Faltu Weekend Musings

Faltu Saturday Musings
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Akshay Kumar was recently declared to be the highest Tax payer at 31 crores, followed by Rajesh Khanna at 11 crores and others.


The surprising part was about Rajesh Khanna, who was till a few years back almost bankrupt, and his bunglow was under the Income Hammer for nonpayment of dues.And he turns out to be one of the best Tax payers.


When the lord is kind, he pours , and in Rajesh Khanna’s case this is true.


A decade ago, the only list of Income Tax of the Filmstars was the defaulters, in which Rajesh Khanna was prominent, along with Rekha and others.I guess it was a pride to be seen as a defaulter.


Something akin to Marwaris.The more they go bankrupt, they speak it with pride.They used to say proudly, I have gone bankrupt 6 times, or 10 times, and people used to look at them with awe, knowing he is a rich man, it is another matter, that it is public money.People would flock with marriage proposals to these fellows.


But I am happy to say, people are getting their morals back, and now people are proud to be highest Tax Payers.





Beggars can be Choosers – Last week was this article about the beggars getting Ready for the Commonwealth Games in <?XML:NAMESPACE PREFIX = ST1 /><ST1:CITY><ST1LACE>Delhi</ST1LACE></ST1:CITY> in 2010, next year.


Training schools have started, whereby teachers teach the beggars foreign lanuages, and the small kids and mothers are taught foreign languages. They are taught “ My mother is sick, is in Hospital” My son is dieing, etc in Spanish,German, Italian.


They are brought the real notes, and taught that this is dollors, which is worth 50/-, Euro is worth 60/- Lira , and Yen are useless, and they are made to feel the real notes.


They forgot <ST1:COUNTRY-REGION><ST1LACE>Indonesia</ST1LACE></ST1:COUNTRY-REGION>, where the currency is called Rupiah, and a 1 lakh note is called Joota, which in Indian means “ Shoes”. One Joota is worth 10 dollors, but the note says
1,00,000.So beggars are taught to discount the zeros and just ask for Euros and Dollors.


The other day a foreigner lady was surprised, when a beggar approached her, and started his begging in all the languages he was taught, thinking at least one language this lady will understand.


What the beggars forgot, was that Commonwealth Games are only of the English speaking countries, and all this exercise will go waste.


But I am very happy, that our beggars are learning so well, and soon we can boast of the most educated beggars in the world.We must be proud of the beggars of <ST1:COUNTRY-REGION><ST1LACE>India</ST1LACE></ST1:COUNTRY-REGION>.


But I must tell u all, a small secret, that I was once a beggar too.Dont laugh, this is no joking matter.No respectable person will call himself a beggar, and I think I am respectable.


I was a Garment ExPORTER. Porter means a coolie, the guy who lifts luggage for u.Well for orders I had to beg, then for my payments I had to beg, then again for orders I had to beg, and one day I deicided enough is enough, and let me retire, and count the money I have begged all my life, when am I going to enjoy it.


So now I have stopped being a beggar, and a porter, and now I am a respectable blogger.To those now who know my secret, can either discontinue their friendship with me, I will have no complaints, for I could not keep this secret in my stomach for long, before u guys and gals found out, let me let it out, before someone blackmails me.


Up to u guys, its OK with me.

MOM AND ME JUST BEFORE SHE LEFT FOR MUMBAI ON THE 6TH.MY HAIR IS ORIGNAL COLOUR COURTESY FISH EATING HABIT.





THE AGE DIVIDE – HT 3<SUP>rd</SUP> May 09


Lovely article about marriage with lots of age differences.The Article says

1) Men can Get away with dating much younger women, but older women are laughed for doing the same thing.
2) Demi Moore – is the butt of jokes, for marrying Aston Kucher.He is almost the same age as her daughter from the first marriage to Bruce Willis.And when Kutcher posted her pic in a Bikini, on twitter, people twittered that this is what she got for marrying a child
3) Rupert Murdoch has a wife 30 years younger to him.
4) Donald Trump’s wife;s get younger with every decade.
5) Madonna is dating Jesus, I mean the guy named Jesus, she is 50 and he is 20.


Well u see, even I was tempted, when I saw all this, but when I saw that I may become the butt of jokes on Sulekha, well I dropped the idea. All my readers will run away, and anyway I don’t have alimony to pay, so I have become financially prudent, going with the recession times, but when things improve, I may rethink, but till then, the idea is dropped , rather frozen.HAHA


I just don’t understand why they cant find their own ages.Physical attraction is fine , but mentally the younger one will be immature in comparison.Maybe the older one is loaded, that is the attraction.Cant the older one see, this is a gold digger, and the sex will prove very expensive, as Madonna found out with Guy Ritchie.


I wish they would consult me, in consideration for some money.HAHA

Reminds me of Saif Ali Khan, who married Amrita Singh who was 10 years older to him, and now going around with Kareena , who is 10 years younger to him, the difference between the ages of teh two ladies bing 20 years.wow.He now wants younger ones with a vengence eh !


Auction for Cremation –


A few days back., a Jain Muni died, and to perform his last rites, an auction was held, and the guy who won paid 1,11,11111.00, that is 1 crore 11 lakhs.Phew, just to burn a dead body, and get yr name in the papers.


Nothing to say really to this.


And another news of a 8 year boy, jaini, who was to take Diksha, meaning he would eb separated from his parents, and he would live the life of a saint.


When he was brought on stage, he developed cold feet, and in front of hundreds said, that he did not know he was to take Diksha, and now he does not want to take it, because, he then cannot eat chocolates, icecreams, nor watch TV and cricket, cant leave his parents, and he cant study then.


So the authorities were called, and the organizers all ran away.


Well all sort of things happen in India.That is why it is called Vibrant India, and once again I am thankful to the newspapers for all the lovely scandals they provide me with , with which to bore all u unsuspecting readers.


Till next week , friends, when I collect more scandals, have a smile, and cup of coffee on me.


KAMAL MAHTANI

 

Your one comment made my day, and that a super one, and now no regrets if another one dosnt come.

Yes u do deserve a cup of coffee, and that too the Starbuck quality.Have it on me please.

Well exports these days is all about giving credit, where the buyer plays with yr money.If he makes he pays u, if he loses, u lose.that is the reason i decided enough is enough, i worked at my terms then, the begging part was a joke, but it is true these days.

And u do right by not lending.I have, and the money and the friend bopth disappeared.

Thanks for yr lovely comments.Regards.kamal

 

Dea r Mindi,

You see, First Saif was the learner and Amitra was the teacher.

Now Saif is the teacher, and Kareena the learner, though i doubt if she needs anything to be taught, she must be knowing everything i guess.

Well why does one need to cry on Mothers days.Why cant we remember them with a smile, even if they are no more.Re,mber the good things about her, and share it with the world with a smile.

And yes send over the bill for two coffes to me, ok ? Till we meet.

did u receive my scans? i sent them yesterday.let me know if u liked them.

Regards

kamal

 

Dear Aruna,

glad now yr attention has shifted from the spinx of Egypt, to us poor humans.Welcome back to civilization once again.Big Laugh

Well there are many a fish in the sea, and there are many a madonna in the world, u see.HAHA

See first Saif was a student to Amita, now he knows the ropes and is now a teacher to Kareena.HAHA

and next week i have a lot of news for u.

Dev Ananad is demolishing his bunglow and making arartments, selling a 3000 feet flat for 7 crores

Adnan Sami's impending divorce from his wife, and the drama that followed.

Grooming schools for brides to be, charges 50000 for a 2 month course, teaching the ladies how the pllease the husband, how to wear a saree, and how to cook and make his belly come out.HAHA

And lots more, lets see what else comes in the papers this coming week.

Thanks and have one mroe coffee on me.Regards.kamal

 

Dea r Pads,

Salman Rushdie is a right example, i forgot about him.You are sharp and up with the latest gossip eh ! Big LaughEven his wives keep getting younger.

what is their formula ? what is it that they have that i dont ? Ahhh its money and fame is it , that i dont have.HAHA.in that case i hope god keeps these two things away from me.

Coffe i dont know much, but yes the coffee my sough indina' friends mother used to serve me years back, the fresh grounded one, i just cant forget it.Must be the same even today in yr home.lovely.

thanks, and till next week.Regards

kamal