How Do Homemakers Spend Time In Usa?

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by anika987, Dec 12, 2019.

  1. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    I was actively searching for a job coz I needed a “change” in my life.Nothing proper worked out until now.Got one but the commute/salary/timings did not work for our family.Have to drop it sadly:( and so taking a break till new year and will start my search again.

    I do have work at home,keep busy,have my hobbies,kids activities etc but life is getting monotonous.

    I am not the only homemaker in IL living in USA.I feel there are some IL ladies who are homemakers with adult kids.

    How do you manage?
    How do you keep yourself motivated?
    How do you spend time as in apart from The housework?

    My mind craves a change.Have you felt this way and how do you deal?

    Why specifically I meant USA or even other countries coz in India we have so many distractions.
     
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  2. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    Sigh. How long have you been in the US? Yes, family/salary are two big constraints. Timings are standard unless it is a startup venture. My 2 cents - It does get depressing especially when you are dependent and don't have a car. Take some online courses and work on them. Go to gym during free time. Adopt some hobbies. Try hard to get a job. It is doubly frustrating because you are an immigrant and getting hold of someone to talk to from your community is not easy. Just keep your mind on positive and useful thoughts. Finally, don't fight with spouse over job search, it is not useful to go to a job which has bad commute and no convenient timings. It is not like India where people are okay with 1-2 hour commute. Definitely, do not think of staying away from your spouse for job, some men absolutely hate the idea. You might want to discuss all this before hand. Salary depends on your spouse, if you can convince him that you will work on a raise then do that. If your spouse is okay with shelling some money, go to a consultant and get a job. They will do everything to land you a job, they won't pay you well though. But for a starter it might be a good option. If you are okay with studying, try taking courses at the local university - again this is an option you might consider if you have the motivation and have money to spend on the course.
     
  3. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi am here for more than a decade and I have worked before kid for four to five years.After child was born ,I quit.

    Now when kiddo is getting older..I need a bit of change in routine.

    Been searching for six months..all giving full time job with peanut salary (don’t blame them) but I don’t get any help from hubby coz of his crazy timings.

    I am looking for a part time and if only it was that easy!

    Half the time school is off with closing days,staff meetings,Dec holidays,spring breaks,sudden closing due to weather etc etc and it won’t make sense to pay for the daycares for the amount I make.
    So taken a break from job search until new year and will start again as of Jan 1st.

    Are you working outside or a homemaker?
     
    Last edited: Dec 12, 2019
  4. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    Currently, I am working. It hasn't been easy for me either. I don't know which industry you work for. Getting a part-time in software is definitely not easy, and I don't even know if it's practical, even if one gets, I don't think their pay will be good enough. I understand your issues. Can you take the help of parents or in-laws? How old are your kids? What is your visa status? I would say in any case, keep trying, don't give up. There are many women who find it difficult after kids are born.
     
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  5. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Thank you for replying.My kid is 7.When does it get easier without aftercare and beforecare
     
  6. Amulet

    Amulet IL Hall of Fame

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    Once they have their own car you will replace physical runaround with mental anguish. That will go on until your brain gives out. Children are forever.
     
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  7. KavithaUS

    KavithaUS Silver IL'ite

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    Anika, If you want to break through into a corporate career, please consider childcare spend as an investment. It will pay in itself through your career experience and progression. The workforce experience is invaluable. And good childcare will keep you sane in those unforeseen circumstances(snow day, half day etc) and establish your credibility at work.
    I know it is very tough, I have done it for 2 kids with (<1.5 yrs in age difference) with a meager salary. My husband's paycheck helped me in covering the costs for those years. We were running our household in net loss.
    Could our bank balance stay stable for those 5 years? No.
    Did I make up for the monetary loss? Yes, pay multiplied with each progression.

    Don't give up. Jump in.
     
  8. SunPa

    SunPa Platinum IL'ite

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    So true!
     
  9. KavithaUS

    KavithaUS Silver IL'ite

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    Never. Challenges take different turns, but they never go away. Once you are a parent, you stay as parents forever.
     
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  10. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    haha, to some extent that is true, but legally, after 12 yrs, they can stay alone in the house, not before that. @anika987, in this regard, my kids' school doesn't have as many breaks, recently both moved to a new school, but even that school has after school program, and they don't have too many holidays. I don't know where you live, but you may want to find such a school. My in-laws also live with us. But the school itself doesn't have that many breaks.
     
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