How Did You All Manage Your Baby Alone

Discussion in 'Post Pregnancy Care' started by Meenu1991, Nov 24, 2017.

  1. Meenu1991

    Meenu1991 Bronze IL'ite

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    My baby will be 5 months old by dec and i will have to manage my son all alone in a different city. Currently me and my mom manage him, bathe him etc. He is a very tough kid, never sleeps during the day. Its difficult to make him sleep. After swaddling him for sometime he falls asleep and sleeps for max half an hour. Day time passes like this and only at nights he sleeps properly.
    Am really worried how am going to manage him alone cause he cries a lot. My hubby leaves early to work and comes late. I will have to manage everything alone. Though i might have a maid for washing vessels, sweeping etc. Still am worried if he will cry a lot and i will be helpless at some point.
    I would like if you all give me some hope that i will be able to do it alone by telling your experiences :)
     
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  2. momsky

    momsky Gold IL'ite

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    I’m sure everything will turn out fine. The thought of doing it all by yourself is very daunting at first but eventually it will be the norm and a piece of cake for you. My children were born in 2004, 2007, and 2008 and I took care of them all by myself. I’m not a domestic goddess as well, so I’m just amazed how I survived those years. So many fond memories, one picture in my head was my eldest sliding on the stairs, my second son on top of the dining table all at the same time while I was carrying my few months old daughter. I was so mad at them but they just laughed it off.

    Another funny thing was when I went out to do some Christmas shopping.. after 30 minutes, my husband ( ex now), called and asked me to come back home . When I asked why, he said 1 son was holding on to his left leg while the other son was holding on to his other leg, while he was carrying our daughter.. they were all crying and and he didn’t know what to do..:roflmao:
     
  3. ashneys

    ashneys Platinum IL'ite

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    My grandma was with me for about two months teaching the whole bathing, feeding, taking care stuff, as I was only 21 when I had my child. After learning that I have been taking care of him alone with some help from hubby.

    I had a part timer for house cleaning, she also used to chop veggies n stuff, n I did the cooking.
    On top your household help, You can hire a part time cook as well.
    Or even a live in help if you are worried.

    My focus was only on my child, I slept with him, got up with him. I barely used to sleep 2-3 hours at a stretch regardless of morning or night as he used to sleep only for that time at a stretch. He used to cry for feeding or wetting. N I will be doing all that even in the middle of the night as the day or night made no difference for him.

    My dh used to go off early n come back late too. It was only my son n me for the whole day. I used to talk a lot with him, play, make funny noise, listen to music, even watch movies. God knows what he understood but we did a lot stuff together like this because I think we kinda entertained each other n not get bored or annoyed.

    Though my hubby was always supportive n tried to help me as much as he can, it was still only so much compared to how much I had to do. Because the hours he was home itself was limited.

    Weekends, hubby helped during the day time n I used to catch up on some sleep, but eventually I got used to the 2-3 hours sleep.

    All this coming from a person who used to sleep for 12 hours straight n never lifted a plate at my birth home. But motherhood can really change us n make us realize the inner power that we never knew existed.

    Babies cry, one more than another, it's the only way they can communicate. Just try to figure their need. If the child sleeps only for 30 mins at a stretch during the day, it's fine. Play with him n cuddle n all. No matter what, don't feel overwhelmed, when you do, even the simplest thing will look so difficult. If you are in the mindset to handle it, even the worst tantrums can be handled so easily.

    So don't be scared of taking care of your child alone. It's your child, no one can care or understand him/ her more than you do. Before you know it, you will get the hang of it n handle the situation so much better than you think you will.
     
  4. Amica

    Amica IL Hall of Fame

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    :lol: Cute!
     
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  5. MonikaSG

    MonikaSG Platinum IL'ite

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    My baby also used to cry a lot. Few things that helped me were the baby cradle and the chair. When baby is sleepy put him on cradle and swing till the time they get the proper nap. It really helped me as otherwise he used to cry whenever I put him on bed to sleep. I had another baby when the first one was 1 and half year old. I was too scared while my second pregnancy that what will I do when he will also cry the same. This time I will have 2 babies to handle at that situation. But god helped me and my second baby was too quiet and used to sleep for long. I too handled both of them single handed. Tough time it was. Now also they are not too old but still they play together and I can finish my households at least.
     
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  6. Meenu1991

    Meenu1991 Bronze IL'ite

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    OMG amazing
    Am struggling with one kid itself and you have single-handedly managed three kids.
    Hats off to you.
    Yeah i think even am being very paranoid now. But hopefully i learn to manage him well :)
     
  7. Meenu1991

    Meenu1991 Bronze IL'ite

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    Thank you ashneys :)
    You are absolutely right. I do become overwhelmed sometimes and get a very bad temper when am not able to console his cries.
    Great tips by the way. I will definitely try to follow them.
    He is a very light sleeper, even a small sound would wake him up.
    So i guess partially am worried about that a lot, cause here my mom would try to put him back to sleep, which am still yet to master.
    Hoping things will improve over time :)
    Thank you sharing your experience.
     
  8. Meenu1991

    Meenu1991 Bronze IL'ite

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    Even am thankful to the cradle, my baby sleeps only in the cradle and never on bed. But he will also become wide awake easily and starts speaking to the window and tube lights in the room. :shakehead:
    Handling kids along with household chores is the tough part. Here at my mom's place, when mom is busy managing household chores, i take care of him, and once she is done, we both take care.
     
  9. Ineedhelp1

    Ineedhelp1 Bronze IL'ite

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    Trust me you will be able to manage as you go. Here are some tips and tricks from my experience.

    1. Try to stick to same schedule.
    2. Same time nap, bath, breakfast, lunch, dinner & snacks. (You can get sample online).
    3. Count minimum 30-45 minutes to make them eat and get into sleep. May be eventually you will be able to do it in 15-30 minutes but not every time.
    4. There will be good days and bad days. Baby will eat, sleep and everything on time. Some days will be dedicated to crankiness. It is very normal. Don't get upset or tensed. After all they are babies. We elders can't behave every day in a same manner!
    5. Make sure they get enough sleep in the morning. If they wake up without proper sleep then pretty sure it is going to be a cranky day!
    6. If you like music, create a good mombaby playlist. It will give a soothing experience.
    7. Check for Mothers club and Library around you. You will get other moms who are in the same boat. It will be good to share and care.
    8. Try to take a 30 minutes 'me ' time every day. Just you only. It will help you to charge yourself.

    Funny part is by the time you figure out their first stage they will get into second stage.:roflmao:

    I was worried like you but now I am managing my DD, household & job. It is like riding roller coaster everyday but you will learn to survive when that is the only way to go! Take care :)
     
    Last edited: Nov 26, 2017
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  10. Daffodil13

    Daffodil13 Silver IL'ite

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    Hi Meenu,

    how are u and LO dear...? Dont worry , I am in the same boat..
    My mom assisted me for the first 3 months and due to some personal reasons, my mom had to leave to native.
    I cant go to native as my DD has school here...so I had to manage both kids all alone...

    I have hired a cook , which made things easier for me. My hubby helps in handling DD till she goes school.
    My LO is also very light sleeper and wakes up easily for very small sounds...I know it is very irritating. I cant take even 30 mins nap in day time becoz of his sleep pattern..He doesnt sleep for more than 30-40 mins in a stretch and I will some other household stuff in that time...I was so tired and drained out in initial 10-15 days but trust me , you will soon get used to new routine. Now I dont feel tired...:)

    Time and situations teach us everything dear...You will surely manage. As everyone said, it might look very difficult for the initial days and soon you will hang over it.

    Things which helped to some extent:

    1. I hired a cook. I have maid already.
    2. I got cradle and Baby rocker...I put him to sleep in cradle, even though he sleeps for 30-40 mins. He doesnt sleep on bed. I put him in baby rocker for atleast 30 mins in a day when I go for some household work.
    3. I know its not a very good idea to start rhymes at this early age, but on very cranky days I put some rhymes and baby songs. He watches them for sometime...
    4. If he is very cranky, I take him for 10 mins walk outside and he will be fine.

    Of all above, the best thing that works for me is my DD. My DD makes him playful and occupies him for sometime..
     
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