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Can men and women never be good friends ?

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by vishnu vandana, Sep 7, 2005.

  1. radhavenkatesh

    radhavenkatesh Silver IL'ite

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    :)

    NO i dont think so if a man is a frnd of a woman they call him boy frnd or a women a guys frn a girl frnd and not a friend thts our society. Being social animals we cannot get over friendly tht we share and care our male frnds more than we shd there is a limit and a line of demarkation given which runs in all our veins and arteries none can cross it .
    you cud have a male frn only if he is ur family frnd and not ur own frnd and tht too u need to take care tht ur frndsp wudnt bring problems in ur family life and for sure men dont appreciate their wives being frndly to men . None do .
    bcz frndsp slowly leads to relationship if there is any problem in either ways which r really harmful to family ties.
    I sometimes feel women dont have liberty to even maintain their female frnds in contact after marriage most of our college frns or classmates r forgotten wht great ease and we also dont remember most of their names bcz there r no contacts frm ourside the same cud be correct frm their side also bcz they r under our spouses acceptance level
    but the same is not the case wht men they can have their childhood frns and also their female frns as we women dont say or stop them frm their frnsps
    funny isnt it but thts truth whn we women cant have our own female frnds how can we have male frns :))
     
  2. geeta_sathish

    geeta_sathish Senior IL'ite

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    If you have read the book 'Men are from mars and women are from venus" you will understand the answer for this.

    If either the guy or the girl is married, then the spouse factor also comes into picture, as pointed out by many. However, even if either of them are not married, it takes a lot of understanding to have a person from the opposite sex to be your best friend.

    My best (bestest - if that word is possible) friend is a guy and our friendship has been intact all these 15+ years and I can discuss with him anything under the sun . We did not lose our friendship after I got married and my hubby dear understands me enough to be supportive of our friendship. My friend is getting married next month, and when I had been to India a couple of months ago, I met his would-be and she is also very sweet. I am sure she will be as understanding as my husband.

    I also have some other great friends who are guys and I have never felt that friendship is gender specific.

    Cheers,
    G
     
  3. aami

    aami New IL'ite

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    i do have friends of opposite sex.but the thing is how u r keeping the limit.its good to have friends of opposite sex.but keeping the limit is the most important thing.
     
  4. aabcii

    aabcii Gold IL'ite

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    Ya men and women can be good friends ,but the honesty and open mindness is also the matter of concern . There is a limit that should be maintained that usually guys fail to do so.
     
  5. aabcii

    aabcii Gold IL'ite

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    Hi
    Me too agree with your opinion. Hiding and maintaining relationship is very bad and dangerous tooo
     
  6. Arunarc

    Arunarc Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Hello Friends
    Indeed a good topic. I think we are all human beings so making friends is a wonderful thing either it is male or a female. As some of the friends have already mentioned her that we should be in our limitations, yes this is true we should always have our boundaries drawn. And it is true that we should always see to it that our spouse knows about our male friends and they do not have any objections to it.
    I am a person who has lot of male and female friends. But yes my hubby knows about it, He is a wonderful guy. He has no girl friends but has never had an objection towards me making a male as my friend.
    Trust and faith is very important in any relations. Make friends, as friendship is one of the most wonderful relationship we can make. Without friends there is no life. This is what I believe in. But don't make such friends who create problems in your life.
    I have friends of all ages who are younger to me and also elder to me and I am proud of have just wonderful male friends.
     
  7. CharuKaur

    CharuKaur Senior IL'ite

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    Hi ladies

    I completely disagree with the statement!
    i believe its nothing but a mind-game - a concept of understanding.

    In today's era where women are working/studying in just every corner of the universe it is hard to keep away from the interaction between the two sexes! I am an engineer, and have witnessed a single girl student amongst a group of 50 boy students in branches like mechanical, production etc.. Now how is being friends with the opposite sex unjustified in such scenarios???
    Once married, if the mutual understanding between husband and wife is strong; how does having friends in opposite sex trouble the relationship??? Ofcourse, in case it does, family should take precedence and the friend ruled out.

    I firmly believe that platonic relationships are possible and are in existence for that matter! and its only a matter of time when more people would start realizing its piousness and burying the social myth of keeping friends of the same sex only.

    Charu..
     

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