Distrust-disrespect-suspicious Situation

Hello all,
Married for 10 years and nothing went fine.I am basically a very adventurous,composed and interesting person by nature and thats the main reason for my husband to fall for me.Blame it on me i was not sure what i want in a relationship just he proposed me i told my parents and we got married. But as i was getting into the relationship i was so confused and coz of pressure had kids and finally found my stance and decided to get a career by pursuing masters in abroad which was my long term wish and with my parents support(to look after my kids and financial support) i completed my masters. At the very beginning i was so homesick and hated mysefl everyday for deciding for masters abroad. As days passed i calmed myself and tried to focus on the purpose and then gained good frnds and things were fine.There was this african guy in my class proposed me even after knowing i am married and with kids. I rejected but later we became good frnds and academics made us close and we formed a frnds group who were supportive to each other with academics and working part time and balancing life.which made me more strong and i discovered myself there to be honest. This guys was always on his toes for me at anytime. Surprised me on my bdy. always cares for me and i clearly told him my mind that am not looking for any rship rather a good frnd. But i do flirt,we hug when we see and depart and share many life issues and he is like a life skill advisor for few of our frnds. Later when i had visited back home i missed him so much we share emails whatsap calls and used to discuss about the upcoming project, kids, his plans and happenings with love and care. My husband has seen me talking over fone.He has seen him during video calls and i went bck to my school after vacation. Then the guy wanted to get some visa so for some deal he booked a hotel for visa purpose and cancelled.He has sent me a copy coz he booked under my name and his name.he booked another room with my name and cancelled. And before i depart we surprised one of our frnd by gifting them a hotel stay for a night but i used mine and his name for the booking with my details as i wanted to surprise them. And everything was in my email.I know it but i was least bothered how it could create a hurricane later. And after completing the course this guys arranged for a send off party,by then he had got a girlfriend since 6 months to get the right to stay in the country. He arranged for the party at her place and she knows well that he likes me and am leaving the country so i was forced for a good bye kiss and i pecked in his cheek and his gf pictured it and i flew bck home. I noticed his gf has kept that picture as her whatsapp prof pic that was really nice and i saved it in my phone. My fone pwd is know to all at home kids and husband. We hardly share laptop,as i use the laptop my passwords are saved.
My sex life with my husband is a complete off even before my masters.I was not showing much interest in sex life.We had other issues which made me choose to get a job of my own and almost every single happening between me and my husband killed that attachment part in me.He pushed me far away when i was in his feet to be frank.Now he wonders why am not making love to him. I have clearly explained him that my intention at the very moment is to get a job and stabilize myself. Also i feel like making love is goin to make me weaker towards him and lose myself and be a stupid again which i dont want. Coz women secrete a hormone during making love which will make us feel attach more emotionally. I was a wallflower once taking all shits and crying all nights.Now i am good enough to say no,put myself a priority and a new strong me.

....And so my passwords are open in my phone and my laptop ,my husband has gone through everything and one fine morning he said pack your stuffs and go to your parents place i will come and pick sme day. I was wondering why suddenly? he said think what u did.Nothing strikes my mind. Later he sent me that kiss pic and lots of pics of the hotel booking emails along with few emails where i have said miss you,hug me(!!?) and few voice notes where he said he miss me and whataspp screenshots which i have saved those were honestly flirting and discussing about men and women psychology. He just wanted me to get out of the house else he will take this issue to my parents.I consider this as petty.Later he asked me i explained him,i know kissing might be a wrong thing,but the other things i hv explained him patiently and clearly. He is not patient enough to undertstand the situation rather cooking up stories and calling me names, and I'm accepting his anger but couldnt accept the accuse.

where i went wrong? shouldnt a woman have a man from a different culture be friend ?

PS:- I used to email a lot and call a lot my husband during the course, seeking help regarding his view but he never responded .I used to tell my husband about the problem i am facing during intial days he always skip that part and go deaf.Then i understood i should mingle with my classmates to learn things and gained a few good hearts and now those emails and stuffs are bothering much.
hammer me , judge me, Honestly am not trying to save my rship wit my husband coz,if not for kids am not in this marriage at all. i hv had enough already.The thing is i dont want to let my parents down and be a bad example for allowing me to go extra miles to pursue my dreams after years of marriage. I dont want to end my rship with this as an issue.

Advice me what should i do? am open to all of your high low medium toned advices.
Thanks.