Funny Management Tip ..gauranteed Laugh. [FONT=arial,sans-serif]<HR style="COLOR: #ffffff" SIZE=1>[/FONT][FONT=arial,sans-serif]<HR style="COLOR: #ffffff" SIZE=1>[/FONT] [FONT=arial,sans-serif]Lesson: 1[/FONT] [FONT=arial,sans-serif][SIZE=+0]A [COLOR=blue! important][COLOR=blue! important]sales [/SIZE][SIZE=+0][COLOR=blue! important]rep[/color][/color], an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique [COLOR=blue! important][COLOR=blue! important]oil [/color][COLOR=blue! important]lamp[/color][/color]. They rub it and a Genie comes out. [/SIZE] [SIZE=+0]The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish." [/SIZE] [SIZE=+0]"Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the [COLOR=blue! important][COLOR=blue! important]Bahamas[/color][/color] , driving a speedboat, without a care in the world."<SCRIPT><!--D(["mb","\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\"\u003e\u003cfont\u003ePuff! She\u0026#39;s gone. \u003c/font\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\"\u003e\u003cfont\u003e\u0026quot;Me next! Me next!\u0026quot; says the sales rep. \u0026quot;I want to be in \u003ca style\u003d\"text-decoration:underline! important\" href\u003d\"http://www.indusladies.com/forums/#\" target\u003d\"_blank\" onclick\u003d\"return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)\"\u003e\u003cfont style\u003d\"font-weight:400;color:blue! important;font-family:Arial\" size\u003d\"4\"\u003e\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:400;color:blue! important;font-family:Arial\"\u003eHawaii\u003c/span\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/a\u003e , relaxing on the beach with my personal mass-euse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.\u0026quot; \u003c/font\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\"\u003e\u003cfont\u003ePuff! He\u0026#39;s gone. \u003c/font\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\"\u003e\u003cfont\u003e\u0026quot;OK, you\u0026#39;re up,\u0026quot; the Genie says to the manager. \u003c/font\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\"\u003e\u003cfont\u003eThe manager says, \u0026quot;I want those two back in the office after lunch.\u0026quot; \u003c/font\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cb\u003e\u003cu\u003e\u003cfont size\u003d\"5\"\u003e\u003cb\u003eMoral of the story:\u003c/b\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/u\u003e\u003c/b\u003e\u003cfont size\u003d\"5\"\u003e \u003cimg title\u003d\"Not that way\" alt\u003d\"\" border\u003d\"0\"\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003ci\u003e\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\"\u003e\u003ci\u003eAlways let your boss have the first say.\u003c/i\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eLESSON:2\u003cbr\u003e\u003cfont\u003eAn eagle was sitting on a \u003ca style\u003d\"text-decoration:underline! important\" href\u003d\"http://www.indusladies.com/forums/#\" target\u003d\"_blank\" onclick\u003d\"return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)\"\u003e\u003cfont style\u003d\"font-weight:400;font-size:10pt;color:blue! important;font-family:Arial\"\u003e\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:400;font-size:10pt;color:blue! important;font-family:Arial\"\u003etree\u003c/span\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/a\u003e resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, \u0026quot;Can I also sit like you and do nothing?\u0026quot; \u003c/font\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\"\u003e\u003cfont\u003eThe eagle answered: \u0026quot;Sure , why not.\u0026quot;\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\"\u003e\u003cfont\u003eSo, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it. \u003c/font\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cb\u003e\u003cu\u003e\u003cfont size\u003d\"5\"\u003e\u003cb\u003eMoral of the story:\u003c/b\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/u\u003e\u003c/b\u003e\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\"\u003e \u003cimg title\u003d\"Hiya\" alt\u003d\"\" border\u003d\"0\"\u003e\u003c/font\u003e",1]);//--></SCRIPT> [/SIZE] [SIZE=+0]Puff! She's gone. [/SIZE] [SIZE=+0]"Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in [COLOR=blue! important][COLOR=blue! important]Hawaii[/color][/color] , relaxing on the beach with my personal mass-euse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life." [/SIZE] [SIZE=+0]Puff! He's gone. [/SIZE] [SIZE=+0]"OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager. [/SIZE] [SIZE=+0]The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch." [/SIZE] Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say. LESSON:2 [SIZE=+0]An eagle was sitting on a [COLOR=blue! important][COLOR=blue! important]tree[/color][/color] resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?" [/SIZE] [SIZE=+0]The eagle answered: "Sure , why not."[/SIZE] [SIZE=+0]So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it. [/SIZE] Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up. LESSON:3 [SIZE=+0]A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy." [/SIZE] [SIZE=+0]"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. They're packed with nutrients." [/SIZE] [SIZE=+0]The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. [/SIZE] [SIZE=+0]He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree. [/SIZE] Moral of the story: Bull-s-h-i-t might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there. LESSON:4 [SIZE=+0]A little bird was flying south for the Winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. [/SIZE] [SIZE=+0]As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. [/SIZE] [SIZE=+0]A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him. [/SIZE] Morals of the story: (1) Not everyone who s-h-i-t-s on you is your enemy.<SCRIPT><!--D(["mb","\u003c/i\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e(2) Not everyone who gets you out of s-h-i-t is your friend.\u003c/i\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/i\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003ci\u003e\u003cfont size\u003d\"4\"\u003e\u003ci\u003e(3) And when you\u0026#39;re in deep s-h-i-t, it\u0026#39;s best to keep your mouth shut! \u003c/i\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003e\u003cfont size\u003d\"5\"\u003e\u003cb\u003eTHIS ENDS THE 5-MINUTE MANAGEMENT COURSE \u003cimg title\u003d\"Hiya\" alt\u003d\"\" border\u003d\"0\"\u003e\u003c/b\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003e\u003cfont size\u003d\"5\"\u003e\u003cb\u003eRegards,\u003c/b\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e",1]);D(["mb","\u003cspan class\u003dsg\u003e\n\u003cfont style\u003d\"background-color:#00cccc\"\u003egiselle.\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/span\u003e",1]);D(["mb","\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/div\u003e\u003c/div\u003e\n",0]);D(["ce"]);//--></SCRIPT> (2) Not everyone who gets you out of s-h-i-t is your friend. (3) And when you're in deep s-h-i-t, it's best to keep your mouth shut! THIS ENDS THE 5-MINUTE MANAGEMENT COURSE Regards, gisjul Big Laughbonk:bowdownHarharWitsend:coffee[/FONT]
