I would like to know how you deal with people (friends/relatives etc) who take favors but never return but also expect more ? I have handled this issue very well so far but would like to get better. This long distance friend used to be my college mate and we keep in touch many years later. Once she backed out when I needed her the most emotionally. She said she cannot understand what I'm trying to say whereas I felt it was not rocket science. I told her it is easy to lend an ear to the person in need , which she found it hard to do. Based on our friendship, we used to devote time to each other no matter what. That incident made me question the closeness. I find myself moving away from her ( I know she has sensed it too but doesn't express). She has this uber-cool show off attitude that she's a cool lady in the most tense situations, whereas I believe in confiding true feelings with few close ones. Our phone calls frequency has reduced now. Recently, she was in a tense situation - what to say - exactly as I was earlier - I tried to help in the best way I could over the phone and she immediately became clingy indicating she would need me for advising her. I totally do not get this. People forget they cannot give to others but so easily switch to being on receiving end as if its their right , forget about returning favors.