Discussion in 'Life Without Spouse' started by EagerForInfo, Mar 6, 2023.
How to record the abuse. ??
This is a major life decision. It takes thought and planning before proceeding with divorce. That is the reason for the posts. After all we don’t come in contact with divorced people to know what the life is like.
I’m just confused. As this is not planned. Or expected. But I do want to get out of this hell. But when we’re leaning towards that suddenly u remember the days he is good and start wondering wait … was it just a bad day ? Or were the good days all fake.
It just doesn’t make sense. WHY WOULD A PERSON BEHAVE THIS WAY ?? Am I misunderstanding. Was it something I did ? Didn’t do ? My kids shouldn’t have to pay for a mistake I did. .
Things like that.
Yes like one of the responses mentioned unless you are in our shoes u won’t know the confusion and panic we’re going through.
One thing I agree on is his behavior in s wrong. No matter what the reason is.
But it is hard to believe a person “could” behave this way.
Did you go for the therapy and counselling and if possible medicine as suggested multiple times by multiple members.
if not , you are just wasting time and adding more pages to this POST.
Such men do exist . He is not going to change. Are you really financially independent.?
What's stopping you from calling 911 when he hits you?
Above post is from a woman in H4 EAD in US.
Every single comment said her to call 911 and put his sorry ass in jail.
Consult attorney. They will help you.
In my case also he is saying I’m provoking him. I never said anything wrong. Last time it was about kids tv. I asked them to turn it off. He came running down saying I’m provoking him. When I said my words are not words that would provoke someone unless under the influence of drugs he also beat me brutally for 30 minutes chasing me around the house. Is this a disorder or something.
Another reason I feel confused is he is a people person. We live close to numerous cousins of his. They all say he is a great person and I have never heard one complaint about him. If I hint at abuse they look at me and remind me I’m an outsider.
So again u start wondering is it a one time or a bad day kind of thing.
Yes I am sorry for adding on to this post. But this is an important decision to make.
He is a great dad too .
Seems like his only problem is with me.
I just don’t get it.
even if its one time it is big crime to hurt anyone. You said you are US citizen and earning. Why are you taking this abuse. God forbid if he hit you harder next time and you become bedridden who will take care of you and your kids? When husband provoke does wife hit husband? You should have gone to doctor or keep some record for your case.
Did your kid watch it? I am very sorry for your situation. Build courage and don't take any non sense from anyone.
Are you asking this question for real?
can you please go for a therapist (WHO is specialist in ) narcissistic personality disorder - living with a NPD . and pyschiatrist for medication .
can you please do that.
just do it. you are clearly under trauma bonding. that is why nothing or no advise makes sense for you. You are just living under a fake reality.
PLEASE JUST BOOK APPOINTMENT.
OP , PLEASE BOOK APPOINTMENT.
ALL this advise is very very good. But it will not make any sense when you are in that fog , truama bonding state.
do not spend time online. there is not new words you will get. Do not delay you might end up hurting yourself in some dangerous ways.