shonb · Oct 31, 2012

thanks all for ur replies

veeramachaneni · Oct 31, 2012

Just listen and ignore. That's what I do. If I don't listen or try to educate them that what they are doing is wrong I will be their next topic. I don't want tat to happen. So I smile I listen and I don't say a word and I try to change the topic or I say " I understand , that must be so hard on you. Leave her topic. It is better if we don't give that much importance to others...etc" Always works for me.

Also I have a golden rule I follow 85% of the "I don't follow it with my DH/Mom/Dad/Bro"

The Rule Being "If you don't have anything nice to say don't say it"

shonb · Nov 1, 2012

well said. I will also try.

veeramachaneni said: ↑

Just listen and ignore. That's what I do. If I don't listen or try to educate them that what they are doing is wrong I will be their next topic. I don't want tat to happen. So I smile I listen and I don't say a word and I try to change the topic or I say " I understand , that must be so hard on you. Leave her topic. It is better if we don't give that much importance to others...etc" Always works for me.

Also I have a golden rule I follow 85% of the "I don't follow it with my DH/Mom/Dad/Bro"

The Rule Being "If you don't have anything nice to say don't say it"
Click to expand...

JustMyself · Nov 3, 2012

In my opinion, I like the way my DH handles these 'idle- talks'. He calls both the person, and asks the gossiper in front of the messenger about what was passed on. This way, he creates the situation to address the issue. According to him, the messenger also would not want to be part of another idle gossip, as he would not like to be put on the spot.
Well, it works for him !!

My motto, ignore gossip totally. Try not to be a party of it. Change the topic and move on to something else if the situation demands.

bharatchowdhary · Nov 4, 2012

JustMySelf's policy is good. If you don't have option but have to continue friendship, just create a virtual character and imply all that gossipping behaviour to that character and scold the character like anything...ego satisfied....