1. How to Build Positivity in Married Life? : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice
  2. What can you teach someone online? Tell us here!
    Dismiss Notice
  3. If someone taught you via skype, what would you want to learn? Tell us here!
    Dismiss Notice

Her Husband Says Don't Wear Shoes At Home

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Rihana, Apr 8, 2020.

  1. Rihana

    Rihana Finest Post Winner

    Messages:
    10,040
    Likes Received:
    24,883
    Trophy Points:
    540
    Gender:
    Female
    Chatted with a friend after two weeks. Funny problem has cropped up between husband and wife thanks to WFH.

    W has had ankle surgery some years ago and one foot keeps bothering her now and then. They have a huge house with tiles downstairs and upstairs I think most rooms have carpet. She's always been a SAHM, kids now home from college. Due to the foot problem, she wears comfortable shoes with laces at home (even with salwar kameez or nightie). These are strictly indoors shoes and I've seen she doesn't wear them even a few steps outside the door like when saying bye to friends.

    H doesn't approve of anyone wearing shoes inside the house, so in the evenings and weekend she used to wear the fluffy slippers kind. Now, with everybody at home, she is on her feet all day cooking, cleaning and what not. Her foot is really hurting. I told her to wear the shoes and her H will understand.

    The poor woman is in pain but I found the situation funny. How can two people with adult children disagree on something so basic. Her H doesn't explicitly stop her, but she can tell that he disapproves. : ) Like, he will pause conversation with son when he hears the sound of her shoes and she coming into the room, and will look at the shoes before resuming conversation. : )

    Anyway, I told her she better start wearing the shoes and avoid having to go to the doctor in this Covid time. I thought why her H has to be such an ass! Wouldn't physical comfort and care matter more than practices we grew up following!

    Which makes me wonder - do you wear footwear in the house? I wear super comfortable ones that I used to get from India. Running out of that stock.
     
    Last edited: Apr 8, 2020
    Loading...

  2. joylokhi

    joylokhi Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,397
    Likes Received:
    1,989
    Trophy Points:
    285
    Gender:
    Female
    I started wearing slippers inside the house since last ten years or so, after I returned from my first US visit and stay of around 3 to 4 months. I found that due to the carpeted floors there, my problem of cracked heals was solved miraculously which all the treatment and creams I had hither to tried not working. In addition now that I am getting on in years- 66 now, feel wearing slippers has definitely taken the strain of the standing and cooking etc from the legs very much. I feel, as long as the footwear is used strictly for indoors only and avoided in puja room or so, there should be no issue.
     
    Amica, SinghManisha, Amulet and 3 others like this.
  3. SunPa

    SunPa Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    904
    Likes Received:
    2,045
    Trophy Points:
    263
    Gender:
    Female
    Not regularly.. I had plantar fascitis last year and the wearing the vionic slippers with arch support was a bliss. Wore them for 2-3 months. I dont feel very comfortable to wear them all the time. So when the pain got better I stopped . Also during those days I have leg cramps, I used to wear them. I live in a tropical country so no winter issues


    This is so true. If one is standing more than 20 mins ata stretch few times a day, then footwear will save us leg issues in the long run.


    I dont get it why the difference between slippers and shoes... I mean the so called issue with wearing footwear or being bare footed is the cleanliness part. One would wash feet at least a couple of times a day , and shower so feet would be cleaner. Also when one is bare footed , you will feel the dust/grime etc on the sole and so easier to know that it is time to clean. But one needs to make a conscious effort to clean indoor foot wear on that frequent basis.
    Anything else?

    Classic example of "passive aggressive" behaviour

    smh...
    It is time for your friend to put her well shod feet down :)
     
    Amica, SinghManisha and joylokhi like this.
  4. ashneys

    ashneys Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,174
    Likes Received:
    2,460
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Female
    If it was me, if he stares at my shoes mid conversation like dat.. I would give dh a Wide smile n probably do a few air kicks n go on about.
    if we give so much importance to every look and word of spouse n family, we literally can’t live, at all. Sometimes it’s ok to shrug and do what we want. She’s in pain, it’s harming no one else. He’s just being dramatic and doesn’t care about what she’s going through.
     
  5. Angela123

    Angela123 Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    468
    Likes Received:
    629
    Trophy Points:
    173
    Gender:
    Female
    I wear house slippers because the tiles in kitchen and even wood floor is cold in winter. We all wear the fluffy house slippers, I was not a big fan but keeping foot warm is important and it could lead to some issues (I had sort of uneasy cramp my whole leg the two winter when I was not wearing these). i dont use them outside.

    Your friend should show the courage to put on the shoes and relieve the physical pain even if her husband despises it.
     
    Amica, Giri12 and mindwar like this.
  6. Minion

    Minion Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    479
    Likes Received:
    511
    Trophy Points:
    173
    Gender:
    Male
    The looking will stop only if she removes the shoe once and hits him till he understands the meaning of pain.
    [​IMG]
     
    shama146 and SinghManisha like this.
  7. SinghManisha

    SinghManisha Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,011
    Likes Received:
    2,670
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Female
    The husband is (a) nick ( with a capital D , not Jonas )
     
    Amica likes this.
  8. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    277
    Likes Received:
    366
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    As long as they aren't worn outside, why should it matter? She should tell him that it was based on doctor's recommendation, he can't let her suffer like that. And it's not at all funny. For someone with heel pain, I can understand how much it must be hurting her. I too don't like people wearing footwear in the house especially the prayer room - just for vanity's sake, not for comfort or anything. But this case is different, the poor woman is in pain.
     
    Amica likes this.

Share This Page