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Do You Think People Change After Many Years ?

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by anika987, Dec 15, 2021.

  1. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    I have changed for the better I feel but certain scars still remain though I hav figured out a way to move past them.


    There is this person on FB who is friends with some of my friends.We were all in the same
    College.

    She was popular in my class inColkge coz she was super rich,wore amazon clothes and had clear skin.I was someone with specs,acne and thin as a stick and come from a middle
    Class family.I still used to feel Pretty special about myself .

    Somehow she treated me like crap.if I got near her while walking in the corridor..she will be like “Argh!“ and twitch her face with disgust.I have seen some of my classmates laugh at this.Being an introvert it was very hurtful (many one of those instances which got me an unrelentless passion towards fitness and grooming subconsciously )

    I have never tried to talk to her coz I know she will be rude but on some occasions where I have to ..she will act very high an mighty and look down upon me.

    I was talking to my friend and she had casually mentioned about her and how she is also In the US etc etc ..

    Just a random Thought..

    We all make Mistakes when we were young and the mere mention of her name brings back those memories.Do u think people change and become more humble
    Or worse over the years?
     
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  2. MalStrom

    MalStrom IL Hall of Fame

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    It depends on the person and how they have grown and matured: or not. There is no universal answer to these questions.
     
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  3. Thoughtful

    Thoughtful Gold IL'ite

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    One thing is evident. Anika is not an introvert. :)
     
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  4. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    I would call myself an Ambivert.:)

    somewhere btw introvert and extrovert.

    Also,over the years I have become distant with people in general.I like talking to them but being careful.more peaceful
     
  5. abc00

    abc00 Gold IL'ite

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    In my experience what I have seen is anything can happen, people may or may not change depending on the situation. I myself have become humbler but some people might still view that as worse or vice versa.
     
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  6. stayblessed

    stayblessed Platinum IL'ite

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    When in college we are not kids. In fact according to me in 9th or 10th or even a little before we would have enough maturity to not differentiate between people based on colour or skin or beauty. If people choose to do it then that's their basic nature. In my experience people who make fun of others beauty won't change over years unless their kids or whom they love are made fun of for the same. This is pretty harsh but that's the truth. Even then there are chances they won't think of what they did as bad, but only cry for their loved ones.
    Your post struck a raw nerve. If this post is because you want to get an opinion if you want to get in touch with that person, then I would say, don't. Whether or not she has changed, these things would only open the old wounds and we would also feel a little happy or at least think for a second Karma is a boomerang if they are in any any way suffering because of the same deed that they did to us after which we would be ashamed of our own thought. At least it had happened to me.
    I can't stand people who criticise others for the way they look. So may be my post is biased too.
     
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  7. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Yeah we thinking to send her a request assuming she might have changed but not sure. You are right
     
  8. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    Experiences and exposure change people with time. Also, their behavior drastically change with different people.

    Definitely, she can't treat you the same way she did before because:-
    1. You are no longer the tiny, introvert Anika. But a fit & beautiful woman.
    2. You are no longer that middle class girl with simple cloths on. But you are an American citizen

    We can't change others, but we can change how they treat us by changing ourselves for better.
    This is what I have experienced in my life
     
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  9. preethignan

    preethignan Silver IL'ite

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    Nobody can try to hurt us unless we let them to. This trait comes with age and maturity. So if you want to make new friends try some random ppl whom you don't have any past connect with. I also had a friend(now no longer)in school . We studied in the same class for 14 years . Nobody liked her because she was rude. I was always an easy going girl so didn't take too much into heart. I was the one who sat next to her for 6 years. After school we moved to different colleges, then lost touch. We met once in a mall accidentally with families. I spoke to her myself she just gave a rude answer and moved on. I just laughed it off thinking she is still the same immature girl. We were family friends too but when my dad died nobody from her family bothered to enquire even. I said to myself enough is enough she is not worthy enough to talk with. I stopped contacting her totally. This year she wished me in the school group on my birthday. I didn't even bother to reply. I feel more at peace now.
     
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  10. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    So sweet sbgv and totally agree with the last line
     

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