Delicate Issue

It is understandable but it’s ur sis just tell her to help u with cooking ..
Does she come when ur husband visits u guys??.maybe she is thinking that she is coming to give u company so u don’t feel lonely at home during weekends as u r busy otherwise..
I would say tell her how u feel say her to give u space ..

 

I'm guessing she is not employed? If so, then she's alone most of the week. That probably drives her desire for your company during the weekends.

In an Indian context, I have found such situations difficult. Any move to carve out personal time or space is seen as distancing. These are vestiges of our traditional communal living arrangements. For the longest time, my father considered a closed door as an exclusionary move! I had to blame the squirrel cheeping outside, loudly and insistently, all day every day. (If that bushy-tailed rodent would put the same energy into learning English, he'd be the first squirrel at Harvard). So, my excuse was a need for peace and quiet to get some work done. Now, after many years, he gets it.

I like this. Phrasing it this way will account for the change in your interaction with her. It will let you go on about that kid next door who's a bad influence (remember, all kids except our own are a malign influence, save the ones who get into IIT). You can bang on about how that other kid got into drugs, and that girl over in the next building ran off with some guy who doesn't even have a B.E., and about how you want to make sure your son/daughter stays out of trouble.

So, responsible parenting is an excellent excuse. Kids these days - they grow up so fast! Not like us.
You can ask your sister about her parenting strategies, her kids' teen years blah, blah. If she is a reliable babysitter, you can ask her to keep an eye on one while you step out with the other; then, a few weeks later, go out with both children while she stays home or comes over for dinner that you can order out, whatever.

If you do this in a way that makes her feel included and wanted, you can get her to understand. Eventually.

 

3 days a week?

Complain so and so health issues and as need to take rest etc.. make them used to this practice..

if she understands and invite you for stay/stop frequent visits/taking care of kids, then good...

If not, reasons may vary, but trust me she is using you...

 

Some ideas:

• Kids are bored and want to go somewhere.. so, we'll come to your place this weekend....
• I have some errands to run, please watch the kids and give them the dinner on the table, and oh! make dosa for older one, She doesn't like rice.
• We are going to XX place, want to meet us there?
• Oh good, you are here, I was feeling overwhelmed trying to make too many.. can you make this Sambar while I make this idli. ....... Clean these greens and wash and chop them while you watch TV. Done? ok, cut onions then...
• I really like your Biriyani (or whatever difficult recipe), Can you make it today?
• I am so tired, I'll take a nap while you keep an eye on the kids. (Or maybe kids have a nap too)
• I have to work from home this weekend. Can we meet up next week?

Soon you'll be asking us, 'My sister doesn't come home at all, I miss her, what do I do?'

 

Is she your cousin sister or sibling? Usually siblings will pitch in no matter what. But I can understand. I had been to my mom's house last month and she was getting stressed. In spite of me trying to pick on some tasks, she would stop me from doing them. She did not like doing certain things, but she did not want my involvement in those tasks. I too kept quiet because I knew I was going to leave soon. I suggest you start delegating tasks to your sister. If she is okay, she will make it easy for you. If not, she will back out herself.