I spoke to my in-laws yesterday through FaceTime and all was going good.Suddenly she was giving some positive advice and used the word how one should not be “selfish”..I got wildly triggered by the word. For my relatives and in-laws over the years I have been nice and always been helpful but I always felt taken for granted and advantage.The word selfish triggered me big time and felt I did not deserve it. I suddenly lost control over myself and before I could think I lashed out.I told how I was to them and how they differentiate between me and co sister and how she gets her things done etc. my in-laws said their conscience is clear and they never differentiated and perception of truth is different etc and burst out crying. honestly..I felt I can never get my closure and people either will resort to emotional blackmail or they will not accept. I felt blank. My only guilt is Why I lost control all Of a sudden and made elderly people cry..why I did not control my triggers.. how do I forgive myself for being rude to elders..