Consciously Raising More Aware Children

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Dear Satchitananda, Your observation is correct.There is much hype and over doing of traditional things overseas.I asked a gentleman abut 40 who was reciting sri Rudram in Mahalakshmi temple, Boston.On seeing me ,he smiled and asked," mami, madrasaa?'
During the course of conversation I asked him how was it that a person of his age was reciting Rudram almost daily in the temple- and it is quite uncommon in India.
He conveyed in a low tone," mami, I tell you frankly. my son aged 14 feels very much that he has no girl friends and somehow girls never talk to him' I am praying Lord Shiva to associate my son with a good girl friend as somebody told that if Rudram is chanted, one's wish will be fulfilled.
See, how the tradition has taken us this far.
I think this is the way it works. Having brought up in village with a huge temple, I have seen festivities , but there was no obsession. After coming to Chennai, I see that so much paraphernalia is attached to sankata Hara chaturthi and pradosha worships in Chennai. In US we see many more such elaborations with multipurpose prayers too. World is funny.
jayasala 42

 

During the BHO presidency in the USA, Sri Rudhram was chanted in the White House Theater:

 

That is just hilarious! This of course sounds like an extreme case. But there are also people who question and want to genuinely know about our epics, mythology etc. It is refreshing to see that there are youngsters who question and try to understand and then use their 'viveka' to accept or reject.

 

OP, sorry to digress the discussion

@jayasala42 mam

I hope this was just mentioned for fun. Oru paanai sotrukku oru soru patham alla.

With all due respect to your wisdom and knowledge I am not writing this to offend you but anyone who does not reside here has the chance of mistaking it.

Living in this country for decades I know how children are raised here. I respect those parents who give their culture traditions and everything they grew up to these children to carry forward. We all do the best of our ability to give our cultural values and scriptures to our children. I have never told my children to pray for any material or personal benefits and I am sure many parents like me would have done the same.

Chanting Rudrams celebrating Sivaratri participating in akanda Vishnu Sahasranama parayanam celebrating skandha sashti performing varalakshmi pooja participating in Ayyapa mandala pooja many of us do it because we like it or we are also learning and we want to give our children some connection to our roots. I know many kids who say Rudram go to Veda camps and know more mythological stories.

This Mahalakshmi temple or any other such temple has given us a home far away ; has given us a family to rely on ; has provided opportunities to learn appreciate our scriptures and grow internally; has taught us many slokas pooja vidhanams like eldes in our family ;has provided us solace and comfort in crisis. This is our home and way of life. Please do not ridicule it.

 

Dear Lakshmi,

Well said. I also hoped that was intended as a joke. Whenever I go to the Temple, I see almost all the participants chanting together with the priest and sometimes, I feel very secluded for not knowing how to chant it without referring to my phone or book. It looks like every professional here in Florida who had migrated from India had learned Sanatana Dharma very well as they are not only able to recite Sanskrit slokas but also provide interpretation for such slokas. My wife attends at least three classes one for MookapanchaSathi, another for Soundarya Lahari and third one for Lalitha Sahasranamam to learn the meaning of those Slokas she had been chanting by heart for years. There are people who have understood the meaning of all of these Slokas living in the US.

Sometime back, I attended a class conducted by a home-maker who taught us Sloka by Sloka Adi Sankara's "Vivekachoodamani". Every time a class is conducted to recite Rudram, there is so much interest among young and old. Mondays and every Pradosham days are very crowded in the Temple. Sometimes, I feel I had never been in spiritual and religious activities back in India as much as I do now. Perhaps, when I had access to everything, I didn't see the value much. Motivation here is very high primarily because commitment and participation from peers here is extraordinary. I barely find a parking space if I had to go to the Temple on a festival day. The weekends are dedicated to teach children about Indian culture and heritage and there are many Sloka classes, language classes, Basics of Sanatana Dharma classes, etc. Even priests who migrate to the US tell openly that the commitment and dedication of devotees here is extraordinary. It is not important where we live but Shraddha is what is necessary.

 

Thanks Viswa sir.

 

So true!

 

Years ago R.K.Narayan wrote about the America he has visited and experienced. Here is an excerpt:

"Building imposing Indian temples in America, installing our gods therein and importing Indian priests to perform the puja and festivals, are only imitative of Indian existence and could have only a limited value. Social and religious assemblies at the temples (in America) might mitigate boredom but only temporarily. I have lived as a guest for extended periods in many Indian homes in America and have noticed the ennui that descends on a family when they are stuck at home.

Children growing up in America present a special problem. They have to develop themselves on a shallow foundation without a cultural basis, either Indian or American. Such children are ignorant of India and without the gentleness and courtesy and respect for parents, which forms the basic training for a child in an Indian home, unlike the American upbringing whereby a child is left alone to discover for himself the right code of conduct. Aware of his child's ignorance of Indian life, the Indian parent tries to cram into the child's little head all possible information during an 'Excursion Fare' trip to the mother country."
​

This view would remind us the story of "Blind Men and the Elephant". How each of them felt the elephant at some part of its body, and described what the beast ought to look like.

His full essay is at this link:
My America by R.K. Narayan

 

Dear Madam Lakshmi and Viswa Sir,
I think you are hurt by my response.What I have written is a true incident.But I know pretty well that such instances cannot be genearalised.My son is living with his family in california for the past 20 years.I had been there on seven to eight occasions.I have taken my grandson to Carnatic music class and has moved with his teacher, the niece of Lalgudi Jayaraman.
When I have enquired about these things to my son and daughter-in-law they also accept what I say.But my son added that they have to live there. and that they have to take only positive aspects.There are nearly 15 very close relatives of mine living overseas. My daughter also is in Singapore where many South Indians live.I had occasion to be in Singapore for one year. Very inquisitive, as I am, I have moved with many of them.
I have just expressed my views,though my own kith and kin live there.
Human mind works the same way. When we want to follow certain traditions in a new environment, there are likely to be certain obsessions and exaggerations .It is quite natural.
When I attended Vijayadasami Celebrations in my grandson's class I saw all the teen age girls wearing the traditional 'pavadai-davani', a rare sight in madras or even in my native place Srirangam now a days.
We live in a world undergoing lot of changes.
As long as the change is for better, it is good.

When we discuss certain realities we analyse certain aspects which may not be agreeable to people. It is not our intention to impress our ideas on others.
Individual experiences are different and enable them to form certain impressions.If the same type of experiences get repeated, human mind tends to accept.This rule applies to all human beings without exception,however unprejudiced one tries to be.
There are so many tendencies in Tamilnadu, especially in Chennai, which we totally dislike.But we have to live amidst those difficulties ,which have become part and parcel of our life.When we discuss about our home land ,our avoidable problems, incorrigible human tendencies, we have to just accept and move on.
There are pros and cons everywhere under the sky.Sometimes it reveals and sometimes it is hidden.That is all. There is no question of ridiculing others in whichever part of land they reside.
I have accepted many things in life as they come.This is one such occasion.
Thanks and regards,
jayasala42

 

How did you come to this conclusion Madam? Did I say anything to indicate that I was hurt by your post? You are entitled to your opinion and I just happened to disagree. There is no question of getting hurt by the opinions expressed in social media. I have just listed my experiences.

There is much difference between the first quote and second quote above. Even a researcher who has dived deep into the subject may like to qualify, "there are situations where things are done differently in overseas conditions".

May be their circle of friends overdo traditional things and they are merely sharing their personal experiences. This can't become real across the United States.

No Madam.Let me try to say it direct but in a most respectful way.
It is just a conjecture by a handful without any basis for such assumption. Why should there be obsession or exaggeration for something that comes naturally to people who were raised in India? They may adapt to the new environment but their inherent qualities of how they were raised don't change.

Does it count as obsession or exaggeration? May be they didn't have another occasion to wear traditional Indian dress. If a woman wears a Saree regularly living in the US other than to work, is it obsession or exaggeration?

I understand. But it is also common for people to express different ideas in response being closer to the situation. I live here for 23 years in Florida and I have come to a different conclusion. Even people visiting from India including my MIL (who used to visit every 2 years and now lives in the US) is always overwhelmed when she participates in social and spiritual events. My intention is also not to impress my ideas on you but to state the facts as experienced by me.

I agree with this logic but it doesn't make it true.

Respectfully

Viswa