I really love my job Rihana..so i am trying a lot to somehow do better and stay put However this boss lady has zero patirlence, dosent understand what goes in office as she is remote.. It give sme anxiety to hesr the phone bell ring everyday! She yells and slams phone down ..dosent know to communicate.: Boss is supporotve of me so i try to go to hik and give inputs. But today that boss lady told me not to go to him and deal with her directly. Nothing works eithbher.Even if am right she changes subject or slams phone down.. I thought am good at my job an dhave so much passion..obviously am learning and doinf a lot..but. She is not right which i know for sure.. Dont know what to do.. But as u said:. Maybe thats why previous people quit..boss said all worked maximum two years.. But she praises all those people who worked before me and compares me.. But i dont think am all that bad this time. Am struggling to keep my job but her shrill voice ,yelling and rudeness gives me anxiety. Am gonna see for few mote months,. Its like one small mistale i shouldnt make..she will go bonkers!! People make mistakes even after years of experience for sure! This boss lady dosent care and its not like she is perfect! My problem is i feel like that same little gurl being yelled by a school principal! My inner child is screaming! Anyways.. I want to build a temple for each and everyone of the previous ladies now!
We should never attach with any company or job. We should build our skills strong and be marketable. If it's really stressful start building your new resume and look for another job. Nothing is worth your peace of mind. Be confident. Convey your concerns to your boss directly in detail may be in email. Don't have fear.
I am sorry to disagree with you @Rihana. It is true that the lady boss is behaving so negative because of her own struggles or whatever. But ignoring is not the answer to the OP's struggle. Our society often give such advice to the women when they struggle with an abusive partner in marriage. Unless it is physical abuse that makes the women dread living in the house, they are advised to adjust, ignore and if possible vent their frustrations with their FOO or friends, but not to make any rash decisions. As a result, women in our part of the world have grown thick skin and are able to tolerate any nonsense in their marriage, including disrespect, psychological abuse etc as they are wired to not make any rash decisions unless it is physical abuse. I would rather advise them to trust their gut feelings, and assess their comfortability be it in a marriage or work place. The OP's below statements are clear that she isn't comfortable at all. Either, her tolerance for bullying and abuse is very high or she is extremely uncomfortable to fight against injustice. Yelling, and being rude to the level of making the staff member anxious to meet their boss is not normal. It should be tolerated in a workplace unless your financial struggle is more serious than what it is in the office. Given the fact that the OP has a bitter past related to school and college bullying which has affected her social skills to a considerable level (read her old posts), I wouldn't advice her to put up with another round of bullying at work place which makes her inner child scream for an escape. Such situations can aggravate her PTSD, and make her emotionally weak down the line.
Hey @SGBV, good to see your response! No need to apologize for disagreeing—I can see the wisdom in what you're saying. I hope our responses give OP a variety of opinions and suggestions to consider. My suggestion of "ignore unless you dread going to work" is very specific to this situation and shouldn't be extrapolated to all work environments or troubled marriages. I based my advice on these factors: The workplace is a family business. The cranky, tough lady boss is remote and not physically present in the office. The job likely lacks a neatly documented job description, formal performance reviews, or structured 1:1 meetings. OP is not desperate for the job. OP otherwise enjoys the work. OP has previously walked away from jobs when needed. From OP’s description, the workplace seems informal, with a somewhat hazy job structure. Because of that, the usual workplace strategies of rephrase instructions, have constructive conversation, minding body language, taking relevant courses, delivery high-quality work, seek guidance from experienced professionals, utilize technology may not fully apply here.
Dear OP, please start a thread on the new megahit show Adolescence. If I start thread, it will languish, you start, it will get responses.
