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Does the End justify the Means?

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by Anandchitra, Nov 5, 2007.

  1. Anandchitra

    Anandchitra IL Hall of Fame

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    This sunday my son played in a tennis match where there were no referees other than the 2 players.This practice is being adopted to promote fair play. In my experience this has prompted more foul play and foul tempers and foul moods .. Parents and other spectators were supposed to watch from sidelines without disturbing the contestants. My son's opponent made a few wrong line calls. Some could be attributed to poor judgement but some were really wrong. Though we could see clearly from sidelines we could not do anything about it. My son had to forego the point which was rightfully his. This went on for some time and my son finally did win that match. But the other kid approx. same age as my son did what he did so as to win the match. His parents were watching too but made no visible interaction either during or after the game. (which they or their coach could and should have done). This is no isolated incident for us. when we goto our kids soccer game the parents goad their kids from the sidelines and openly reprimand the kid for not running harder or pushing some other child fast enough and such. All these are being done solely with the end in mind. The end being to WIN. At what ever the cost and what ever it takes. For this sole reason everyone seems fine with their means like wrong line calling, as long as it brings them a winner.!! I clearly dont think so but I do seem to be in a minority! Do you think this Is justified.?
     
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  2. rajmiarun

    rajmiarun Gold IL'ite

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    Dear AC,
    Yes, it is the parents who are the main culprits and the kids take cue only from the parents only. If the parents could teach the kids to play fair matches and games there will not be any hard feeling between the kids also. In general it is said that kids never keep anything in their minds be it fights or sorrows or for that case even their loss in something. But it is the parents who teach the kids to keep these in mind and show it.

    It should be the parents who need to be taught along with the kids as to how to treat a game a game and in any game winning or loosing is so common and only one could win and the other should loose. As a parent all the parents will want their kids to win but they should teach their kids to accept losses also. The same kid cannot be winning always and one day he/she will also be loosing out to someone strong enough than them. But when they loose they should accept it with full heart that their efforts are less or they should have practiced more; but todays parents are not teaching thier children to accept looses, but teach to practice unfair means and methods to win.

    It is sad that your son's opponent didnot practice fair means, but as a parent after the match you could have talked to that kid and thier parents; but there too lies one small problem they should be willing to listen, otherwise it is not worth.

    Just my thoughts.
     
    sindmani likes this.
  3. Anandchitra

    Anandchitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Rajmi
    I would never dare try and talk to the other kids parents at all. that is scary.
     
  4. Eljaype

    Eljaype Bronze IL'ite

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    Dear Chitra,
    It is a very good post. I have seen this happening in many places, even on the roads!!!

    Ennathhukku Vittu kudukkanumm??? It has been the by word where ever they go?

    Sometimes my kids used to ask me "why should we give in? They think that we do not know how to succeed and that we are always giving in because of that." Have you an answer to that?

    Humility is one thing everyone should learn. It is missing in the recent years.
    Parents have to teach kids, fairness in Play and humility in their tender age itself.

    Love
    Latha :wave
     
  5. rajmiarun

    rajmiarun Gold IL'ite

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    Dear AC,
    That is what most parents do. If your son have not done anything wrong, then why should you worry to talk. Just think of this, if your son have lost due to the unhealthy practice of the other kid, you will be hurt a lot. So atleast in future dont shy away in talking to them if you sense unhealthy practice.
     
  6. Vysan

    Vysan Gold IL'ite

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    Dear AC,

    The world has become more and more crazy about winning at any cost... Rather money, name and publicity... I still remember, when we were in Bahrain, we had a neighbour who will teach her kid how to be selfish and win at any cost... Both husband and wife were highly qualified people... The lady said, that in this competitive world, i have to teach my son to be selfish... When Shan told me this I was surprised and taken back... People nowadays justify this...

    The kids learn from the parents... The parents want their son/daughter to be a great acheiver... They are not concerned about how they do it... So the kids follow that... In my opinion the parents should change... It has to come from within... We cannot go and tell them or reason it out... They have their own logics.. If you try to explain further, you lose the friendship and get a worst enemy.... Because, you are talking about their beloved kid... Kakkaikum than kunju pon kunju....Experience speaks...
     
  7. Kamalji

    Kamalji IL Hall of Fame

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    AC,

    It is the parents who spoil the child, telling him to win at any cost.

    A few months back, a father beat his son so much bcs he did not win the match, that he died.

    But this wont go away, this will carry on.Sad but true.Regards.kamal
     
  8. Anandchitra

    Anandchitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Hello All
    Looks like we all can see its the parents fault. Unfortunately they are sowing the seeds for danger. Imagine how our world is going to be in the next 40-50 years. Maybe I should bring up my son their way so he will be able to love and survive. Now I shudder to think how he's going to survive!
     

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