Christmas present from husband

When I looked at the title, I thought it was a happy thread. May God give you strength to pass through this phase. Hope you get all that you desire (happiness and contentment)

 

hay OP .. do' t be Sorry.. tho your thread name makes other feel special and drag them to checkout what exactly the present but you posted in right forum which is "Life without Spouse"..

i wish Good luck for you. Do' t worry everything will be okay, no matter what, all is well. So Be cool and Strong. t.c

 

Desilady13 sister,

Don't worry, Anything that happens let it be for your good, some torn pages of our life's book do exist, for some in the form of health, finance, may be for some at the stake of life, discard those pages and turn the new ones to read on.

May Baba bless you and guide you to go through this calmly and live a better life after, Let your Baby be also blessed to get the warmth of the mom, surrender unto thy feet and he will take care of the rest. will keep you in prayers, SAIRAM

 

Hi dear,

hugs to you. It seems to me that he has done it solely to harass you. I am sure you are going to do this; but do get legal opinion as soon as possible.

I have seen this happen to an acquaintance where the child's dad did exactly the same though the dad and mum were separated and in different continents for at least 2 years before he filed for custody of a child he hasn't seen in 2 years! The good news is that he ended up paying the legal fees and she has complete custody of the child with visitation rights for the dad - which he hasn't exercised in the last few years either.

Please do get legal opinion sweetheart. I'll pray for you. May the new year rid you of the old nonsense and bring you lots of joyous moments.

love
g

 

I also came in looking for a happy early Christmas present ((((. I'm sorry to hear this. I don't know what to tell you dear other than you are in my prayers and god have something wonderful in this basket for you and may be he is taking a little extra time to present that to you. A big hug dear. ((

 

@OP You and your baby will be in my prayers .... and I still have this feeling that there's a gift for you in here ... only time will tell ... hoping the very best for you :thumbsup

 

OP,

I am sure as a loving mother God will see it fit to do right by you and give you custody and financial support. Please do not get disheartened. Take care of your health and take it day by day as it comes...For every bad person or situation we come across we do get to meet a good Samaritan...I will pray for you and your child.

 

I'm an atheist, so I tend to believe in half of the maxim, "God helps those who helps themselves". This means that while you can get solace, comfort, and encouragement from your faith, only a very good lawyer and a tenacious fighting spirit in you will enable you to win this battle.

Get a GREAT lawyer, and fight this. If your husband is as bad as you say he is (and I believe you), then you cannot allow for even the slightest possibility that he will get sole custody of your child. Obviously, he does not want this. If he was so interested in being a father, he would have made an effort while you were together. So, he is clearly expecting that if he comes out swinging (that is, makes the first move), he will scare you and intimidate you and make you miserable.

Don't allow this to happen. It doesn't matter that he has forced your hand, and you are not ready to start divorce proceedings. It doesn't matter who files first. You have to toughen up and be the kind of mother who puts everything she has into her fight for a good life for her child, and herself.

Your husband is a bully, and he and his lawyer are still trying to bully you. Now, you have the law on your side, as opposed to when you were still "happily" married. Your history will show that you are the dedicated and sole caregiver of your child. Your lawyer will know how to fight these tactics with counter-strategies.

Don't give up hope. You have done nothing wrong (except perhaps choosing the wrong life partner, and you have a chance to fix that now). I'm not sure of your legal standing regarding ownership of your house, but a lawyer should be able to advise you here.

I think your husband, like most abusers, is a great judge of character. He knows how to push your buttons, and he is relying on you to fall apart. Are you going to fulfill all his expectations? You talk about him giving you a chance... why? You are divorcing him, and divorced people tend not to do favors for each other. He owes you nothing. He isn't going to save you from anything, especially himself.

Don't expect anything from him except the worst. Has he given you any reason to think differently? I imagine you wouldn't be in this situation now if he had. Even if you are falling apart on the inside, you have to act like you have it all together for the sake of your child. You will strike no greater blow to your husband's attempts to intimidate you than if you remain unbowed.

Gather your support system, and equip yourself with legal knowledge so you know where you stand instead of being blindsided by your husband's actions. None of this is new - it is played out daily in hundreds of lives. Take advantage of this fact, and wise up. Join a support group, look for information online, and empower yourself with knowledge. Reach out to people, and you will find help and strength.

Top Five Online Divorce Support Groups - Ask.com

I wish you fortitude and good fortune. But remember that YOU'VE got to do this. And I'm pretty sure that when you do, you will emerge from this challenging experience a better and stronger person. Unfortunately, adversity is one of our best teachers. Rise up to the challenge. Perhaps this will be, after all, your greatest Christmas present. You just don't realize it now.