Hi I am silent reader of this forum past 2 yrs.. today this midnight i want to write all those i m getting thru from 1 st day of marriage.. I am from very normal middle class family my husbany is middle class too after marriage he got very good job and now are leading luxurious life.. Abt he .. he is good person but very bad husband.. what he knows all is just his safety, and world no 1 selfish.. very moody .. and home bird.. dont want to open window atleast in the weekend.. from day 1 he never cares abt my wish n opinion.. just treated me as a machine.. dont know how to make me smile, all the times he wants hot,fresh food 3 times a day.. never compromises in food.. he wants very spicy n hot and doesnt like outside food.. i like sweets very much but he didnt show any interest when i prepared sweet dish.. ok i adjusted he doesnt want to take my outside.. even to the honey moon.. if he is in good mood take me out very very rarely ok i adjusted we were in another state due to his job but whenever he feels bore to stay iwith me!!!!! he suddenly calls her mom and booked a ticket for me not even asking 1 word ..ok i adjusted.. i stuggled a lot in the time of delivery after that also suffered from post partum depression ... another problem is my kid is very very hyperactive and cries all the time without any reason 1 and 1/2 years i didnt sleep well but he never cares abt me and my kid and didnt give any emotional support too... ok i adjusted.. weekly all the days i have to cook what he likes.. no other option.. i like outside food as i tried of routine cooking and lot of times i begged him to take me outside for food.. but never cares.. coz he doesnt like.. ok i adjusted.. after 4 yrs of marriage we came here (US).. after that i m daily crying and depressed all the times i just want to break all the items like hysteria patient bcoz of his negligence.. sometimes. he speaks well rarely take us outside... from morn to even i m waiting for him.. and as soon as he entered home he asked me 'have u did anything usefully or just sit '??? i broke down totally every time he asked... and just doing work like robot went to bed... another problem is if i go to bed at 10 he will come at 11.30 or 12.00 only never care or think abt me .. 3 months once just have sex very mechanically .. i never felt happy.. in those.. i begged him countless time pl come early to bed.. i will wait for u.. i need to talk atleast dont want any physical relationship when he is not in mood... but he never cares.. just sit before tv or laptop... my parents are not rich so sometimes he helps.. i feel very happy abt that... but my happiness is a price for that?.. everybody in india thinking i m living like queen no more disturbance and lot of free time.. etc etc.. ok socially i m living somewhat well but personally? dont i deserve to be happy?????