Exchange of Letters- A MUST READ

Touching post indeed.As someone said there are exceptions.My brother wound up once for all from Canada to take care of my mother.

 

Hai friends

As bala and vysan said, there are EXCEPTIONS........about my family , bala has told everything...we did our seavi.to our father till his last second.........bala has helped a lot financially , me partkly finacially and physically a lot, used to take him for check - ups, got him medicines,for outdoor work .....mainly for lifting my dad........from his bed and making him to sit for eating, for toilet purpose,for medcines.........i jus make him to lean on me and i will jus hug him tightly and put him in chair and sameway from chair to bed.........dont think its easy job.....jus imagine lifitng male person with normal weight , how it will be.......I WAS THANKING GOD FOR MAKING ME FAT AND BROAD SO IT WAS EASY FOR ME AT TIMES, TO HOLD HIM AND MAKE HIM TO LEAN SO THAT I CAN EASILY BALANCE HIM ON ME...........EVEN MY MALE RELATIVES CANT DO THIS AND DEFINITLEY THEY WILL PUT HIM DOWN.......

I got my own flat in the next door to my mom,jus b'cos i want to be with them , to assit them and take care of them at this age, i dont have brother and bala always stay in another country(her position is like that.not blaming her) and dont know where my younger sis will go after her wedding........MY HUBBY IS VERY NICE PERSON AND HE IS GEM OF A PERSON.TREATS MY PARENTS LIKE HIS OWN...........IAM NOT EARNING , BUT ONLY WITH HIS SUPPORT IAM DOING EVERYTHING TO THEM.........

My younger sister did great job....no one in this world will do like her.............and definitely GOD will bless her with GOOD HEALTH and happy life..........

Even all my cousin brothers, they luv their parents very much and even refused their promotions!!!!!!!!!!and opportunities to other countries ..........!BELEIVE ME......... they dont want to leave their parents at this age and go seprately......

MY FAMILY REALLY BLESSED in this matter.

And, ofcourse, i agree that, lot of people are still there, forget their duties to parents and even i know them personally....

Only thing we can do is .........TEACHING OUR KIDS..about value of luv,affection,relationship...............nama namma amma appa kuda nalla relationship maintain panni avangala anba, adarava kavankicha.............kids will definitely follow us.............because we are their role models..................WHAT WE SOW WE REEP...............is it not right????????

I have scribbled somthing whatever i feel, if something wrong in that .iam sorry

latamurali

 

Mals,
The letters bought back my memories. I was pregnant with my daughter, husband in another town. Eldest BIL in another town. Eldest co-sis just recovering from an operation. Second BIL gone for higher studies in UK. So it was my second co-sis and FIL there to take care of MIL. She didnot allow me to see her in the hospital as I was pregnant and she was in the isolated floor of the Appollo hospital. SIL also in US.

I had always felt that I was unable to be with her when she was in the hospital. She is a great woman who have given lots of strength not only to her kids but also to us DILs.

Yes, it happens out of compulsion for some and for some they become the exceptions.

I would like to share with you all one particular thing; when we were born, me and my brother my father had advised my mother one particular thing. It is a daughter and she will get married and go to another house, and it is your son and he should have to take care of his future. So dont put all your love and affection on your kids alone. It is similar to what Gibran's prose means. Though my parents shower lots of love on us and our spouse's till date, I know that they have always understood that we also have our own family and our own duties. But never have both of us shun out of our duties as a son and daughter towards our parents.

 

Hello everybody,

I have all along been a silent member and i should also accept that there is so much to read in this site that its always like 'not enough time to post the comments'. I hope to improve my interactions.

This particular thread just prompted me to take time out to write purely because of the subject and its timing. A friend of mine is in a similar position. Her father is terminally ill, though not bedridden/hospitalised. He is being taken care of by her mother who also has mobility problems. She is staying abroad and keeps visiting her parents in India and had been there these holidays too. She is the only child and is feeling guilty that she is unable to do much. She has a kid who is attending school.

I thought that i will help the poor soul who is feeling so miserable with all your valuable suggestions and wishes.

Had it been the other way round (god forbid), either winding up or sending dil to take care of the family would have been the immediate option. But what do you think will be practically possible here?

Thanks for your support

Usha

 

Hi UshaV,

Are you still alive. Long time no see. Good finally you came to comment on this thread.

I feel sorry for your friend. If your friends hubby is good and understanding, why dont she go for a year after this term or in mean time if her mil can take care of the kid and hubby for sometime, she can go and be with them. May be she should ask her friends or cousins to visit her parents frequently and keep her posted the real situation as some times parents doesnt like to trouble their children with their health problems.

My sisters told me about my dad, and also said dont worry we are there, we wil take care, but my close friend told me that i should come down to see my dad as he looks worse and he will feel really happy to see me and my daughter. There will be a change in the house as everyone is full time worried about dad. So i went to India for a month. It was a real change, my sisters, mom, dad were all happy. Though my going there doesnt make a big difference in his health condition. Atleast i was happy to see him and he was happy to see us. He cannot talk, walk, only his eyes were active till the end.

Bala

 

Hi Mals
Missed you !!!!!!! Glad to see u back How is everything????????

 

Mals,
Very touching exchange of letters, indeed!

this shows how the affection of parents differ from their children.
even my parents are alone there, so I make it a point to talk to them on Skype every week. If my mother learns how to operate I am ready to talk to them daily, and say hi.
They didn't even want the computer which my husband bought solely for this purpose. I think they are happy now atleast they can talk to me and see me and my family.
this time when we went to India,

i even want to buy a cordless phone which will be of great help to them. But they refused to get it . the reason they gave us was ---with that money do something for your kids. we don't need anything at this age.

sriniketan