disappointed with gender

Discussion in 'Pregnancy & Labor' started by unluckyme, Feb 2, 2011.

  1. Spiderman1

    Spiderman1 Gold IL'ite

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    Ok, your apology accepted. When we read your thread folks can get emotional.

    Good to see you've realized. Best wishes to you and your daughter. :thumbsup
     
    Last edited: Feb 5, 2011
  2. lotusgirl

    lotusgirl Senior IL'ite

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    i am glad unlucky has realised how lucky she is.. glad this thread could help her too..
    But with due respects to Spiderman & others whose posts i do enjoy & appreciate, i would not term this thread as ridiculous..

    she just reflects the thoughts of many women in India & thats the plain truth..Atleast she sought of ways to find answers & solve her issues & doubts.. i fully empathise with her, becuase its her situation which made her feel so.. her non understanding husband is the main person to be blamed for such a feeling in her, becuase she as a daughter to her mother has to hide and help or do anything for her own mum.. thats the ridiculousness of this whole post & not the original posters thoughts...
     
  3. Spiderman1

    Spiderman1 Gold IL'ite

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    ^ Sorry, but I disagree. Taking out your frustration on an unborn baby is downright asinine. And for a mom to say she wants to 'reject' her baby, that's one of the harshest indictments for the kid. She needs to show the frustration to the folks that cause it, not on an innocent child.

    There are just so many (some on IL, many not on IL) who are not yet blessed to have one.

    Anyway, she hopefully got the point, but I will not be able to accept any justification for such behavior as explained in the above post. She has apologized and one hopes that she has learnt to appreciate the baby now.
     
    Last edited: Feb 6, 2011
  4. Jananikrithsan

    Jananikrithsan Gold IL'ite

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    May you be blessed with a healthy bundle of joy!
    Take care and all the very best for a safe delivery!
    Lucky princess you lil girl will be!
     
  5. Tinaj

    Tinaj New IL'ite

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    Thank God!! You are feeling Lucky!!
    I literally got tears in my eyes for your baby girl when i read your post!

    Have a safe and happy delivery!


    Tina
     
  6. mayachaudhuri

    mayachaudhuri Senior IL'ite

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    So Sorry..
    Couldnt stop myself from replying.
    My brother left my parents in their old age leaving them to fend for themselves and me to take care of them.
    My cousin brother left my aunt and now she is taken care by her daughter and son in law.
    My uncle left my grandpa to be taken care by my aunt and my mom.

    I am just horrified by what you think.

    In this age in India i think daughters are a boon because the way sons are brought up ..so pampered and spoilt ....they dont think twice before leaving their parents in dire straits...
    If I can give 3 examples out of many in my family..I can well imagine how many are there in India.
    If you are so worried..then just make sure you earn enough and save enough for retiring to an old age home or an institution.

    I am not yet a mother but I would love to be a mother of a daughter and not a son.

    God help you and your baby who is not to be blamed at all way.
     
  7. shruthipraveen

    shruthipraveen Platinum IL'ite

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    I'm so happy you posted this topic , got replies and now changed your attitude.

    I had wanted a baby girl when I was pregnant and was blessed with one. Even before my pregnancy happened, I used to stare at all those lovely frocks in a shop and sigh to myself. I conceived after 3.7.5 yrs of marriage after some fertility treatments. Babies are PRECIOUS, boy or girl!!!
    Do post ur lil one's pics.
    Good luck to you for everything!
     
  8. Want2BMom

    Want2BMom Senior IL'ite

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    i was wondering what wud be the lil girl's reaction if she were to read these post and understand it was a thread started by her mom and she was the crux of the thread ....just a thought though
     
  9. bittenkitten

    bittenkitten Senior IL'ite

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    I'm actually a little concerned about the original poster's statement that she has to "hide" her support for her mother, and furthermore requires permission from her husband to go see her family. Am I reading too much into this or does this sound like spousal abuse to anyone else?
    I may have lived abroad my entire life, but my parents were born and brought up in India. My parents have support each other's family for as long as they've been earning money, and never had my mother needed to request permission from my father to go see her family. I am an only child - a girl - and I was raised to look after my parents regardless of my own gender. The man I married loves my parents and pays them as much respect as he does his own.
    Just my two cents: again, perhaps I am misunderstanding the common marital situation in India, but I have family there of my own generation, and I haven't seen this sort of rigidity among them, either...
     
  10. billybob

    billybob Gold IL'ite

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    In my line of work of all communities I have seen, only African Americans as a whole community are truly happy to have a girl child. It is very difficult to find AA baby girl for adoption (I was informed by social worker). Parents invest more on their girls than boys.
     
    Last edited: Feb 10, 2011

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