Daag Ache Hote Hai

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Daag Ache Hote Hai​

There is this Surf Excel Ad that irritates me no end. I am watching the cricket matches, and this ad come repeatedly. In the class, the teacher is absent , and the students come to know, that her dog has died, and she is absent because of it.


One of the students goes to the teacher, and to cheer her up, behaves like a dog, on all his four, goes down, and even lifts his leg to pee on the bushes, which makes the sad teacher laugh. And he is dirty, and the teacher hugs him in the end, and she too gets dirty.And Shabhana Azmi’s voice comes and says “ Daag ache Hote Hai “


Dettol says daag and dirt and not good, and u must avoid them.Now who is right , even I am confused.See the more dirt u have, the more soap u will use, so this way, HLL will have more sales of Surf. Some bright MBA must have thought of this strategy, God bless him .


If I was an employee of HLL I would wear dirty clothes to office, which stink too
The left part of the shirt will be dirty, very dirty, and the right side will be shining white.If scolded I will tell the bosses, that I am doing a good advt for yr p roduct, and u better give me a raise ! These guys will be visible from far, and they will be the walking advertisement for the company.


Well even Harsha is into all this. Let me tell u how. She goes to Satsang, and she keeps eating my head to come.Her guru was here a fortnight back and around 2,00,000 people attended. She has the pull and got me the first row pass, I mean where the Chief Minister, The IG, and other big shots sit, right at the front, but I refused.Once she dragged me , and I fell asleep, listening to the drone, of No Kababa, No Sharaba, u will go to hell etc.And the guy sitting next to me gave me a nudge in the ribs, as it seems I was snoring and right in the front row, the saint watching me.



So I avoid. And I tell her, Harsha your going is enough there. You go and clean the sins thati have committed , as a dutiful wife, we need just one dhobi in the house, and u are doing a nice job of it. So I try and commit a lot of sins, like yakking with female bloggers, posting naughty jokes, eyeing the females in the park, and a few things I wont mention here. So the chaddar, that is the bedsheet gets pretty dirty,.and she goes and prays to her Guru, and the bedsheet is washed every week. So we two comliment each other, I dirty, and she cleans, with her spiritual Surf ! The dirtier the clothes, the more the money is worth spending on getting it clean, or better still drycleaned.


Who would be stupid to send a spotless white cloth for washing, surf or no surf eh ! But it will take her years to understand what I mean. I cant listen to Guru’s preachings, for I am uneducated, so cant understand what they say.Harsha’s Guru, is among the few ones that I like, there are no posters when he comes, no loudspeakers, no movie is taken out of his, nor any audio cassettes.


Whenever there is no good programme to watch at night on Cable, I go to Sanskar Channel, and watch Muni Tarun Sagar, and his high pitch notes amuse me no end.Yesterday Sri Sri was live on Sanskar, and it was very organized, Shankar Mahadevan singing some bhajans, ladies singing with him in chourus, the audience in same coloured clothes, but Sri said nothing, was just smiling, and wearing a Red Rajasthani Pagri. People are so mersemerized, they lose their own power of thinking, and will blindly follow what their Guru tells them.


Surf Excell is good, and so are gurus. One washes the stains, the other the sins.But I am a hopeless case, beyond redemption , I want to go to Hell, for Hell has everything that I desire.


And I have told Harsha, with corruption abounding in Hell, I will arrange a pass and come meet her sometimes, for old times sake ! She takes comfort in that.


I know all my blogger friends will be in Heaven, but don’t u worry, I wont leave u there too, will come and bore u there, with talks of the babes at my place.


With those blessings of mine to u all, See u in the next blog,


KAMAL MAHTANI




Sorrow is our constant companion , Happiness comes and goes

Santa read this and told Banta

“ My wife is always with me, My Saali comes and goes





A Man is told he has 24 hours to live.
He asks his wife , if he can make love one last time.
Crying and Upset, she agrees,a nd they have a mindblowing time.


After 12 hours, he again asks her, she agrees , and a great time follows

After 18 hours again he pesters his wife for one last time.

This time she blows her fuse and Yells “ You stupid moron, I am not being rude, but I have to get up in the morning, you don’t !

 

Dear Viji,

Thanks for the first comments as usual.I guess the only good thing i do, is to make u all laugh, and forget the day's sorrow:biglaugh

Dont worry dear Sis,i will come and regale u all , even if we are on opposite side of the fence.HAHA.

Regards

kamal

 

Dear Mindi,

See Harsha is so cooperative , she takes the trouble to wiash my sins, every week without fail.:biglaugh

Swear i fall asleep, i feel so bored with the sermons, they all hae the same topics, dont do bad, dont eat meat, dont drink etc etc.I have heard it a umpteen times before.

Just imagine if i become a Guru, live satsangs,and on TV, no one will get a chance to sleep, everybody will be laughing every minute, i will tell everyone

Eat Drink and Fart,
For that too is an Art.:biglaugh

these gurus dont have a sense of humour, they scare u, they think veg people, are good, they dont steal, cheat, or rape, and all these things are done by people like me.

And i will tell all the followers of mine " Daag Ache Hote Hai " Commit sins and come and wash them with me, and be clean again:rotfl:rotfl:rotfl

And well as u can see from my karmas, all the Gurus will curse me, and make sure io go to hell.

and Mindi, since u and other ilites are mostly Veg, and dont make fun of Gurus, u will all surely go to Heaven, but dont worry, i will take out a pass, and come and bore u all over there, we will form our own group out there.

HAHA.

thanks for the lovely FB.

Regards

kamal

 

Dear Pads,

Naughty Naughty Pads.:rotfl:rotfl:rotflWhat a classy joke.I will make sure i wont step on a duck be rest assured.HAHAHAHAHAHA

Well , who knows if there is heaven orhell, but well since we belive they exist, well , so we contingue to spin stories eh !

thanks for the lovely FB, superb.Regards

kamal