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Golden Rules for every woman

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Shanthi, Mar 31, 2007.

  1. lathakishore

    lathakishore Junior IL'ite

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    hi shanthi,

    i am married for 4 and halhf years....i got wisdom 6 months back :) :) that i should not rome around him and i should have my own world. but one thing is your last point .
    ''
    13. If you feel that your husband is not taking care of the kids and you are overloaded just drop everything and 'become' sick for a day. You will be surprised how well your husband can take care of things around the house. They are just lazy and know that they have a choice. If they don't do it you will. But when you crash he will rise to the occasion. This is 100% true. Everything has to be learnt. Soon your kid may want dad for certain things and you will be more relieved''


    i heard this from few people, but he dont care my health ever and ever,, and if he is not ok with health i should pamper him like a kid...after delivery of my ds i got severe typoid in first month of baby, my dh is asking my mom that is this effect his son or not without concerning about me.....i have sooo many tough times with him regarding my health ..........,he too changed a bit but still in this area he doesnot...

    and you told that go and kiss, he never fell happy and invite if i myself go to him, he reject s me in very deplomatic way....if he got intereset then only ...

    i am strenghten myself with his behavior...now if he show some concern towards me my mind couldnt receive it ...but am acting a
    lot which is giving a great peace.....

    wanted to share..even am cool...shower if any tips in my case
     
    Last edited: Dec 3, 2011
  2. Mrudhani

    Mrudhani Silver IL'ite

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    Hi Shanti,
    I am totally impressed and comvinced with all your points. I have given you my "like" but i seriously prefer giving 13 likes for all ur 13 points !!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  3. Shanthi

    Shanthi Silver IL'ite

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    Hi,
    I am sorry for the late reply. I am not as active in the forum as I would like to be. Thank you for your comments. Now lets get to the point.

    About your hubby not being interested even when you go to him unless he is in the mood.... well I guess there isn't much to be said. Sometimes it will click and sometimes it may not. The point that I am making here is that we take the first step sometimes to spice things up or to ease up a tense situation. More than the outcome I take great satisfaction in knowing that I tried to make things better. See we can only control our actions and our thoughts. You cannot make your hubby do anything. Even if the outcome is not what you wanted, your husband will notice your affection for him.

    Well join the club. My hubby does not know how to deal with my sickness too. Do not want to go into details, but I know exactly what you mean and I have been in a similar if not worse situation. You can tell him how you feel. If it doesnt make a difference in your hubby, just change your expectations. Now that you know how he behaves, it shouldn't surprise you that much. When you don't feel well, just tell him what needs to be done for the kids and for you. Don't expect him to understand and act by himself. If you have a fever, tell him, that you have a fever, can't get up, so he will have to get food from outside. Then give a bath to the baby, give him food etc. Don't expect him to coddle you as you would him. I don't get it why husbands act this way. I think they are more scared when wives fall sick that they go into denial ( Ha ! Talk about excuses ). No they are just plain arrogant, unfeeling ..... but they are ours to love for life aren't they !

    See the point I wanted to make with these Golden Rules is very simple. Don't expect your hubby to make you happy. Ofcourse we need our hubbies to be happy, but don't depend on him entirely. You take up the initiative to look at life on the bright side. Do things that will make you happy. Make your thoughts positive. Imagine and tell yourself that your husband will be more understanding and love you the way you deserve to be loved. Believe that he is that kind of person. Be happy for it. And he will change or show what he already feels for you inside. When you are depressed everything around you will be dark and gloomy. Snap out of it. That is more easily said than done. Even if it is and act, and feels like a lie, be cheerful, try to forget the bad experiences you have had. Look to the future with hope and make your present happy and light. Soon you will really feel happy and that will definitly 100% influence your surroundings. You will see you and everone around you change for the better.

    Hope I have helped.

    Be Happy Always.
     
  4. sbonigala

    sbonigala Platinum IL'ite

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    I have been following these tips religiouly these days.. and yes theres a lot of change in me.. am more relieved and happy now :) Thanks a ton
     
  5. Shanthi

    Shanthi Silver IL'ite

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    Could someone send my reply to lathakishore [​IMG] as a private message to her. I couldn't send it.

    Thanks
     
  6. Parijatham1234

    Parijatham1234 New IL'ite

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    Dear Shanthi
    Wonderful message. Really encouraging. Keep posting like this message. Thank you for your valuable post.
     
  7. RamyaShreeVnky

    RamyaShreeVnky New IL'ite

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    all the posts are useful one way or the other it makes us think from other points of view..
     
  8. Ciny

    Ciny New IL'ite

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    Hi Shanthi

    Very beautiful writeup
     
  9. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    :hello:THESE NUGGETS written in 2007 but is current and everlasting.
    superb introspection and double distilled truths filtered into pragmatic ideas to be happy even during situations seemingly worse.
    God bless OP AND HER FOLLOWERS.
     

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