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H Travelling To India On Urgent

Discussion in 'General Discussions - USA & Canada' started by sanjuruby3, Apr 12, 2021.

  1. sanjuruby3

    sanjuruby3 Gold IL'ite

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    My H family ( Parents + brother family everyone) contracted covid in india and all are sick. FIL situation is very critical and in ICU. My H applied from urgent visa and wants to go for month or so.
    And I do not know how will i manage with kids here. Older one has school and younger one is at home. We were thinking to put him daycare soon but now is not the right time as he will get sick first time for sure and again alone, it will be hard. Also, we are not able to find any nanny. Our previous nanny had quit for covid- safety reasons.

    Can i bring my parents here? It is long trip for them and hence more exposure. Plus it will take some time, to pack, tickets, bring them for airport, quarantine, jetlag, if they arrive safelyor not ..they take precautions or not while travelling. Its another risk.

    We had tried nannies earlier also but were not able to find. Moreover, our friends family had got virus from asymptomatic nanny.
    One week i can take off but he is thinking 5-6 weeks.
    He has one more brother living in different city. They also have not gone to parents family home yet. As they can not help the situation but will increase workload and with big family, hard to quarantine.
    I do not know what to do. I understand his situation and worried about my situation also.
    What can he do for 5-6 weeks?
    We all can go and i can live at my parents house. But just last year, we had gone to india and was stuck there for 4-5 months. My work suffered a lot and my kids also. Older ones classes.. ( will not go details here) but i do not know if my employer will be happy again, and working from India is not easy. Then with current flights situation, do not want again to be stranded.

    So far, we are not thinking to go and exposing kids again.

    Do not know how to handle the situation.
     
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  2. MalStrom

    MalStrom IL Hall of Fame

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    Did your parents get vaccinated? If they got all their doses then you could think of bringing them. Are people allowed to travel in tourist visa now? Make sure you get proper medical insurance in case of emergency.
    Is your husband vaccinated? What’s his plan if he gets sick? My cousin went to India recently for the last days of their parent but they did not have Covid so they were able to manage by wearing masks. If everyone in your husband’s family is positive then it’s very likely he will also get it if he stays with them. Just be careful.
     
    Last edited: Apr 12, 2021
  3. KavithaUS

    KavithaUS Silver IL'ite

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    Take a deep breath.

    Don't travel to India as it will take a professional hit as you stated. In your case, going by past posts, your work is key to sustain financial independence.
    Daycare is your best bet. I understand you are concerned with younger kids 'possibly' getting sick. Managing sick kid alone is 'hard', however, not impossible. Kids are resilient, so are the moms. In the USA, there are many single moms handling work, home, and kids. Single moms- either due to their marital status or to their spouses out of home for varied reasons.

    Get outside help for cleaning. It is an unfortunate situation with your in-laws health...but I see it as a blessing in disguise for you to bond with your older one without your DH presence in the country. Use this 5 - 6 week to bond with your older one as you will be the only parent she would have to navigate at home and look up to. An opportunity to get things in order at home front.

    It can be done, take it in your stride.
     
    chanchitra and deepthyanoop like this.
  4. ProudIndian

    ProudIndian Gold IL'ite

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    Why don’t u take one month vacation from your office? This is family emergency so good excuse for you to relax little bit with your kids.
     
  5. MalStrom

    MalStrom IL Hall of Fame

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    Does your company offer FMLA? Now would be a good time to take it.
     
  6. sanjuruby3

    sanjuruby3 Gold IL'ite

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    I did not know FMLA i can take for such emergencies.
    My company is good in this way that can give me 1-2 weeks. But more than that would be embarrassing to ask. Alone with kids will not be relaxing.
    Also, last year I took lot of time off because of covid/stuck situation. Now each month i take few days off for kids as younger one is home.
    I am also scared for my performance appraisals , not targeting for promotion but comments and feedback :-(
     
  7. DDream

    DDream Platinum IL'ite

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    If your husband has got vaccine, its ok for him to travel. If not, its risky and he may get covid once he starts contact with his family members.

    You can consider sending your kids to daycare if you have already got vaccine. I got vaccine so I am sending my kids back to school. But they follow covid protocols in school

    If your parents havent received any vaccine, its too risky to bring them here. Many old people I know died after the second wave.

    I wont suggest you to travel to India now. There is a great chance for lockdown due to increased cases there. You may get trapped there. If you want to visit India, make sure to get vaccinated before the travel date.

    I know its difficult to manage everything alone. But if you plan well you can do it.
    If you havent got vaccine, contact local pharmacy ( Walmart / walgreens /family clinic), they may contact you in case of cancellations.
     
    Ragavisang likes this.
  8. nuss

    nuss Platinum IL'ite

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    My H family ( Parents + brother family everyone) contracted covid in india and all are sick. FIL situation is very critical and in ICU. My H applied from urgent visa and wants to go for a month or so.

    If your father-in-law is in critical condition, I believe that your husband should go. Otherwise, he will regret his whole life that he could have gone but he didn't. It is best for his mental peace!


    And I do not know how will i manage with kids here. Older one has school and younger one is at home. We were thinking to put him daycare soon but now is not the right time as he will get sick first time for sure and again alone, it will be hard. Also, we are not able to find any nanny. Our previous nanny had quit for covid- safety reasons.

    If you can find a daycare, please enroll him. He might get sick and might not-- hard to predict! All daycares/ preschools are taking all necessary precautions!

    Can i bring my parents here? It is long trip for them and hence more exposure. Plus it will take some time, to pack, tickets, bring them for airport, quarantine, jetlag, if they arrive safelyor not ..they take precautions or not while travelling. Its another risk.

    Can you? Maybe, it! Given their visa/ residency status they might be able to travel. They will have to take all precautions during travel. But think about it, it will be a long, arduous journey for your old parents with masks for over 24 h and covid tests in India and in the USA. How much help will they be able to provide?

    One week i can take off but he is thinking 5-6 weeks.

    If you can manage during one week of leave and get everything in place- kids school routine, daycare for the little one, meals for a few days, etc. you will be able to get through 4-5 weeks!

    I do not know what to do. I understand his situation and worried about my situation also.
    What can he do for 5-6 weeks?

    Instead of going for 5-6 weeks, can your DH go for 2 weeks? Spend time with his parents, meet with healthcare providers and come back? There is not much he can do. If things appear to be bad, he can extend his trip otherwise return after a few days.

    We all can go and i can live at my parents house. But just last year, we had gone to india and was stuck there for 4-5 months. My work suffered a lot and my kids also. Older ones classes.. ( will not go details here) but i do not know if my employer will be happy again, and working from India is not easy. Then with current flights situation, do not want again to be stranded.

    Taking kids on a long trip will be hard. You might just stay with the kids and manage here. Let your DH go.
     
    Ragavisang, chanchitra and Angela123 like this.
  9. sanjuruby3

    sanjuruby3 Gold IL'ite

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    So far, we are still on standby. He could not get tourist visa to India, and will take some time. It got rejected and need father's medical condition proof. With everyone in chaos there, it is still on hold.
    Do not know what his mind thinks. 2 weeks I can manage i think.

    My parents are vaccinated and will be of big help but its too long journey for them, from place they have to come it is too long. Few years ago, they came, they kind of gave up, and its too hard for them, and they literally said, this time we give up, as my dad never complains, that time he did.
     
  10. MalStrom

    MalStrom IL Hall of Fame

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    I thought you had OCI. They can travel easily but Tourists are not allowed right now. You might want to apply and try to get a visa just in case. Hopefully your in-laws would have recovered by then.
     

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