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Edd Nearing And I Am Confused

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by sweety127, Sep 19, 2022.

  1. sweety127

    sweety127 Gold IL'ite

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    Hi all,

    I am pregnant with my second child and my edd falls at the end of this month. I am currently in my parents place along with my daughter. My H and MIL dropped me here and are currently staying in SIL's place that is around 2 hrs journey from my place. H will come a few days before delivery.
    MIL is currently having a decent relationship with me and my family. She has even confessed to my parents that she is a changed person now and has understood her mistakes which she did out of ignorance and insecurities.
    Now, my parents are both chronic patients and have been managing the house with great difficulty. Tending to my super active elder daughter is itself so demanding in addition to house hold activities. We do have 2 maids but one had gone on indefinite leave for the past one month crippling us further. I had been helping them with whatever I could but I am currently hospitalized due to acute strep infection and have to stay here for another 2-3 days. I am managing on my own with the help of my sister. Parents are at home taking care of daughter and house hold activities. I told H not to come as we all are currently infected expect my father and daughter (touchwood)

    MIL seeing our condition of has volunteered to help us out during delivery along with H. The only issue presently is that she keeps talking non stop. Is it a wise decision to invite my MIL to my parent's home? I am scared and confused.
    Please share your insights.
     
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  2. Anusha2917

    Anusha2917 IL Hall of Fame

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    The old one's at home (MIL and mothers) are very helpful in postpartum. But their help comes with so many unwanted advice. I don't know how your mil n mother are. In general the older generation don't really understand science and kind of take away your peace by their myths. (My experience)

    Postpartum is a delicate period where stress will affect your mental health, physical health,milk supply etc.
    A non stop talking mil is something I would avoid until a few weeks (months ) postpartum.

    Good luck with your delivery:blush::blush:

    Edited to add : look for an other maid.So that you can rest a bit after delivery and tend to the baby well.
     
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  3. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    If I were you, I would look for another maid. Even if it is expensive, it is still worth it.

    Your life will completely changed after the birth of your second child. You need rest, peace and special food to recover. You can't step in and help your sick mom during the first few weeks of your postpartum.

    Your elderly mom with chronic illness can't handle everything alone. She has a house to run, a daughter to care for and a grand daughter to attend to. Not an easy job. She will get tired, frustrated and obviously start complaining.

    Your mom & MIL would be a perfect combo technically. Two elder women with lots of experience in child care is the best of everything. But, in our houses it is a very tricky situation to be in. I am not sure how your mom & MIL get along with each other.
    Delivery is not just a natural thing in our culture. They treat it with special care, and different people have different belief when it comes to food and other practices after delivery.
    If your mom & MIL do not sync well, it will become a headache for you & your H. It can ruin your health & peace of mind and to some extend your marriage as well.
    So, better keep them at a distance, and allow them to meet only when needed.
     

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