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Do you involve your kids in the house chores?

Discussion in 'Schoolgoers & Teens' started by Sindhuja, Jul 15, 2007.

  1. Sindhuja

    Sindhuja Silver IL'ite

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    Hi, all,

    Do you involve your kids in the house chores?

    I do (but not all the times). I want them to help me in the house chores. But what's the use? I have to do it again. So, i feel like just do it by myself.

    What do you do?
     
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  2. Blondie

    Blondie Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi Sindhu,

    A job cannot be done perfectly on the first try. You may feel that it is efficient time wise and quality wise to do every thing by yourself . Have you ever felt that your life would have been much easier if your better half knew how to do things around house and kitchen the way they should be done?? If you did then you know that you have to train your kids well so that coming out of your home they are well equipped to take care of themselves.

    So have patience with them and keep giving them age appropriate chores like unloading the dish washer and put away dishes in their places (not just dump them in one cabinet). Ask them to wipe the dishes when you are at the sink washing them. Table setting also can be done by kids as young as six year olds and clean up after play time is taught in preschool, they just don't do it at home because they know they can get away with it.

    My teen age son(14 yrs) does all his laundry by himself (wash,dry,fold & put them away) and helps out with dinner (I should say makes it) one night a week, he is working on improving his skills at cooking things other than noodles and mashed potatoes. I had promised myself that my future daughter in law will not have any complaints with him atleast on this regard.

    As per my daughter, she loves to bake and I really had to teach her to clean up afterwards

    So keep on giving them chores and may be on the Nth try they can do them like you do ??:tongue
     
  3. Sriniketan

    Sriniketan IL Hall of Fame

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    Same here, Sindhuja. But I don't know how do my children earn good names in India when they go for summer vacation. They say that they help a lot. :idontgetit:
    As Blondie pointed out we should try and try till we succeed.
    Thanks Blondie for the advice. Likewise you had trained your children also.
    Sriniketan
     
  4. Sindhuja

    Sindhuja Silver IL'ite

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    Hi, Blondie,
    I appreciate your advice. My daughter helps me in doing dishes, cleaning the table, vacuuming etc... But if she cleans the table, the place near the faucette becomes wet. Then i loose my patience. She does her own laundry. But she will not fold it. I have to ask her if she has folded the clothes. Then she will do. Like you said, i need to be more patient. Let me try.


    Sriniketan, kids take liberty with us. Anyways, let us try.
     
    Last edited: Jul 15, 2007
  5. sunkan

    sunkan Gold IL'ite

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    dear sindhuja,
    many years ago there was a family oriented film in tamil and the parents unable to make the children understand the financial condition the father takes the trouble of handing the money meant for the house and asks the children to take over and run the house, in the process after a lot of toil the children do learn abt their needs and unnecessary expenses so slowly they cultivate the planning and help the parents but somehow on one side they may loose their childhood, but we need to inculcate some habits for their future..
    both my daughters learnt to cook at a tender age of 13 and 14 now they excel and the husband says none like my wife, now this is important because no amount of degree is going to help any one when the stomach growls and u need to be expert there..and yes we do become the sterm mother to keep them in tow, later they do understand but still we can always teach with a lot of love and sometime help out with them...but be at it...always so they improve..mothers are mothers..my mother who is 76 still goads me sometime that a particular things should be done that way, and i ask her u tell this to ur 55yr old, so mothers never change, they are always at them..regards sunkan
     
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  6. AnithaSrinivas

    AnithaSrinivas New IL'ite

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    My little girl will turn 2 this July. She knows that she has to do the clean up after she plays with her toys.. so in night I sit with her and guide her where the specific toy has to go and she would do it..

    WHen ever I do the laundry, she comes to help me :) once the clothes are washed and i transfer them to dryer she will be right beside me.. I got to give her the clothes from washer and she will put them in dryer( front loading) and once she is done with all clothes she asks for fabric softener sheet (she calls it tissue) and puts it ,closes the dryer and then leaves the place...
    Dont ask me how she helps in folding clothes...she acts as if she is folding it and keeps throwing them all over the place. :wave

    Still a Looooooooooooong way to go...
     
  7. Sindhuja

    Sindhuja Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Sunkan,
    Thank you for your advice:-D . It is not that my DD doesn't do. My daughter does some chores, of course my daughter did make :-D some cutlets on Mother's Day. She can cook some basic items like rasam, potatoes and can also make rotis (should not mind the shape). But the kitchen will be messy. So I will do it by myself. Hope she will learn as she grows.

    Thanks again!
    best regards,
     
    Last edited: Jul 15, 2007
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  8. Sindhuja

    Sindhuja Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Anita,
    It is good to know that your two year old is helping you. Hope she does the same when she grows.

    regards,
     
  9. Dewdrop

    Dewdrop Gold IL'ite

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    Hi Sindhuja,
    Your posting reminds me of my own mum ----- she used to give me some work but do it again , after i had completed it 'cos it was not upto her standard ! I would sweep a room happily, thinking i'm helping her -- the next minute she would say, there's still some sand here & sweep all over herself ! Even folding clothes, laying the table, hanging out the washed clothes, filling water for the fridge ----- everything she used to re-do ; therby annoying me to the :evil: core ! Even if i proudly used to plait my own hair for school.....she would bite her teeth & untie it and plait it herself, all the while muttering .... Whatever i did wasn't good enough, so very discouraged & fed up, I stopped doing chores around the house ; She said nothing at all as she was also relieved . Her attitude was the reason I stubbornly refused to let her teach me cooking also 'cos i know she wouldn't be satisfied with how much ever effort i put in to it . The net result ------ i suffered terribly in the initial years after marriage , :cry: not knowing how to do certain household stuff ; how to organise the home /our time ; so I was always edgy, cluttered, zero confidence, reduced to tears sometimes at my own inability......... even today, if i have some in-laws visiting / staying with me , I totally freeze up & get tensed , which increases my inefficiency ...

    In stark contrast, my perimma [mum's elder sister] allowed her daughter, my cousin to do everything --- never once redoing anything or scolding her, only teaching her fine points now & then. Ultimately, that girl was wonderful in arranging her room, ironing her clothes, organising her daily routine, minimising wastage in kitchen etc. etc. and all her class mates in college hostel , were so amazed & really looked up to her .

    Vowing to myself, not to be like my mother -- I've started guiding my 5 yr. old little girl to do small things around the house --- loading a small amount of clothes in washing machine, setting up & clearing up table after dinner, keeping folded clothes in each person's shelf in the right place, making the beds etc. etc. She is totally enjoying it & daily follows me around , enthusiastically ------- yes sometimes, her folded clothes look more crumpled ; but i happily thank her & once she is napping / gone out to park to play, then i refold them !! I see to it that in her presence, i do not burst her bubble of confidence & willingness to help . The one thing , even I've run out of ideas to make her do is -- the perennial problem , of cleaning up her room ........that alone she has absolutely no interest:icon_frown: , whatever methods i try !!

    Love,
    Dew.
     
  10. Sindhuja

    Sindhuja Silver IL'ite

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    Hi Dew,
    Thanks for sharing with me with your experience. My mom used to be the same. Whenever her monthly friend visits her , i have to cook (started from 11 or 12 ). After those days when my mom comes into the kitchen, she used to shout like this is not clean and that is not clean (but i thought it was very clean). My dad used to comfort me. She never praised me for cooking for those three days. I used to keep in mind her complaints and corrected it every month. But coz of my mom, i learned to cook, to keep everything clean etc.... Now, my d (13) is helping me, but i have to do it again coz i have a brand new house and i try to maintain it well . I don't shout at her but i tell her patiently. I make her cook when i am not well or when i am busy. Otherwise i do it. I think i have to be more patient and let her more often in the kitchen.
    Thank you all for sharing your experiences.
    regards
     

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