1. How to Build Positivity in Married Life? : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice

Does it make sense?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by stronglady2013, Jul 23, 2013.

  1. stronglady2013

    stronglady2013 Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    109
    Likes Received:
    64
    Trophy Points:
    68
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi Everyone,

    I have a situation. I want to visit India for a vacation(for 2 weeks) to visit my family and I have not been there since 4 years. Well, I asked my husband at first he was okay then other day he started saying how would you go alone by yourself, there is no security in India. with whom you will live(Both my parents expired when we were kids)? My sisters stays there and I used to live with them before marriage . Initially, our grandmother raised us and after that we were all by ourselves. I am always shocked to hear his words. I am really shunned over his insensitivity towards me. There has been a huge fight over this last night. If I book a ticket and go then it is gonna be a big blunder. Hope you can understand this. How to handle this situation? How to convince him? I feel he is just putting up drama. And, All these does not come up when I have to go on business trip. He does not say all these stuff. He is quite okay with it.
     
    Loading...

  2. sweetshreya

    sweetshreya IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    2,073
    Likes Received:
    5,286
    Trophy Points:
    383
    Gender:
    Female
    With whom are you planning to stay? Make a detailed plan and show it to him. Ex: D1-D6 with Sis 1, D7-D10 with Uncle/Aunt, D10-D15 with Sis 2. If he is worried about your traveling, tell him you will travel by flight or AC/First class train journey so that all the co-passengers are decent enough. And that you will make day time journeys only. Or that someone will accompany you during the journey, etc.
     
    3 people like this.
  3. stronglady2013

    stronglady2013 Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    109
    Likes Received:
    64
    Trophy Points:
    68
    Gender:
    Female
    Thanks for the advice Shreya...
     
    1 person likes this.
  4. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    12,503
    Likes Received:
    30,273
    Trophy Points:
    540
    Gender:
    Female
    Is his concern really drama? Is the business trip to India or within the U.S.?

    How to convince him? Do not "convince" him. Simply agree with his concerns about security. Tell him you are also thinking about it. You should be thinking about it. Tell him the steps you have in mind to be safe. Don't argue any more over it. Do not book ticket and go, but also do not make booking the ticket subject to his 100% approval. In all future discussions about it, keep calm. Don't get emotional. Don't get angry if he is not exactly tactful when expressing his concerns. Present your arguments confidently. Where do you plan to stay?

    If you are yourself convinced that you have taken the necessary precautions, tell him so, and go ahead with the ticket booking. After that ignore any long faces, and don't expect a wholehearted happy sendoff.
     
    2 people like this.
  5. stronglady2013

    stronglady2013 Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    109
    Likes Received:
    64
    Trophy Points:
    68
    Gender:
    Female
    I am planning to stay at my sister's place and his concern is DRAMA. It is a personal trip to India. But on business trip I travel to US often.
     
    1 person likes this.

Share This Page