Dd Is Too Soft Spoken..

I am always bullied in school,work and sometimes by my MIL. It will be helpful to read warrior stories to instill confidence in a child. Being soft always hurts.

 

Kids, either soft spoken or ow, need reassurance from their parents that their feelings and behaviour is justified.

However, it is the responsibility of the parent to ensure the tools they require for their launch in the ‘Real World’.

Some of the things we can maybe, do in the interest of our children, is ( thinking aloud is more like the points I have jotted them below; not that I am able to follow these all the time )

1. Give them our complete trust. Once they feel secure, they will feel more comfortable in communicating their feelings to us.

2. We need to constantly re-inforce that repeated efforts will give rewards surely

3. We, while assuring that , all in life is not fair, do need to reiterate that all in life is also not unfair

4. Not harp on negatives of any other child/family. We never know when which element/word /association kids may pick and bury in their sub- conscience . Children to tend to internalise, and this may also lead to children holding back their own feelings when with parents, as they may feel that this might not be an appeasing positive trait to their own parents.

5. In fact, do not give much weight to the negative actions of other children, which we feel upset our children ( very tough). However, if it is a severe case of bullying, you need to take appropriate action. In my experience, however, the parents of bullies do generally have their own issues too and are un-receptive to other people's complaints. Expose kids to as little contact with bullies as possible and if it is in school, report it to the teachers and other authority .

5. Try to expose children to potential positive role models

6. Consciously, try to relate positive brave stories of overcoming adversity

7. Pick up specific activities that may be suited for our children and develop their skill, so that they feel confident about themselves. I have heard that group sports does work really well to lift confidence!

8. I don’t know how to identify the specific interests of kids, but I would try to settle them in a host of activities to figure out the ones that sustain interest most.

9. Share our personal stories about school, home when we were their age.

 

Yes, soft spoken kids are more prone to bullying.
I'm speaking from personal experience as I was an extremely soft spoken, polite and well behaved kid..and have been bullied a lot..u can't believe to what extent kids can go to put down other kids whom they consider weak..
I've been physically attacked by other girls my age during middle school..
The reasons this continued is because my parents didn't make any efforts to improve my self esteem and confidence and never took my concerns regarding bullies seriously..they were cought up with their own problems.
No one ever taught me how to deal with them and give them back in their own language,.had anyone given a little attention to me i would have survived bullying better.
You know, other kids had convinced me that I was a fat, ugly and stupid person who deserved to be bullied..though it was absolutely untrue. I never could realise my potential.
You mentioned in other thread about your kid asking questions about skin colour..you know of course that skin colour is something that causes superiority or inferiority complex in kids.
Now you know what you are not supposed to do..
So please make your kid as a brave, bold and confident individual who can face all situations of life...listen to all her concerns and spend quality time with her to mould her into a courageous person. its in your hands.