Feelings of a fat person- A glimpse

While empathising with you all along, this line made me to look at you with a deep respect Varalakshmi24 - "If you had an ugly mole on your face as a fellow human being I would try my best never to bring that up in a conversation". A fantastic one. Glad to read this.

There is an Aesop's fable about
Two bags that God gave to man,
One for his own follies and the other,
For others'. Then quickly our man

Put his folly bag on his back
And others' bag in front of himself.
From then on there is no lag
In criticising others denting their self.

If only he were wise enough
To put his bag in front then,
The world would be so full of
Good ones and I just longed when

That day would ever come at all,
Till someone told me that it would,
Which involved no change of bags at all,
But a mindset that is and serves good.

Just ignore what others say about you
And ignore the flaw in their physical forms.
I know that there are already a few
Who makes it better. That is the charm

That brings that impossible thing a bit
Possible as each new day arrives.
Join them and you'll feel better and fit.
You too will touch so many lives.
-rgs

 

Even I loved this last line of yours...And I can also very well understand where you are coming from, as I have also been on the receiving end for many many years because I don't know how to look good for the others. It doesn't matter if I feel ok with myself, but the others used to comment on how bad my sense is ! During the past decade, I have also been on and off with weight, and it amuses me to ends on how people view those who are actually obese and never give it a thought that it could be because of some health reasons also!!! But now, I have become a "don't care master" especially in this context!

Like you, even I don't ever like to comment on any physical features because I have myself been a victim. I prefer to focus on what's within the person rather than the cover! Only time has made me understand that its really perfectly ok to be what I am, and I consider myself fortunate that I have this long-forgotten emotion called "empathy" with me !

Your post has struck a chord with me!thumbsup

 

It touched me in every way. But this is the stand I have taken in last two years: I'm doing my best to exercise, eat healthy. At the time, I have accepted how I look. Being a fat person, never made me sit in a corner. Whether the opposite person likes it or not, this is me and I will be me.

 

1) yes- i was glad i could miss my mama's wedding, due to exams, because staying in a hostel i had swollen up to the size of a whale, and i dare not make an appearance amongst people who are obsessed with fitness.

2) yes- i have always come up with excuses not to go along with my high school friends, when they all used t ogo out, when we were back home from our respective colleges.

3) yes- i have always avoided meeting family memebers, when we used to visit india, as people are all the more insensitive there, some have actually exclaimed loudly on seeing me, and made offensive gestures to indicate how huge i have grown.

4)yes, i always hated being photographed when in college. what i didn't realise was that everybody senses your insecurity when you do that, and they get a chance to put you down.

6) yes, almost always.

7) during my first year in college, i went to a local shop to buy myself a labcoat. the silly guy
gave me a really small size, and i kept asking for a bigger size after trying one after the other, and he laughed at me. id**t!!

9)yes definately yes!! i have been given free advice n number of times. now what i do is, after the lecture, i simlpy ask them if they follow any of it? that shuts their mouth.

12) a friend of my mom's told her publicly in my presence that i should be taken to a health farm for a month.

i feel it is a curse to be born fat. i have had a sort of a complex all my life, and during college especially, i hardly got out of my room. i just went to college, and would come back and hide in my room. i didn't take part in any activity.

but i have reversed it to some extent. in the last 1 year i have lost 19 kgs, and look quiet good.
i came back to my home town 2 weeks back,now where ever i go, people are quiet shocked to see me, i get compliments from everyone, and people say i look very good!!
i feel much more confident than before, i look forward to meeting people, unlike before. i feel like an achiever!!!

 

Has anyone gone through this "Oh you would've looked better if you were a bit smaller?" Or this would suit you if you were slimmer. (Sigh)
And felt you were never good enough for anything.
I have gone through a lot of emotional problems, and the root of it all is weight weight weight. Dont ever let it bog you down, ever.
I am still fat and I have a baby son, and I've failed miserably at various attempts to lose it. Its not the diet, its not the exercise. Its just the way I am. Just love me... unconditionally!
Its a long run to the finish line

 

Oh yes..

People have asked me if I am going to have a baby. Snide remarks/ comments on the dress I wear. Tell me how big my a** is. Asking me if I shop in the maternity section etc.

N thn on the eve of Jan 1 2012 I realized enough is enough I should start a healthy routine for my self. I started exercising, eating right. Counting calories I ate and counting calories I burned. After 8 months I was back to my previous size. Lost 50 lbs. N still continuing on the diet and exercise

It was a tough journey from size 10 to size 0 but it was worth it.