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charity brings detachment or arrogance?

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by cutemonster, Aug 1, 2012.

  1. cutemonster

    cutemonster Platinum IL'ite

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    To prevent us from becoming too attached to our wealth and money almost all the religions encourage us to give away a part of our earnings. It is said that by giving to others we are giving back something which was not ours.charity is a part of all cultures and religions. and my family was no different charity has been a very important part of my upbringing.
    In Sikhism, we are encouraged to donate 1/10th of the earnings in some charitable way. similarly Hindus are also encouraged to donate dasvanth or one tenth for charity.Infact in Hinduism we see even the marriage of daughter is called as kanya daan which is form of daan or charity.
    My mother would encourage us to even give a part of our pocket money to needy,that habit over the years became a part of life .we were always told that its not about how much you give but the love with which you give.
    when we give to others without any desire we let go our attachments.we all tend to forget that we are not permanent owners of this material wealth , first our fore fathers had it and now we are the owners and tomorrow our younger generation will become owners. death will separate us from all this one day.
    It is also said that sharing and charity helps us in our spiritual journey.
    But in this one very important thing we were taught was that charity is not done with pride or ego. when your left hand gives something even the right hand should not know about it.
    somehow these days i am feeling charity has become more of a public show off. In many religious places i see plaques with the name of donors and even the amount they gave. I just dont understand what is the purpose of all this ? we give away a part of our earnings to attain detachment but here i feel we are getting more firmly attached and even the extra baggage of ego and arrogance is coming.
    And all the so called charity events where most of the people go to see which celebrity is coming and most of women discuss what the others were wearing and who gave what?????????
    why do we need to make a announcement on loudspeaker about how charitable we are!!
    And then there are forced charities like, so called groups which come to collect chanda for different puja , utsav and god knows what all and force you to give fixed amount in the name of charity.
    last week in a religious place i saw a young boy being shown a plaque by his father that this is your great grandfather who gave so and so amount of money , there was a sense of arrogance in the father. I mean its good to encourage children to donate but is this the right way?
    why do we need to make announcements that so and so gave so much money. Infact these days i feel there is a competition between people , oh Mr. X gave 1000 then i will more.
    charity seems to be a way to show world that see i am so rich that i can give away a few thousands easily!!!
    should we do charity just because people should remember us when are gone by seeing all those plaques and hoardings o should it be because people should talk that see this person is so great !!
    When we were kids mom used to tell a story that there was a saint and people would come to seek his blessings and gave money in his charity. The saint did not keep a penny with him but gave it to poor kids. once a very rich man came and gave lots of money , gold and other things. In his mind he thought i have given so much to this poor saint , now he can live comfortable and i will become his favorite disciple and he should come and hug and bless me himself.The saint could read the rich man's mind. he did not move from his place. Then came a very poor person who gave one coin in the offering. The saint got up and hugged the poor man. The rich man was very offended and asked the saint why he showed this disparity, the saint answered when you were offering money , you did not have a gratitude in your heart towards god , you did not feel that you are returning what was not yours but you had arrogance and this poor man who has nothing and even walked all these miles so as to save this coin to put in offerings had no arrogance. he offered everything we had with utmost love and gratitude.
    True charity is supposed to be liberating and should free your mind.
    It is very difficult in reality to not to be attached to our material wealth.The god never asks us give everything and live the life of fakirs . we have duties and obligations towards our families but still donating a part of our money to needy brings a feeling of contentment which cant be described in words .
    It is not necessary to give to a religious place only, we can help anyone who need help. Let it start from home, see if you can help your maid or some poor kid by sponsoring some books or his fees.But we should do this with a feeling of not expecting anything in return, even gratitude.
     
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  2. shyamala1234

    shyamala1234 Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi,

    A nice one. Charity should not be done with arrogance or display of wealth. It should become a way of life. From childhood, children should be taught to share things and when a chance comes we should make them give. So, they would learn.

    You are absolutely right. It need not be given to fakirs or religious places only...any one in need should be given. Need not be in terms of money only. Wiping the tears of a person, putting hands on the shoulder of a grieving person. If one of our maid or servants or any one fall sick...one can advise them where to go, whom to approach. We know a retired Railway officer. There are some workers in Railways who have to get arrears. There are some formalities which they have to do ...like filling up some forms etc.They are illiterate. He used to sit with them doing all miscellaneous things....they used to feel so happy when they got their arrears. His wife is a teacher. She used to teach poor children whose parents are not educated. When they get good marks in exams she used to feel happier than them. Umpteen number of ways of helping. Go to some old age home near your house.....just sit and talk or even listen to them. That makes their day. One of our friends used to give the weekly and monthly magazines (old ones) to them. They used to feel so happy. They get only one paper in their old age home. All these things do not cost any money. Only the will to do and a little time. We need not be Birlas or Tatas to do charity work.

    Syamala
     
  3. cutemonster

    cutemonster Platinum IL'ite

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    you are right syamala, children being the future should be taught sharing. But these days we see kids not even ready to share their toys , so is something wrong with the way they are being brought up?
    charity does not include money only as rightly pointed by you, a small act of kindness is enough to help keep humanity alive!
     
  4. hridhaya

    hridhaya Gold IL'ite

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    hi cutemonster, this blog tells how much how much you care for others. so nice.
    what to say, charity has become a mockery these days.most people cannot do charity without a motive behind it.
    Another thing that often bothers me is temples being rich in India.It is after all public money right? shouldn't it go back to society for its improvement?
    When there are millions of poor people in India, is it too difficult to be content and help the needy when we find an opportunity?
     
  5. cutemonster

    cutemonster Platinum IL'ite

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    hi hridhaya!
    i like your username , is it your real name?
    I agree that charity has become mockery but still i feel there are some genuine people who do care about others.
    May be we should try to be example to others rather than waiting to find one!
     
  6. vaidehi71

    vaidehi71 IL Hall of Fame

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    very true.in india i know few people who donate for the sake of name, pride etc to temple functions. i am not against it but the way it has grown is not for the good.
     
  7. rgsrinivasan

    rgsrinivasan IL Hall of Fame

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    Arrogance / for the sake of pride / name or whatever, all of these are required too, as there are so many 'have nots' here Cute Monster. Nice user name and a nicer post. What I really feel so happy about Sikhs is the fact that they do not let one of their people beg at any cost. Thanks. -rgs
     
  8. hridhaya

    hridhaya Gold IL'ite

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    Hi cute lady, are you an optimist?. you response reminded me of the famous quote of Mahatma, "Be the change you want to see".

    Thanks for liking the username. It is not my real name.
     
  9. cutemonster

    cutemonster Platinum IL'ite

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    hi rgsrinivasan
    thanks for the fb.
    well thats an interesting view, i would like you to elaborate it. why do you think arrogance or charity in the name of pride required?
    It would be nice to see the other side of views :)
     
  10. cutemonster

    cutemonster Platinum IL'ite

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    hi hridhaya
    well i am a optimistic with some moments of pessimism in between.
    But yes i do believe that you have to give your best effort and when you do that your efforts gets rewarded but if the things dont work out then may be god has better plans !
    and about being the change you want to see, well isn't it said charity begins at home:)
     

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