Cant forget

daffodiill · Mar 25, 2013

hello friends..
MIL..how dare you ask my husband to come in two wheeler to pooja at new home
ME..we will be pooja ..must not get up in btw..so only i asked him whether he can come with cousin..

MIL..for that how can u ask my my husband come in two wheeler

MIL..i asked you get all ur jewellery and put a list and give to me,why have you not given??
i got pissed off at this and asked her "why should i show my jewels to u"
she got in taxi ..husband went to them and said soemthin..she slapped my husband's arm very roughly and said something and left.. this is just few arguments we had..

NOW MY PROB IS..I KNOW I CANT AVOID HER COMPLETELY FROM OUR LIFE..BUT I AM HURTED DEEPLY..I CANT JUST LET HER REUNITE WIHT US AS IF NOTHING HAD HAPPENED.I AM UNABLE TO FORGET AND EVEN TO SLEEP,EVEN EAT PROPERLY..WHENEVER I AM ALONE..HER WORDS HURT ME SO MUCH..MY HUSBAND IS ASLO SUFFERING.HE TOLD ME THAT SHE SAID THAT HE MUST NOT COME TO HER HOUSE AFTER THIS.PLZ SUGGEST ME SOME ADVICE WHAT I CAN DO AFTER ALL THIS..REALLY WOULD USE SOME HELP HERE..:drowning

Swasha · Mar 25, 2013

Dear OP,

Whatever happened is for your good. Dont give your jewels to her, be firm. Just maintain a Hi, Bye relationip, it gives you peace of mind.

guesshoo · Mar 25, 2013

Hello,

Your MIL has been nasty to you and your DH has tried to defend you to the level that he is also in the doghouse now! OP, you must keep your DH on your side.

You are right in saying that you are not going to avoid her all your(her) life; you will have to face each other. However, only with your attitude can you protect yourself. Be polite, but cool. Just don't get involved in anything with her. Let her and her DH sort out their travel/ food/ finances.

The thing I suppose is that no one would have been this mean to you ever. That's probably why you are not able to forget it and are letting her affect you so much. But now that you realize it, the best way to move forward is to accept that she is a mean bully whom you can't change and thank your stars for a sweet DH who you must endeavour to keep on your side.

You and your DH take solace in each other and strive to occupy your time with other things. As in, when you catch yourself thinking about your MIL, put on your favourite comedy DVD or call your friend or start browsing your favourite blogs online. Do something that cheers you up. Some people say it is being in denial but it used to work for me and as time went on, my mean MIL didn't affect my mind anymore.

Hugs,
G

muyalkutti · Mar 25, 2013

Dear OP,

Don't give much importance to your negative feelings now. I know worst mils than yours. Just hang in there. Listen to nice musics. In the long run either you will get used to her attitude or you will ignore her. May God give Peace to your beautiful heart.

jaanu143 · Mar 25, 2013

Hi , dont worry...If they want to have a look at ur jewellery , show them....But dont handover to them....When my IN-laws or relatives asked abt my jewellery when newly married,I one day arranged an exhibition and later told them that i kept in locker...AS keeping at home is not safe...Aftersome time they stopped asking...Thats it...

GiJoe · Mar 26, 2013

Don't fall for you mil's tricks make sure you and your dh's relationship is fine

soshana · Mar 26, 2013

As your husband seems to be understanding and reasonable, why worry about your MIL. However good or bad you or your MIL is you are still going to have major problems. Just take it easy and move on. Do not give the jewels, is she your protector?. It reminds me, my FIL ( not MIL ) handed me a key and asked me to place my jewels in a new safe and not in the safe my mother had in. I refused politely. Who are they to protect your jewels, they were given by your parents for you to keep.