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Feel like burden on my DH

Discussion in 'Infants' started by pratibha1616, Mar 10, 2010.

  1. pratibha1616

    pratibha1616 Senior IL'ite

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    I think this is the right place to stick my post I am in my 6th month and facing a big problem..me and my DH both are working and I will get 3-4 months ML..my MIL will come in the first week of June and will go back in the first week of Aug.. I have to join my office in Oct and there is no one to take care of my child:drowning..I requested my MIL and FIL to stay with us, but they refused..should I leave my job?? I am very scared because of expenses and thinking of financial problems and feel like I will be burden on my DH [​IMG] Is anybody facing the same problem?? Please help me!!!
     
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  2. Priya_Mommy

    Priya_Mommy Gold IL'ite

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    Prathibha,
    This is one of the biggest problems of parenting by working moms.
    Is there any problem for them to take care of your baby??
    If they are staying in the same city, probably you can better shift near to their house and appoint a maid to take care of the baby under their supervision.
    Why dont you check with your parents??
    If nothing worksout, check if you can get a full time maid to take care of little baby.
    Shift your home near to your office, so that every 3 hours or so you can come and see your baby
     
  3. pratibha1616

    pratibha1616 Senior IL'ite

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    Thanks Priya Mommy for your response...Me and my hubby staying alone in Mumbai and my in-laws, parents and all my relatives stays in Delhi..I don't know my in-laws problem why they are behaving like this...and I cant leave my child with any maid alone..
     
  4. radhaparth2000

    radhaparth2000 Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear Prathiba,

    First thing be happy and do not worry about anything at this juncture as you are expecting. Be positive. My mom was lucky that her mother took care of me, but when my bro was born she was too old to take care. After 3 months of ML my mom found a day care and her office was very close to the daycare and our house. Believe me or not she left the baby in day care when he was just 60 days old(This is in 1985) with a heavy heart. She used to feel very bad about it, but the lady who ran the day care was kind enough to take care of my bro very well. today my bro is a software engineer. Please check if you can hire a maid and shift residence close to office. I am unable to comment anything about quitting the job as i feel its a decision that should be made by you and your Dh. My mom did not have that comfort, but no regrets on that. My bro loves my mom too much and he understands why she left him in the day care. All the best
     
  5. Mahajanpragati

    Mahajanpragati Platinum IL'ite

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    hi,
    stop thinking that u are a burden to ur husband.u are his better half & soon going to be mother of his child.stop worrying too much as u have many options:
    can u & ur dh shift to delhi.i mean can u both find a job there.ur dh can immediately start looking while u can take a break of few mths.

    maybe ur MIL will change her mind when she sees her grand child.ask ur dh to try to persuade her.

    in a metro like mumbai there is no dearth of daycare.choose a good one.rather start looking right now.

    maybe ur mom can help u for few mths.

    if u plan to leave job there is still time to budget ur expenses & start planning on how to live on one income.
    this is a very joyful period .try not to worry to much.u will pass ur anxiety to the baby.
    all the best
    pragati
     
  6. chandannasta

    chandannasta Silver IL'ite

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    I would just say 1 thing don leave your kid just 3 months old with any maid. You take care of yr kid bcoz a mom's presence is very important for his kid.

    Y dont u request yr MIL sweetly. I think she will change her opinion after she sees the kid's face.

    You know some kids have got those charm in them to attract any 1. Don think anything right now since u will be a good mother of a happy child.

    So don take any tensions. If you take tension it will affect yr kid. Eat well and heftyly.

    My personal opinion try to eat lots of badam also so that yr kid becomes more smarter and knowlegable and he could grab things much faster while studying.

    I have seen this things when my sis was preggy. Now she has 2 kids and 1 of them studies in ICSE in Bombay Scottish and 1 is just 4 & 1/2 yrs old.

    I am not so educated but try to learn most of the things from my office as well as from Internet.
     
  7. pratibha1616

    pratibha1616 Senior IL'ite

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    Thank you so much for all your suggestions. I have decided not to take tension right now because it will effect my baby. I will try again to convince my MIL otherwise I will leave my job and take a break!!!
     

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