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buying toy secretely

Discussion in 'Intimacy' started by Iamagoodgirl, Jan 20, 2016.

  1. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    I have nothing to advice here. But I thoroughly enjoyed this thread.

    OP, your intentions are right. But how you can go for it depends on how much privacy you get.

    For a person like me, with an average drive, I think a smart phone with internet and privacy with the correct mood would be enough for self pleasing. Not sure what I would do, if I have an high drive.

    If you think a toy is necessary, then go for a toy which doesn't have any identifiable shape. Something like a penis. Because your nosy relatives could make it problematic, since you live with them.

    There are many shapes available. Go for a different one, and tell them it is a massage machine got from store for your back pain.

    But as someone said, try intimacy at early mornings. I've read somewhere that men do have high urge during 3-5 am, and that time your H will not be dead tired.
    Try initiating around this time.
     
    Rajma, Anusuya and nehakhetal like this.
  2. vidhyabaskar

    vidhyabaskar Gold IL'ite

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    hi OP,

    I personally feel, sex toys for use by women, are figments of mens' curiosity. All the dildos and vibrators etc, are bought by women just out of curiosity. I doubt it will be of any real and meaningful use.

    One instance I know : The husband of my friend bought a toy (dont know the real reason). All she told me was, it only makes her sore and irritating over there, leave alone any pleasure.



    But it is my belief that the following detailed disclosure by a woman would be more help to you, instead of putting huge money on some toy which will be lying unused in a corner of a cup-board in your house, after a few unsuccessful attempts to put it to its optimum use.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZvSJE9n0GfA

    Just listen to every word of this woman. You will not buy any toy.
     
  3. Iamagoodgirl

    Iamagoodgirl Platinum IL'ite

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    hey everyone i was travelling for few days so wasnt here.good suggestions thanks all of you.esp above poster

    i was hoping atlist some ladies might have experience with toys and i will get feed back if its really worth investing in such tool or if its really that pleasurable.
    Looks like i will be first induslady to own toy :-D

    sgbv
    my husband sleeps around 2 pm.Its not possible to wake him up for that just after2 hours , he is dead tired because of hectic day.
     
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  4. kcb

    kcb IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear OP,

    I think buying toy is not a permanent solution for your problem, especially when your DH is against to it. More over it can increase insecurity in your DH. Speak to him and tell him clearly that he need to spend time with you, he can record Big boss or can watch online later. Make him understand that nothing is important than a relationship. Ask him to adjust his timings according to your sleeping time, he can come to bedroom early and spend time with you and later he can go back to his tv programs. But deal with this issue gently as this is a sensitive issue. Make sure your words will not hurt your DH. Goodluck
     
  5. kcb

    kcb IL Hall of Fame

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    Just to add.....

    Don't go for shortcuts to solve your problem. You are only looking at a temporary solution, this can satisfy you temporarily but not going to solve your problem permanently. More over it can increase the distance between you and your DH. I agree physical intimacy is important but more than that bonding, love & affection is more important. So don't get into any clashes or allow any misunderstandings in your relation as your husband is against to this.

    If he is busy watching tv, go to him and tell him openly that you need him in bedroom now as you feel the desire. Or go and sit next to him and woo him.

    SAYANESHU RAMBHA means not only to satisfy husband, but also to make him to satisfy your desires & to get what you want from him :). If he doesn't understand, then make him understand. You don't have to hesitate to express your desire to him, after all he is your dearest husband right :). He has a duty & responsibility towards you, so remind him about his duty.
     
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  6. rupz

    rupz Silver IL'ite

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    Dear OP,

    Had a good laugh on one side and also another cunning smile later.
    I too had intimacy issue, no mood, no time and heavy work load.

    Firstly I m also proud owner of toys ;) (plural)
    It all began after I read the 50 shades series...hope there are ILts who have read the book.

    My DH travels a lot to for work and he's not here when ever I m in need for some action.

    I had just mentioned toys just during one of our weekly chats and he seemed ok with the thought.

    So when he returned I surprised him with the purchases and then we started experimenting when ever we had time and it was good.
    We made up with lost time.. :)

    Guess it is ok to have and use but not giving up the intimate feeling or anything. It only made our bond better and showed that time and little planning and can make that spark,that X factor come back into the relationship.

    It's my honest opinion.
    Hope no one feels offended by it.
    Sorry to hurt any readers feelings.

    Regards,
    Rupz.
     
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  7. bulesha

    bulesha Silver IL'ite

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    Interesting thread, In India, company sells these toys under “Sexual wellness products” and believe it, its 1500 Crores INR business. Some of the companies sell online are Flipkart, imbesharam.com, thatspersonal.com and ohmysecrets.com & also facilitate delivery as per your timing, place etc.

    As you mentioned your DH is against it, which means you have already discussed your desire to buy one. If DH still hasn’t got your hint but has energy to watch TV till late night, you need to do introspection, maybe he isn’t interested???? Talk to him openly about it, after all in 21th century, it shouldn’t be difficult for women to ask for sex or is it?
     
  8. MrCroc

    MrCroc Silver IL'ite

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    Quite some time back, there was a product line from Philips with a tag 'feel your feminity'. Obviously, I never took one. They used to run ads in news paper.

    On a different note, when I was quite busy few
    months back due to my new work, I and Mrs Croc used to have these super quick and insanely intense encounters. No prep just jump in and be done in 15 mins top. It required some
    Creativity but idea of doing things in secret and intensity made more than enough for less time. Mostly before going to work or her going to Pooja etc. I know we are going to hell but it's worth it.
     
  9. GlobetrotterG

    GlobetrotterG Silver IL'ite

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    From my experience, it's really easy to order & buy online. Just to go google and type Dildo/Vibrator etc. You will see all the sites in the google search.

    1. Most of the leading sites do sell these products under 'Wellness' category. Please buy from leading sites

    2. Please do some cost comparison , as some of them do sell at exorbitant prices.

    3. Your credit card statement will not show that you have purchased a dildo :). They come with a discrete packing, so there is no need to spend sleepless nights thinking your in-laws will figure out.( Do check this at the website as well, most leading sites have this practice)

    4. Better to get that delivered to your work address , you can collect from the courier package outside the office ( as it will be less annoying if your in-laws/kids open the package at home)

    5. You do need to find a place at home to store it. My preference would be loft in a locked suitcase :)

    If you are still having sleepless nights figuring out how to order, i suggest you articulate your concern.

    Thanks,
    Rekha.
    -----------------------------------------------------
    My blog : www.quora.com/profile/Rekha-K-75
     
    Last edited: Jan 17, 2019

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