Do You Feel Happy?

Dear Sir,

very interesting topic of eternal relevance. Are we happy? I seem to go with the unequivocal response. Yes, I am extremely grateful - I have a roof over my head, good food to eat (in fact too much!!! :-D), decent clothes to wear, domestic help to make sure my daily routine runs like clockwork. Can't complain.

BUT, I feel frustrated that my activities are limited and I can't achieve all I wish to or could even 10 years ago. It makes me feel 'not good enough'. Especially when super senior citizens about 2 decades older than me do so well. I feel annoyed and upset that my limitations are coming in the way of my ability to continue working like before. So can I say I am happy? Yes, but ..... I can count my blessings - I can still walk, I can still take care of myself, I am not dependent on others for taking care of myself personally.

Who is happy? Married or unmarried people? As the proverb in Hindi goes : Shaadi ka laddoo khaaye woh bhi roye, na khaaye woh bhi roye. If happiness is internal, why do people need to get married at all? Find the joy inside oneself. Why do we need children to make us happy? After all there are no guarantees in life.

So I feel the unequivocal answers are the most honest ones. I don't know about other countries, but Pakistan's position certainly surprised me no end!!!

 

Super jotting on Happiness. I enjoyed reading it twice.

Happiness is only momentous stays - for short time - as unhappiness is close on heel to grab the mind and trounce crush its state of gladness or happiness in a jiffy.

I think there is nothing called eternal or absolute happiness. It is derived only by comparison with others. It is always between haves and have-nots.
Many mistake pleasure for happiness. Material possessions doesn't cause happiness though they provide comfort for a while.

Kids in hamlets play happily in gutter and unhygienic surroundings as there knowledge boundary is limited. They seem to be happy.

Compared to affluent community in skyscrapers those serving them staying nearby in makeshift tents are far more rejoicing.

But it is said often that if one is determined to be happy none can spoil it. Under blazing sun, a hand cart puller scantily dressed is seen in profound sleep over a culvert. It looks one is in absolute happiness only while in deep sleep.

The ingredients for momentary happiness seems to be only a few which are basic needs like food, shelter and clothing.

Voters are happy for a while when they come to know they are entitled or qualified for obtaining freebies from govt coffers. Later come to know the got to pay enhanced fees for the electric supply and they turn sad .
It is always ROBBING peter to pay PAUL. To give happiness to few or to enrich few one has to put some other category of persons impoverished or poorer.
Even in heavens it looks none of the Gods or Goddesses seem to be happy. They too seems to have instalment of sorrow session and limited "happiness". There too politicking spoil the happiness Index of heavens. A naughty boy was momentarily happy when he wrote underneath "Jesus Saves" the following. - call others spend".
Coming to myself, I must say am generally keep mind in happy disposition and be smiling. I thank god that am now partially deaf in one year and totally hard of hearing on my right.
Whenever she speaks harsh to me from my right, I smile and show happy face. So I tried to be on her left to remain happy.
Happy reminds be the old ale song

 

Interesting thread.

To answer the question, Are you happy?, it’s important to first understand what happiness truly means.

Happiness is a multifaceted emotion, encompassing positive feelings like contentment, joy, and fulfilment. It’s a state of mind characterized by purpose, satisfaction, and a sense of well-being.

According to the global happiness index, Sri Lanka ranks 128, just two spots behind India. Fortunately, my time in Sri Lanka is limited, and I can confidently say that I personally rank much higher on the happiness scale. Yes, I am happy.

Happiness isn’t just about feeling content or grateful for what you have; it’s about cultivating a purposeful state of mind, achieving goals, and finding satisfaction in what you do or aspire to do. There’s no universal formula for happiness—it’s deeply personal.

For me, a significant source of happiness lies in planning. The process itself brings immense joy, sometimes even more than the actual event. For example, Christmas is my favourite time of year. By mid-November, I dive into preparations: applying for long leaves, buying gifts, hunting for deals during Black Friday, enjoying Christmas markets, decorating the house, making sweets, and planning for the big day.

The anticipation and the lead-up to Christmas are the most joyful moments for me. I feel like an excited child, savouring every detail. However, when Christmas Day finally arrives, I often find myself a bit tired, slightly stressed, and less healthy after all the late nights. Ironically, the day itself isn’t as enjoyable as the journey leading up to it.

Knowing this, I make it a point to relish the process completely, which makes me feel happy.

On the other hand, I notice that many people don’t approach happiness the same way. They wait for a grand reason to enjoy life and often end up missing out entirely. Because it is conditional, and the result is often not in your hand.

In Sri Lanka, happiness is often conditional—tied to specific achievements or societal expectations. You’re not expected to feel happy about scoring average marks, being middle class, staying unmarried past a certain age, or having no children. Happiness here is frequently linked to external factors like lifestyle, social status, and family circumstances—things that are often beyond one’s control.

Given this mindset, it’s not surprising that we rank so low on the happiness index.

 

Today my maidservant was happy and bubbly because she had paid the monthly emi towards a loan ! Whereas my friend was happy because he had done a pooja ritual successfully! My student was happy because she wrote her exam very well and she has 3 days before the next exam.

But do we really understand the word “Happiness”. Is it a permanent state of your being or is it a response to the external stimuli at every second of the day?
If you create a x-y graph with the state of being on the y-axis and time on the x-axis, is it a steady line parallel to the x axis (No changes in any situation)

Happiness as I understand, is आनन्द but आनन्द is something you find when you feel one with the universe. It is a choice you make every second of your life. It is a decision NOT a response. It is at the soul level!

Whereas सुख and दुख are comfort and discomfort - they are day-to-day things that affect your senses, body, mind!

So, to answer your question - Am I happy ? Yes 100 % happy.

Am I in comfort? I can show you 10 places where my body aches, 20 things that I am worried about, 35 things that I am not satisfied about, 50 things that others have not done for me and a 1000 things the government could do better!

But I dont dwell on them! I dont let them define my day, I limit them to momentary pricks while I feel joyful everyday and keep my sense of humour at all the tiny pricks !

आनन्द is my background process - it is always there.

I will explain: As a mother, if you had fever, you will deal with the fever but your first thought is whether your child will be fine without you… and after you get well, your first thought is to check about your child

As a student if you had fever, your first thought would be what are the classes/exams you are going to miss, and after you get well, your first thought is to cover up the portions you missed!

So the fever is your situation, but being the mother or student is your background process.

For me, आनन्द is my background process - always smiling, always happy - life’s little discomforts are the fevers that come and go and I deal with them then and there and dont brood! My soul is in आनन्द always

Keep smiling
HR

 

Dear SLN Sir,

Three important things contribute to mental happiness. 1) Gratitude, 2) Acceptance, and 3) Peace. If our mind develops GAP over a period of time, mental happiness becomes possible for the human beings. Our mind is filled with Kama, Krodha, Loba, Moha, Mada & Matsariya which are inflicting pain. Even though Adi Sankara taught us Janthunam Narajanmam Dhurlabam meaning "It is rare to get a human birth", the human life is wasted in pursuit of happiness from the external stimulant. The animals don't have discrimination as the human beings but they don't have Arishadvargas.

The power of discrimination which is associated with free will provided to the human being is grossly misused by the human beings. The path to liberation is suggested as Dharma, Artha, Kama & Moksha in Sanatana Dharma but the human life pursue mostly Artha and Kama as the way to pursue happiness. Dharma is like a choice in the examination question and Moksha has become a subject of discussion only in discourses or to demonstrate one's credibility as a scholar in spirituality.

The question we need to address is whether happiness is a state of mind or state of consciousness? As long as we talk about happiness pursued from state of mind, then pair of opposite will occure as pleasure and pain are two sides of the same coin. A day will come when humanity will understand the inherent quality of Consciousness is Sathya, Dharma, Shanti, Prema, and Ahimsha and when it is in that state it is always blissful. If we dig deep into five sheaths, the last sheath is Anandamaya Kosha after Annamala, Pranamaya, Manomaya, and Vijananamaya Koshas. We need to reverse engineer if our inherent Consciosuness is blissful, why we feel unhappy at the mental level? Therefore, the work to feel happy is inward and not in the outside world. Pain points are in desires and attachments which create instability along with anger and fear.

If we develop the habit of expressing gratitude for what we have, accept things as it happens knowing pair of opposites are inevitable, and aim to have peace constantly unaffected by mental turbulances, even our worldly experience through mind will be happier. State of mind to state of consciousness is a long journey and one knows how to achieve happiness in real world, the journey to reach permanent happiness becomes easier. As I mentioned elsewhere, the state of happiness in Turya State is Zillion times more than the state of happiness felt by the mind in real world according to Taitriya Upanishad.

 

Dear @sln sir,
Here is another perspective of happyness


I am happy to watch boarding into train here