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called 911 and its impact

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by lovers, Jun 25, 2012.

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  1. lovers

    lovers Senior IL'ite

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    its been a long time i have been in the abusive environment silently suffering
    when i cant take it any more ... i had to call 911 and DH being arrested for this .
    again when i heard that he was in jail felt really sorry for him and had to bail him ..
    and now when he comes back we r no where communicating with each other through a common friend some times he talks to me ... but still wants me to say not to prosecute him which would effect his green card process ...
    pun88 and chocolate if in case you could pm ur email id that would be really great !! as i cant pm you . i badly need ur advice ..

    at this point of time i really dont know what to do ...
     
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  2. flowerlady

    flowerlady IL Hall of Fame

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    Post in Married life forum as few come here.
    Whatever you do it seems to be end of marriage. No spouse ever forgives or forgets being sent to jail by another.
    He should have thought about the consequences of DV earlier and its effect on his GC.
    Right now his GC appears to be more important than the marriage!
     
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  3. lovers

    lovers Senior IL'ite

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    thanks flowerlady u have responded to me earlier as well thank you so much ..
    let me post there ..
     
  4. rosy786

    rosy786 IL Hall of Fame

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    Re: called 911

    i will pm puni about this dear for quick reply...take care
     
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  5. puni88

    puni88 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Re: called 911

    Hi,
    What you want to do???
    Here in this country, you can't take your complaint back.
    He has to go thru the trail in the court.
    No matter what's the outcome from court, calling 911 would impact his green card processing.
    It would depend on your lawyer and his lawyer's decision.
    So he needs to talk to you and discuss what you both want in future.
     
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  6. Foundlove

    Foundlove Gold IL'ite

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    Why did you call 911.? Police do not arrest without evidence ,so there was evidence of DV or something.

    If he is physically abusing you, leave him immediately. But you need to post all that's happening and your reason to call 911.
    FL
     
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  7. positivegal

    positivegal Gold IL'ite

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    He deserves punishment, and you deserve a better life
     
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  8. lovers

    lovers Senior IL'ite

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    Re: called 911

    thankyou so much rosy ..
     
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  9. lovers

    lovers Senior IL'ite

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    Re: called 911

    punitha i already pm you can you pls get back to me at my email id .
    thanks friends for responding me ... i know you have been really kind and supported me thanks alot .
     
  10. Foundlove

    Foundlove Gold IL'ite

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    Re: called 911

    Dear OP,
    If there was physical violence then u must not let this go. Get a good lawyer and file for restraining order. If u are not working, check out battered women's shelter for south Asian woman and u I'll get legal help for free.
    Let me tell u my story. When such a situation arose with me, I fell for everyone's suggestion and made the biggest of my life. I still regret it.
    1. Ex immediately started using emotional abuse and was ver careful to not leave any marks. He would shout,yell, throw things, utter the most vulgar language and I could not prove anything later.
    2. I finally got out after a year but I could not get him on battering charges.
    3. He married twice after that. One of the wife got out after she miscarried and the other one almost died. This is within 2 yrs of marriage with them.
    I till today think that both those woman would not have suffered if I would not have taken my complaint back.it took me 2 apologies, 2 years of going to meditation ( in temple) to get over this.

    Think very carefully. Check this out.
    The cycle of violence

    FL
     
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